Anyone find direct game less effective?

[Glassguy]

You will have to go and get her

No you dont.

She could check you out from afar, think you are attractive and desirable but she will sit and wait to see if you will come and take her.

I agree with this and I will explain in a moment

Women based on their sexual nature want to be taken and let the Man have his way if he bring that strong masculine vibe to the table.

Agree with this too

This is what it comes down to:

1.) You DO have to show interest in a woman (not all the time but normally yes).
2.) Once you have shown your interest, a high interest woman attracted to you WILL pursue you. I dont buy anything else because I see it happening (and to me).
3.) I am super direct in what I want. I just dont chase it.

Think of it as dealing with a mouse.

You set the trap. You bait it. Then what do you do? Do you sit there and watch all day for that mouse to come take the bait and eventually get caught in the trap? Noooo....

You simply walk away. That mouse, if interested enough in the bait, will come for it. Your physique, your personality, social status, etc. is the bait. Both real life and social media.

I have a current rotation of 3. I dont like 4 because I dont have the time to spend even just a little on 4 different women. I am getting ready to drop one off and bring one on. But 3 is my sweet spot.

Pursuing can in fact be done (with the right frame) and be totally ok. For all intents and purposes of this forum, the bulk of men have really weak/beta frames. So pursuing in general will get them chasing in short matter of time.

My directness: "Get over here asap and wear that cute little sundress........and you'd better not be wearing panties when you arrive".

As far as new dating candidates that you dont know: You hit the nail on the head. Understanding IOIs and how to handle them is the first step. But it still goes back to showing some interest, setting the trap and walking away.

That is a hard thing to do if you do not have other options that you are sexually involved with.

Women do like directness. They do want led. You cant physically lead something that you are pursuing/chasing. Its impossible.

You can still be direct and show intent. Its what you do after that which makes the difference.

 

[Glassguy]

That's good, but it sounds like these girls already know you, if they're on your Facebook. Once a girl is hooked, she will generally initiate. The question would be how did you first meet, what was the initial interaction?

Nope. I can show you 2 examples of chicks that I have never known or met that added me on fb in the last week that are chasing hard.

 

[apotheosis]

Nope. I can show you 2 examples of chicks that I have never known or met that added me on fb in the last week that are chasing hard.

random girls just add you on facebook and start messaging/chasing you? You must be a very handsome dude in which case, none of this 'game' stuff is relevant to you (you don't need it) and nobody will be able to recreate your results lol

 

[Glassguy]

random girls just add you on facebook and start messaging/chasing you? You must be a very handsome dude in which case, none of this 'game' stuff is relevant to you (you don't need it) and nobody will be able to recreate your results lol

I would consider myself an above average looking guy. Granted I had some mutual friends on fb with these chicks.

I will speculate that they:

See me as a recommended friend
Look at what is not private on my fb page
Send me a friend request on fb
Further look at my pics, info, etc once they are friends.
That sparks their interest and they send me a message. Its normally Hey , You look familiar, do we know each other?, etc.

If you look at my posts on here they all put self improvement high on my list. Focusing on what you can control and not what you cant.

I firmly believe that if you are not getting these types of women who are reaching out to you then you need to look in the mirror.

 

[illstep]

Handsome dudes do get friend requests on FB and DM's on insta and stuff. Just the way it goes.
Good for them tbh
I know a few legit male model looking dudes in their 20's, and they get hit up by some absolute stunners! (like super hot teen girls who most guys would kill to bang lol)

 

[Medina]

Still waiting for someone--anyone--can explain to me how going after what you want is in anyway feminine. And standing back and waiting to be 'chosen' is masculine lol. But OK.

But anyway, I don't think Direct or Indirect are really useful distinctions. It all comes down to subcomms--body language, eye contact, tonality, nonreactiveness, self-amusement, etc. You can have those talking about the weather, or you can have those telling a girl you think she's hot and want her to meet you. You can even have those standing against a wall not opening anybody, though you'll be less noticeable and have less opportunity to demonstrate those traits.

