Approached 100 women during the day - No success!

AmsterdamAssassin

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Neither man has good verbal game. One has better outcomes because he's roughly an 8 in looks.
So good verbal game is more important than looks.
 

Fruitbat

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Cold approach is not walking around propositioning random women.

Let’s step back. When you walk around city centres, person, man or woman approaches you. What do you think?

He wants money.
She’s scamming.
He or she is a weirdo.


In normal social interaction in the western hemisphere, adults don’t approach adults cold in the street. We are conditioned to scrutinise this deeply as it’s a danger flag usually.

Cold approach, if you want to give it a name, which I don’t think it should because it should be your default setting if you’re a single man, is interacting with people whenever it’s appropriate. Here are some examples:

Waiting for public transport (only when there isn’t tons of people there who can overhear and make your chosen lady embarrassed)

In a cafe or shop after qualified eye contact, or with a cover (I’m trying to find this shop. I was gonna buy that coffee is it good? You need some imagination to make it non-creepy)

At a class of some sort.


The list is endless really. I got numbers from checkout girls (generally went back 2-3 times to see her again so there was connection established), petrol station workers, on a bus (several times but every time the girl showed me via looks she was interested), parties, all sorts.

As we used to say, I used to “chat up” every decent girl I could find and it was done mainly via humour and insincerity. This should be any man’s general demeanour and I STILL do it now, even as a married man with greying hair. Even though I’m not trying to date these women! I often talk to men kinda like this! It’s called be sociable. Quite often the younger women will actually flirt back as I’m so far out of range it’s safe. The women my own age will flirt if interested and if not they will close off. Some will close down. Guys I try to joke with sometimes just don’t have the skills and will get defensive and close down. That’s life, people have varying social skills. Hell, some kids were wading through the stream at the back of my house yesterday and as I was gardening I told them there were sharks and crocodiles. They walked by in stunned silence and ignored me. Felt a bit of a dad-joke dik but truth be told they probably have slightly autistic, dumbass parents and don’t have the experience with confident and sociable adults.

It’s a mindset of openness and enthusiasm which if you carry it off in life will get you many openings. It carried me through and let me bat well above my average with women. The only risk is sometimes you’ll be a bit self conscious as sometimes people don’t parlay back and you fall a bit flat. So what? It’s worth the effort.

As a single man this approach turns your whole life into cold approach. Wandering around dressed up in LV clothes walking up to broads going “Hi there” to me is a colossal waste of effort and isn’t a natural way to live. For the time you spent you could have just worked the day and hired an escort in the evening. If you’re doing it to get laid it’s a lousy return.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Let’s step back. When you walk around city centres, person, man or woman approaches you. What do you think?

He wants money.
She’s scamming.
He or she is a weirdo.
In most cases, people approaching me want to understand why I can walk around with a cat on my shoulder that doesn't appear intimidated by the noise and people around us. Men think I'm either cool or weird, but they're mostly respectful. Women always try to make a connection, telling me they have a cat too and how they wished their cat would ride their shoulder like my cat does. Many think it's like a magic trick, the way my cat seems so totally at ease with me.

Martyn Klook angry look up by Brian George 020.jpeg

Even before I walked around with my cat (and there are plenty of times when I leave him at home), women approach me because I have a different vibe from other men. I'm semi-retired, comfortable being who I am, never in a hurry, always in control of myself, watching the world with an amused detachment.

Most of the time, women don't even understand why they come up to me beyond 'you look interesting'. I don't appear to be like other men, who ogle them and try to reel them in. I don't care about that and they don't understand why I don't care about seducing them.

Truth is that women don't want the men that want them, they want the men that don't care about them, because that requires effort on their part and it makes them feel good if they manage to seduce me. They often resent the part that they cannot control me, but that is exciting them on another level. And they know they have to bring their best efforts or I lose interest in them. I don't need women to have a fulfilling life, which makes me more desirable than the men who need women to fill some void inside them.
 
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Slowhandluke

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Cold approach is not walking around propositioning random women.

Let’s step back. When you walk around city centres, person, man or woman approaches you. What do you think?

He wants money.
She’s scamming.
He or she is a weirdo.


In normal social interaction in the western hemisphere, adults don’t approach adults cold in the street. We are conditioned to scrutinise this deeply as it’s a danger flag usually.

Cold approach, if you want to give it a name, which I don’t think it should because it should be your default setting if you’re a single man, is interacting with people whenever it’s appropriate. Here are some examples:

Waiting for public transport (only when there isn’t tons of people there who can overhear and make your chosen lady embarrassed)

In a cafe or shop after qualified eye contact, or with a cover (I’m trying to find this shop. I was gonna buy that coffee is it good? You need some imagination to make it non-creepy)

At a class of some sort.


The list is endless really. I got numbers from checkout girls (generally went back 2-3 times to see her again so there was connection established), petrol station workers, on a bus (several times but every time the girl showed me via looks she was interested), parties, all sorts.

