Blacksheep
Master Don Juan
Thats true man! I didnt expect myself to feel that way, but when the subject is relationship I still need to improve a lot as I see.Based on interacting with you in the past and your previous posts, I have to say I am surprised to hear you like this.
You are trying to escape the inevitable. You are not allowing yourself to grow from this experience. You need the pain. You don't deal with it, and worse by engaging in meaningless vices like video games, you embrace it and allow it to show you a new version of yourself.
You are effectively choosing to only view the negatives. That is a path you do not want to go down.
Be patient. Be kind to yourself. Be wise about how you view this experience.
PS: In my experience, when this has happened to me, being coupled up inside made it worse. Spend time outside (hikes, walks, road trips, travel, sports, etc, etc). In other words, be active.
Modern Man Advice
The good is that, I was very sad yesterday but today I could put my mood up and things are getting more clear. I just embrace that this takes times and its ok to feel sad for a while... But I have to move on.
And also, I was the one paying everything on weekends because she didnt had a job yet. I was giving her love, attention and time. And she gave me what? She told bullsh1t about me on my back to her family like a gossiper and to her gay friend. Didnt commit to what we had agree on our relationship.
I should not be feeling sad for breaking up.
And btw, thanks for your support man! Really apreciate it.