Anyone else get bored easily with their g/f? (advice please!!)

[kdnash82]

Here's the situation. It never fails. Every single time, it's the same thing and it feels like a continuous cycle in my life.

I meet a girl. Thing are going good. I'm enjoying the sex. I enjoy the quality time we spend together. Overall, things are amazing. Even to the point where I start thinking, "Maybe I can spend the rest of my life with this girl."

Then I get to the point where I think, "I do wanna spend the rest of my life with this girl." At that very moment something triggers in my head. I instantly wanna run away from my relationship with this girl. I don't want anything to do with her. I start looking for other women. I find other women. I bang other women. Things feel good again, but in the back of my head, I still have my girlfriend.

I blow her off and blow her off to the point where she's had enough and doesn't want to be with me anymore. I'm crushed. I want things to go back to the way they use to be. I actually start craving that girl again. Needing her back in my life. Hoping that she will come back to me. During this period, all the girls that I was banging while I was with her suddenly don't wanna talk to me anymore. I go through a phase where I'm not getting any azz on a regular basis. I become a club/bar/party rat again. I start to wish that I had never started messing around on my now ex girlfriend.

Anyone else every go through something like this? I've gone through this about 3 times in my life now. It's the same every single time. The reason I'm asking is because I feel like I'm about to go down this road again. I haven't stepped out on my girl, but we are about to move in with eachother. I suddenly feel that I don't wanna be in a relationship. I'm already thinking about the azz that I will be giving up. My bomb azz bachelor pad that would always impress the ladies. Being able to just decide that I'm going out to the club and not have to explain that it's a guys night out and that she's not invited. I'm actually scared here guys!!!

 

[nicknle]

Is that fancy car worth the time and effort (money) you're going to spend on it?
Same thing here, is the girl worth the independence you're going to give up? If you think she is, or at least might be, it's worth the risk. You can always go back to being single.

 

[xo_NeSaLiiCiiOuS_xo]

Don't Do Anything Stupid...think Before You Act..think Who Your Going To Hurt..think,is This Worth It..does She Make You Happy,does She Make You Have Butterflys When Your With Her..think About What Your Going To Regret..think About Your Future, Do You See Her In Your Future?make A Change Now, Make This Relationship Different..don't Make It The Same As The Others, Because Then Maybe It Will Work.

 

[nicknle]

Don't Do Anything Stupid...think Before You Act..think Who Your Going To Hurt..think,is This Worth It..does She Make You Happy,does She Make You Have Butterflys When Your With Her..think About What Your Going To Regret..think About Your Future, Do You See Her In Your Future?make A Change Now, Make This Relationship Different..don't Make It The Same As The Others, Because Then Maybe It Will Work.

Terrible advice, you can't know all these things in advance, there's only so much you can predict. Go with the flow, if you don't like the flow, get out. Simple as that.

 

[DavenJuan]

its soooo easy for everyone to tell you whats wrong here yet none of it matters...so get ready for these responses...

" dude, your only 25 and thinking about moving in with your girl..live your life"

" find out who you are first, be true to yourself and make yourself happy before you expect someone else to"

" you want all the other azz and not ready to settle down"

...honestly i dont know what the answer is ...what i do know is i go through this myself from time to time. maybe the answer really is finding out what we REALLY want out of life.

We get bored and look for excuses to subconcsiously mess things up in are relationships, and the minutre its over, we ask ourselves what went wrong.

i dont know what the answer is, but i think that us atleast acknowledging this repeated process is a step towards bettering ourselves not just our relationships.

 

[Epic]

Maybe you're just afraid of commitment subconsciously or something. I know from the relationships that I've had that there comes a point where they don't really excite you anymore. You don't have that feeling that you had when you first got together. Do you and your girl have anything in common? It could be that you're attracted to these girls and think you want to be with them just because of the rush you get from a new chick, but once that wears off you realize that you don't have fun with her and you move on. If that's the case all I can tell you is to be more picky.

 

[kdnash82]

DavenJuan and Epic-

You too seem to understand my situation the most. Good advice. I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks this way. Thanks.

Anyone else have any ideas? What about you married guys out there? How did you all feel about when you were ready to get serious, then wanted to pull out after going through everything with your girlfriend? Any last minute thought while at the alter? Instead of a runaway bride, any pull a runaway groom?

Thoughts and ideas are greatly appreciated.

 

[Epic]

You know I don't know if this helps any, but my girlfriend and I both had a time where we weren't sure if we really wanted to be with each other. I don't know exactly how she felt, but I felt like maybe she wasn't for me or that maybe I could do better. I realized though that I was just freaking out because at that point we were talking about making things more serious. We had begun conversations about marriage and we were thinking about moving in together. Even though we both participated in those conversations once they were over with we both experienced some doubt. Once we were open with each other about that we decided it was too soon for that and we backed off. After that my feelings changed and I knew I still wanted to be with her. See what it comes down to is that even though I feel very strongly about her, I'm still not ready to take that step. Maybe you are just moving too fast for yourself in these relationships and your fear is causing you to lose interest so you have a way out. Like I said maybe it isn't the case with you, but it's something to consider.