As we used to say, I used to “chat up” every decent girl I could find and it was done mainly via humour and insincerity. This should be any man’s general demeanour and I STILL do it now, even as a married man with greying hair. Even though I’m not trying to date these women! I often talk to men kinda like this! It’s called be sociable. Quite often the younger women will actually flirt back as I’m so far out of range it’s safe. The women my own age will flirt if interested and if not they will close off. Some will close down. Guys I try to joke with sometimes just don’t have the skills and will get defensive and close down. That’s life, people have varying social skills. Hell, some kids were wading through the stream at the back of my house yesterday and as I was gardening I told them there were sharks and crocodiles. They walked by in stunned silence and ignored me. Felt a bit of a dad-joke dik but truth be told they probably have slightly autistic, dumbass parents and don’t have the experience with confident and sociable adults.

It’s a mindset of openness and enthusiasm which if you carry it off in life will get you many openings. It carried me through and let me bat well above my average with women. The only risk is sometimes you’ll be a bit self conscious as sometimes people don’t parlay back and you fall a bit flat. So what? It’s worth the effort.

As a single man this approach turns your whole life into cold approach. Wandering around dressed up in LV clothes walking up to broads going “Hi there” to me is a colossal waste of effort and isn’t a natural way to live. For the time you spent you could have just worked the day and hired an escort in the evening. If you’re doing it to get laid it’s a lousy return.
I chat up people because it's entertaining and sometimes I want to see if they can be part of a team for the next or current project I'm working on a la jack sparrows in pubs recruiting a crew, or Hannibal on the A-team looking for team members.

if sex was the only goal of being sociable then a better ROI are escorts.
 

characternote

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Neither man has good verbal game. One has better outcomes because he's roughly an 8 in looks.
'verbal game' is basically irrelevant. The bar is very low. Just don't be the most boring person on earth, really. Or don't be completely socially uncalibrated.

If you are her 'type' then basically any 'verbal game' will work. You can be direct, indirect, humerous, serious, talk about whatever. It doesn't really matter. If she thinks you're hot it is very very hard to mess up. There's no risk even of 'running out of things to say' which happens to most guys in infields, because SHE will do more than her fair share! When a girl thinks i'm hot, it's effortless!

Conversley, if you are NOT her type (she doesn't like old men or fat men, bald or whatever) then your 'verbal game' is just nonsense delaying the rejection. There's not magic Jedi mind trick level of 'verbal game' where you can bend her to your will lol. If infields taught us anything, it's that! (for example, 'mystery' used to speak as though he can get ANY girl due to his 'game', but if you saw his infields, they were actually fairly painful and less than impressive! It's nonsense)

You can't negotiate attraction
 
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You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

SW15

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So good verbal game is more important than looks.
Looks are more important than verbal game.

In normal social interaction in the western hemisphere, adults don’t approach adults cold in the street. We are conditioned to scrutinise this deeply as it’s a danger flag usually.

Waiting for public transport (only when there isn’t tons of people there who can overhear and make your chosen lady embarrassed)

In a cafe or shop after qualified eye contact, or with a cover (I’m trying to find this shop. I was gonna buy that coffee is it good? You need some imagination to make it non-creepy)

At a class of some sort.


The list is endless really. I got numbers from checkout girls (generally went back 2-3 times to see her again so there was connection established), petrol station workers, on a bus (several times but every time the girl showed me via looks she was interested), parties, all sorts.
Street approach is one of many non-bar venues where approaches can be done. In this quote, you do mention some of the other venues.

In 2012, Roosh called street approaching the most difficult approach venue.

https://web.archive.org/web/20160331043049/http://www.rooshv.com/how-to-pick-up-girls-on-the-street

Wandering around dressed up in LV clothes walking up to broads going “Hi there” to me is a colossal waste of effort and isn’t a natural way to live. For the time you spent you could have just worked the day and hired an escort in the evening. If you’re doing it to get laid it’s a lousy return.
Lingering around a mall (both in the corridors between stores and inside of individual mall stores), a grocery store (intentionally slowing your own grocery shopping to meet women), or a bookstore in order to arrange first dates is generally going to be inefficient.
 
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Slowhandluke

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You can't negotiate attraction
You can...it's called walking away. Being able to walk away is attractive because it shows you understand reality. As they say:


Gather ye Rose-buds while ye may,
Old Time is still a-flying:
And this same flower that smiles to day,
To morrow will be dying.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Looks are more important than verbal game.
A normal looking dude with good verbal game will have the advantage over a good-looking dude with no verbal game.

At least, here in not-so-superficial Europe. How the situation is different in shallow America I don't know, probably more your expertise.
 

oc16

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Not to mention you are living in Germany; NOT the warmest and friendliest group of people.
 

corrector

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The Key word your looking for is TRUST.

Learn how to cultivate it in your approaches and your success rate should go up.
If the OP approached 100 women in the Philippeans, he's for sure get some numbers and dates.

As you yourself said, you were not successful until you went to the Philippeans. It's naturally easy to have women trust you there compared to Germany, don't you think?
 