No girls gonna think, Wow, this guy would've been sooo hot if only he hadn't approached me (because only the most sexually aggressive girls or those below your league will typically approach YOU). The very act of approaching demonstrates:

1. You feel entitled to her--so you've probably had girls as hot as her or hotter in the past.
2. You don't care about the opinions of your social environment--which means you've probably gotten good reactions in the past.
3. Your aren't worried about anyone in her group--which means your frame is more dominant than there's.

If your subcomms back that up, you're congruent and you'll get attraction. But if your subcomms are weak, you're incongruent and you'll be blown out. The words you say don't matter much (if at all).

The game has changed because society has changed

Women have a dozen apps for attention wh0ring now, their inboxes are full of thirsty men, they get validated in some form or another every single day

So what happens when she meets a guy who doesnt do this?

It makes her become feminine again. Because she slips into a submissive "please validate me" state. Instead of a high self esteem "oh look another dude who thinks im amazing" state.

Its another thing social media has ruined

 

[zekko]

I can't help but get the feeling guys here are talking about like three different things.

Still waiting for someone--anyone--can explain to me how going after what you want is in anyway feminine. And standing back and waiting to be 'chosen' is masculine lol. But OK.

Yeah, I mean it's one thing to say that women will approach high value men, or that the best strategy is to let them pick you up, or that picking women up is bad because it validates them.
It's another entirely to say that picking up a girl is feminine.

1.) You DO have to show interest in a woman (not all the time but normally yes).
2.) Once you have shown your interest, a high interest woman attracted to you WILL pursue you. I dont buy anything else because I see it happening (and to me).
3.) I am super direct in what I want. I just dont chase it.

You seem to be saying two different things at once. You're saying you don't have to go get girls, but you're also saying that normally, yes, you have to show the initial interest in a woman. I mean, that last bit is game, you set the hook and let her know you're interested. Then let her do the chasing, that's nothing new there. And that is very different from sitting around doing nothing waiting for a woman to pick you up.

 

[Glassguy]

I can't help but get the feeling guys here are talking about like three different things.


Yeah, I mean it's one thing to say that women will approach high value men, or that the best strategy is to let them pick you up, or that picking women up is bad because it validates them.
It's another entirely to say that picking up a girl is feminine.


You seem to be saying two different things at once. You're saying you don't have to go get girls, but you're also saying that normally, yes, you have to show the initial interest in a woman. I mean, that last bit is game, you set the hook and let her know you're interested. Then let her do the chasing, that's nothing new there. And that is very different from sitting around doing nothing waiting for a woman to pick you up.

Making interest know and PURSUING are 2 totally different things. You dont see the difference?

 

[zekko]

Making interest know and PURSUING are 2 totally different things. You dont see the difference?

Sure. I'm just trying to clarify what people are saying. Some seem to be suggesting doing nothing and letting women pick you up.
That's an entirely different thing from expressing your interest first, because in that case the man is the initiator. After that the women should pursue. But men are generally still the initiators.

I've seen so many guys here say that they do nothing, or that they "ignore women", and that's their strategy. But if you press them further, they will admit they actually approached and got the number. Well, duh. That's not doing nothing, or ignoring women. That's expressing interest. If after doing so, you lay back and let her come to you, that's very common, and nothing new.

Guys sitting back and expecting women to pick them up, that's new, even though it happens. It just doesn't happen consistently enough for most guys to go with that strategy.

 

[Glassguy]

Some seem to be suggesting doing nothing

When exactly did I say that? Please quote.

Showing intent is doing something. Inviting them to meet for drinks IS doing something....showing intent.

After that the women should pursue. But men are generally still the initiators.

If a woman's interest is high enough, she will pursue. If its not, its a waste of time anyways trying to advance with her.

Guys sitting back and expecting women to pick them up, that's new, even though it happens. It just doesn't happen consistently enough for most guys to go with that strategy.

Like I said, you have to attract for that to happen. Certainly not all guys can do that.

If I show interest, invite her for a drink and she is texting me 3:1, who is pursuing?

