Any DJs with ADD?

[ted]

I just found out that I have ADD. It seems to be the biggest reason for my failure with women. It effects aspects of attention, conversation, and almost everything else involved in trying to make new relationships. Does anyone else have ADD?
I found this site and it was a revelation. However, I can't get past the point of the first meeting. I either screw it up when calling or I don't even ask for a number because I feel I will screw it up. I've had moments when women were hanging on every word I said or they give me that gazing look when their pupils dialate when talking to me. Ienjoy being able to do this now(thanks to this site) but I want to be able to progress further and date a few women at the same time so I can pick the one I really like. I was always afraid that I would fall in love with the wrong person and she would rip my heart out. This has happened but I don't want it to become a pattern. Any advice on Djing with ADD?

 

[FlyGuy]

TONS of people have ADD to one degree or another. Its a side-effect of living in the information age. Growing up with TV, video games, etc. all contribute to a short attention span. Not everyone has a severe case, in which it truly would interfere with relationships. If you have a severe case then you need to see a psychologist and try to overcome the disorder.

 

[Jvesti]

dude sorry but i think you are a making an excuse for your add for your dealings with women. It sounds like your issues have nothing to do with what you have at all.

People with ADDHD or have it as a genetic reason (not referring to those that have short attention spans for other reasons.) are novelty seeking, risk takers, impulsive, and aggressive. I find it natural for someone with ADD to get bored sticking around just one woman. People with ADDHD tend to have more sexual partners than average because of these qualities.

ALTHOUGH, I can say that society isn't made for those with ADDHD. We are hunters in a farmer's world and farmer's school. Read "The Edison Gene" by Thom Hartmann it is fascinating stuff and you can understand what i mean.

From school, we are made to believe we are the bad seeds because we don't sit still and obey the teacher. We are looked upon as the dumb kids because we don't do well in schooling designed for a certain type of people. Even though those with ADD have very high IQ compared to the public.

It's tough to grow socially when your reality is everyone is different than you. And you are looked down upon by authority/teachers in the place you experience your social life.

This can certainly **** with someone's self esteem. It can make the person withdrawn and so on. This usually changes when the authority of childhood and our school system is lifted off our shoulders. It definitely did for me and I blew past everyone around me in succeeding esp in the social skills arena.

 

[Ebach]

I'm pretty sure I have ADD even though I haven't been diagnosed with it and wouldn't care if I was -- I wouldn't take any medication to get rid of it because I like myself the way I am; I don't care if society thinks I'm good enough. I like to live life to its fullest and too much attention spend on a single thing brings headaches. I like the rush.

 

[ted]

Actually I do have a very severe case. I've taken screening tests that say, for instance, if you score around 25 points you are likely to have it and I scored around 100! It has effected every arena of my life and has lead to bouts with depression and severe self esteem problems. It has also severely effected my work life (can't keep a job) and social life. I have very few friends and, as you may guess, I've had very few relationships.
It was sort of a revelation to find out about it, so I encourage anyone that thinks they may have it they should definitely find out about it.
I did have a screwed up childhood that would cause a normal kid problems later in life, but I am absolutely certain that ADD has severely effected my ability to overcome them.
I also know that it hurts my newly found DJ skills. I guess I am afraid that I can't keep a woman mesmerized beyond the first meeting since I do tend to space out at times and when I do, I can't keep a conversation going or start one for that matter.

 

[Jvesti]

Still man you're focused on why **** can't work, you should be focusing on how it can work. I think your problem is an issue with self image and confidence. You perceive yourself as not being able to do certain things cause of add therefore it is so.

I have one of the strongest cases of addhd imaginable but I use it to a benefit instead of a disadvantage. It's not necessarily a bad thing just ask Thomas Edison or Leonardo Da Vinci. I assess what benefits i have such as ability to use a racing mind to innovate and come up with ideas. Even be funny on the fly in a quick manner quicker than our slower mind counterparts. Also to use hyperfocus and the feeling of the hunt on certain goals i want to achieve.

I used to be well known by everyone for being hyperactive, impulsive and showing addhd like symptoms. In fact during my final year of high school, my teacher once evaluating me said that in all his 20 years of teaching has not seen a worse case of addhd.

The fact you can't start a convo or hold one is bs. It takes practice and being out there. Everyone sucks at first even as a listener. I suggest reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie which is one of the best books out there.

But as we can drift our attention we can hyperfocus in our attention when something interesting or when we realize its something we want such as "being in the girls pants".

Also you talk about fear of a girl ripping your heart out as something to do with add. it's not the case.

My advice: Get out there, practice, get that book, your add isn't the one limiting you, you are limiting you. Once you realize this a light will come on and you will achieve progress at lightning speed. Learn to relax in social situations and that happens with time and you will understand what people are saying better. and that's about it.