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Hamurabimbi

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A normal looking dude with good verbal game will have the advantage over a good-looking dude with no verbal game.

At least, here in not-so-superficial Europe. How the situation is different in shallow America I don't know, probably more your expertise.
When I was an Outdoor Adventure guide I got with a lot of European tourist women. Whether they were interested because of my looks or because they wanted to bang the American adventure guide…I don’t know.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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this is very important. tell more about this?
I'm the opposite of needy. I live in abundance and don't have a scarcity mindset like most guys tend to have.

Neediness turns women off. The opposite of neediness turns women on. They don't like men who need them, they like the men that don't need them. And the less you need them, the more attractive you are.

I can handle that for about a week. Then. i start going nuts if some sort woman isn’t around.
But, and it's a big but, do you show women that neediness? Do you get clingy? If you understand (female) psychology, you know that neediness puts women off, so if you're needy but smart, you hide your neediness.
 

Gamisch

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Cold approach is not walking around propositioning random women.

Let’s step back. When you walk around city centres, person, man or woman approaches you. What do you think?

He wants money.
She’s scamming.
He or she is a weirdo.


In normal social interaction in the western hemisphere, adults don’t approach adults cold in the street. We are conditioned to scrutinise this deeply as it’s a danger flag usually.

Cold approach, if you want to give it a name, which I don’t think it should because it should be your default setting if you’re a single man, is interacting with people whenever it’s appropriate. Here are some examples:

Waiting for public transport (only when there isn’t tons of people there who can overhear and make your chosen lady embarrassed)

In a cafe or shop after qualified eye contact, or with a cover (I’m trying to find this shop. I was gonna buy that coffee is it good? You need some imagination to make it non-creepy)

At a class of some sort.


The list is endless really. I got numbers from checkout girls (generally went back 2-3 times to see her again so there was connection established), petrol station workers, on a bus (several times but every time the girl showed me via looks she was interested), parties, all sorts.

As we used to say, I used to “chat up” every decent girl I could find and it was done mainly via humour and insincerity. This should be any man’s general demeanour and I STILL do it now, even as a married man with greying hair. Even though I’m not trying to date these women! I often talk to men kinda like this! It’s called be sociable. Quite often the younger women will actually flirt back as I’m so far out of range it’s safe. The women my own age will flirt if interested and if not they will close off. Some will close down. Guys I try to joke with sometimes just don’t have the skills and will get defensive and close down. That’s life, people have varying social skills. Hell, some kids were wading through the stream at the back of my house yesterday and as I was gardening I told them there were sharks and crocodiles. They walked by in stunned silence and ignored me. Felt a bit of a dad-joke dik but truth be told they probably have slightly autistic, dumbass parents and don’t have the experience with confident and sociable adults.

It’s a mindset of openness and enthusiasm which if you carry it off in life will get you many openings. It carried me through and let me bat well above my average with women. The only risk is sometimes you’ll be a bit self conscious as sometimes people don’t parlay back and you fall a bit flat. So what? It’s worth the effort.

As a single man this approach turns your whole life into cold approach. Wandering around dressed up in LV clothes walking up to broads going “Hi there” to me is a colossal waste of effort and isn’t a natural way to live. For the time you spent you could have just worked the day and hired an escort in the evening. If you’re doing it to get laid it’s a lousy return.
This.

The major difference between a social dude and a socially akward one is that for the former approach comes naturally.

It's like asking dude who loves to workout tp drop and do 10 push ups versus a couch potato. The gym dude will do it like it's nothing, while couch potato will feel like his soul leaves his body. If you are never social but suddenly you wanna be Mr Mack Daddy....doesn't work that way.

A normal looking dude with good verbal game will have the advantage over a good-looking dude with no verbal game.

At least, here in not-so-superficial Europe. How the situation is different in shallow America I don't know, probably more your expertise.
Perhaps we may conclude that looks are more important to men who feel like looks are more important.

I said it before in this thread: https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/wanna-date-successfully-date-down.280907/

A happy ,fulfilling life where it's not 24/7 about looks, frame and where a man can be a human being might NOT necessarily be able with the hb8,5 twerking queen . But the hb6,5 on the other hand..

I see countless couples just vibing. Ofcourse you never know what happens behind closed doors, but it makes a lotta sense that dating down might be the key to most men.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Perhaps we may conclude that looks are more important to men who feel like looks are more important.
I think there's a limit to how good you can look when you're not good looking (unless you want to go down the cosmetic surgery way, which I would advice against unless you're seriously deformed). Similarly, shaping your body has a limit, unless you go to steroids and bodybuilding, which (sad to say for those gymmaxxers) is not attractive to most women.

There's no limit on verbal game though. Regardless what you look like. And your verbal game can easily overcome shortcomings like not being tall or muscular. I know actual midgets who have great game, but that's logical. They accepted their shortcomings and focus on traits that have nothing to do with their height.

This is why I rate verbal game higher than looksmaxxing. It's a body/mind thing. There's a limit to changing your body and face, but there's no limit to your verbal game except the boundaries of your mind.
 
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