 

[cheyne]

Handsome dudes do get friend requests on FB and DM's on insta and stuff. Just the way it goes.
Good for them tbh
I know a few legit male model looking dudes in their 20's, and they get hit up by some absolute stunners! (like super hot teen girls who most guys would kill to bang lol)

I wanna come back as your friends in the next life!!

 

[Glassguy]

It just doesn't happen consistently enough for most guys to go with that strategy.

Good point- most guys sit around and do nothing and expect results. Women, finances, etc.

Those guys that put time into bettering themselves (socially, financially, health) will see a tremendous improvement in how often they are approached. But it takes hard work and that is the deal breaker for most lazy people.

Note I didnt say putting time into chasing women. Them pursuing the guy is the byproduct of the hard work them put into themselves.

 

[illstep]

I wanna come back as your friends in the next life!!

lol, I think we all do. You need to hit the genetic lottery though if you expect complete strangers to approach you.
Just having a really good job and being healthy etc ain't gonna cut much ice, i'm afraid ESPECIALLY with the really young, hot ones who don't care about money and tend to just bang the good looking dead beats, at least here in my part of the UK lol

 

[In2theGame]

3.) I am super direct in what I want. I just dont chase it.

This line sums it up in terms what you and I are saying. I agree with you then when you are talking about pursuing in the sense of chasing. I do not believe it chasing a Woman (Texting her constantly, Always initiating contact, Continuously trying to get her out on a date etc.) This I agree with 100%. What I was talking about is the initial approach/attraction aspect of things. Say if a guy is out with his friends and he see's a girl that catches his eye, he should go and make a direct approach and let her know his intentions and what he thinks about her. After that, If he's chasing her and putting in more effort than she is, Then that right there is a sign that he has to let that chick go and find Women who really want him.

 

[Glassguy]

This line sums it up in terms what you and I are saying. I agree with you then when you are talking about pursuing in the sense of chasing. I do not believe it chasing a Woman (Texting her constantly, Always initiating contact, Continuously trying to get her out on a date etc.) This I agree with 100%. What I was talking about is the initial approach/attraction aspect of things. Say if a guy is out with his friends and he see's a girl that catches his eye, he should go and make a direct approach and let her know his intentions and what he thinks about her. After that, If he's chasing her and putting in more effort than she is, Then that right there is a sign that he has to let that chick go and find Women who really want him.

agreed

But even in a direct approach, I would have a quick intro, a small amount of chit chat and then pull the number and move on.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I can show you screenshots of fb messages from younger women engaging me. 3 in the past week.

They are very direct. I blew off a 22 yr old and she totally blew up my phone for 2 days wanting to fvck. Mindfvcked the daylights out of her that I just stopped responding to her.

If you are attracting, they are pursuing. If you're not, you're pursuing.

Guess who has the most power?

I don't find it feminine nor attractive. Not saying I wont smash. I am saying, my **** won't suck itself.

Its not something you can make into a system. You can looks max. Its still not systematic. Hence why i cannot stress enough that importance of game competency and ability to cold approach. It set's guys apart. It separate the men from the boys.

Women hit me up on social media. All i see is low hanging fruit. As it, not special. Chick swinging from one cawk to the next.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

agreed

But even in a direct approach, I would have a quick intro, a small amount of chit chat and then pull the number and move on.

There's again the variation of direct /indirect. I suspect Op and i were talking going Direct from Go. She has not deserve nor warranted anything complimentary.

From your approach, it still gives to reason, she won you over > simping from Go. Theirs far too much beta thirst. Simping and cuck.

I enjoy flipping the script. Playing plausible deniability. Seeding from indirect, man to woman, and going for the pull. Seedling ambiguity. Its dread game. That willingness to walk away and of course options.

In either event, if its not broken, don't fix it.

This line sums it up in terms what you and I are saying. I agree with you then when you are talking about pursuing in the sense of chasing. I do not believe it chasing a Woman (Texting her constantly, Always initiating contact, Continuously trying to get her out on a date etc.) This I agree with 100%. What I was talking about is the initial approach/attraction aspect of things. Say if a guy is out with his friends and he see's a girl that catches his eye, he should go and make a direct approach and let her know his intentions and what he thinks about her. After that, If he's chasing her and putting in more effort than she is, Then that right there is a sign that he has to let that chick go and find Women who really want him.

007 is a woman. Portman is thor. Its girl power on tren. Excuse me while I puke.

I prefer kicking dumpty off her pedestal. Trolling as a hobby. Bait and switch. Merge sets. Role play. Setup a bunch of fake relationships and pull. At no one time is there any chasing or anything solid with respect to my commitment. Plain enough i broke the ice. I am not validating her outside takin my ****kkk out and telling her to take her clothes off.

There's direct but once she has earned the right.

 

[illstep]

I suspect Op and i were talking going Direct from Go. She has not deserve nor warranted

Yeah, that's what I meant in terms of 'direct'.

I notice that the consensus seems to be cyclical in the industry. It's actually kind of fascinating lol. We have 3 months or so where every PUA coach and PUA forum is advocating opening indirect with an opinion openers or something, hiding your intent to some extent (until she is giving you huge IOI's), being aloof etc, and then it just seems to 'flip'and the consensus is about opening and being super direct from the get-go, showing your cards. ''Be masculine and vulnerable!'' etc.

It flips every few months, and it's been that way since the mysterymethod days, i'm sure!

At the moment, direct is very much in vogue, every PUA site/blog/forum I read', ''Game'' = walking up too a girl, telling her you noticed her and that you think she's hot/cute, and then seeing if she's feeling it or not. If not, walk away to the next hot girl and try again

I'm just saying that, for me, i've started to notice that direct doesn't seem to give me the best results. I'm aware that this is likely down to the fact i'm in the UK, combined with the (possibly more important) fact that, i'm not the most handsome dude there is.

I thought about this a lot last weekend where I made out with (unfortunately couldn't close) one of the hottest girls of my life. Way younger than me, and my idea of a 9. I really strongly feel that a direct approach on her would have gotten me a pretty rough rejection, but in being indirect and 'friendly' and hiding my intent intially and building a connection throughout the night and familiarity and playfulness etc, I feel I was able to amplify that small amount of attraction that she had for me. (And since she kissed me, i'm sure that the intial attraction WAS there, but it would have been bordlerine at best, and not high enough to NOT get rejected if i'd have opened and told her she was hot and made her decide then and there whether she was interested)

 

[zekko]

When exactly did I say that? Please quote.

I never said you said that, I said some seem to be saying that (doing nothing gets them girls). It's hard to say because some posts are rather vague, and then they don't follow up. I'm clear on what you're saying now, and it makes complete sense.

Good point- most guys sit around and do nothing and expect results. Women, finances, etc.

Those guys that put time into bettering themselves (socially, financially, health) will see a tremendous improvement in how often they are approached. But it takes hard work and that is the deal breaker for most lazy people.

These guys that advocate "doing nothing", I don't think that excludes self improvement. I think it's more like "I go into the gym and get ripped, then go out and women approach me because I have a top 5% body", that sort of thing. Sort of like when you say the girls found you on FB, I'd count that as "doing nothing", even though I'm sure you've put in a lot of work on self improvement.

With Corey Wayne, he says you should go out and have fun, and display such a fun vibe that girls will naturally be drawn to you and approach you. Maybe that's where some of this is coming from.

 

[Black Widow Void]

I think a lot has to do with social calibration. When experimenting with some of the tips (and I go as far back as reading news groups in the 1990's) I ran into some trial and error. What I personally learned is that if you are too direct and you haven't totally built a certain rapport, it's more doomed to fail.

As far as looks, I'm self-objective enough to realize that I'm just not as sharp looking as I was twenty five years ago. If I wasn't aware of this, my ratio of women that approach me these days is sure to validate my claim.
Anyway... with things like this in mind, it's up to us to shift gears and accentuate the attributes that we still posses. I can no longer go on auto-pilot as often as in the past. I now have to 'peacock' a little and for me, that includes warmth and communication. Had I not 'reinvented' myself a little, my numbers would be much lower.