Any advice I can give a friend in his new relationship? Not getting ANYWHERE sexually

[SLSAMG]

So my friend has been in a relationship for about 3 months. It's taken him 2 months to actually make out with her. They have kissed, like pecks on the mouth, but have actually made out a handful of times and its taken him 2 entire months to get to that stage. When they do kiss, she wont let him grab ass or let his hands explore, hes been stuck at kissing this whole time.

Theyre both generally cheesy and just...cringe worthy together. They call each other up and say I love you a million times. Post hearts and lovey dovey stuff on each others Facebooks. He gives her love notes, leaves them on her car, flowers, etc. I dont know what to tell him, which is why I'm coming here.

When she goes to his house, they cuddle in his room and watch movies...and take naps together lol. So yeah, hes getting nowhere sexually, he doesnt take any action and his girl claims to want to take things slow. He just seems sexually unappealing

Anything I can do to help him out?

 

[Scars]

Is this a High School relationship by any chance?

-Scars

 

[SLSAMG]

Is this a High School relationship by any chance?

-Scars

No theyre both 20. I mean, theyre happy together and I guess thats what really matters. But there comes a point where things need to get sexual. She leaves him with blue balls all the time. She says if he presses for sex and she denies, and he continues pressing, she'll leave him.

She "respects" her body, and I actually find that admirable, but for the sake of my friend, im looking to give him advice

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Maybe it works for him. Who are you to judge?

 

[SLSAMG]

Maybe it works for him. Who are you to judge?

I'm not judging, he actually asked me for help/advice but I wasn't really sure what to tell him

 

[VladPatton]

Point him over to this site and let him read, read, read. With any iota of luck he'll unplug and take the red pill...that's about all you can do, man.

 

[SLSAMG]

Point him over to this site and let him read, read, read. With any iota of luck he'll unplug and take the red pill...that's about all you can do, man.

I think I'm going to go ahead and do that. I'm afraid he'll put all this info to use at once and change too much at once/freak her out lol

 

[alpha_ash]

I think I'm going to go ahead and do that. I'm afraid he'll put all this info to use at once and change too much at once/freak her out lol

Holy ****, my friend is in a similar situation lolll. Where are you located?

 

[SLSAMG]

Holy ****, my friend is in a similar situation lolll. Where are you located?

California lol

 

[Scars]

She says if he presses for sex and she denies, and he continues pressing, she'll leave him.

Sounds like she holds the frame right now. If it's that important to your friend then he should approach her and say, "Listen, I care about you a lot. I respect you and your body, but I am also a man, with NEEDS. I'm looking for a women that can care for me, as well as my needs. If you aren't the girl, then I guess we have to go our separate ways. No hard feelings." This will put the ball in his court. 3 months is a reasonable amount of time to start wanting sex. She'll then either give it up, or he'll stop wasting his time.

-Scars

 

[SLSAMG]

Sounds like she holds the frame right now. If it's that important to your friend then he should approach her and say, "Listen, I care about you a lot. I respect you and your body, but I am also a man, with NEEDS. I'm looking for a women that can care for me, as well as my needs. If you aren't the girl, then I guess we have to go our separate ways. No hard feelings." This will put the ball in his court. 3 months is a reasonable amount of time to start wanting sex. She'll then either give it up, or he'll stop wasting his time.

-Scars

This would be ideal but he would never say anything like this, no matter how hard I try to convince him. He's like her little puppet, he thinks she's perfect and tells her he's so lucky to have her and that he's thankful for her everyday.

Basically what I'm getting at is he would never challenge her the way you mentioned, he wouldn't dare go against her wishes of not wanting to have sex. I really don't know how she deals with a guy who acts this way

 

[dap]

This would be ideal but he would never say anything like this, no matter how hard I try to convince him. He's like her little puppet, he thinks she's perfect and tells her he's so lucky to have her and that he's thankful for her everyday.

He's too far gone for help, at least in this relationship. Any success for him is going to require that he get out of this situation and start fresh.

 

[Plutoman]

He's too far gone for help, at least in this relationship. Any success for him is going to require that he get out of this situation and start fresh.

This is my thought.

Most guys have to hit rock-bottom before they're willing to take the red pill and climb back up (so far as my experience goes).

Sounds like she isn't much of a catch, anyways. He can man-up later and find a new girl after he's ready to see the light.

 

[SLSAMG]

I kind of agree guys, hes done so much of this lovey dovey stuff that shes become accustomed to it. If he changes his ways it'll just be bad for them both. I guess this relationship will run its course, and if things dont work out ill be there for him

P.S. this girl actually is a really big catch, atleast in my opinion. Works 2 jobs, helps her family. 8/10 easily, killer body, on her way toward law school and a virgin. Rare as fuk, atleast in my world

 

[dap]

P.S. this girl actually is a really big catch, atleast in my opinion. Works 2 jobs, helps her family. 8/10 easily, killer body, on her way toward law school and a virgin. Rare as fuk, atleast in my world

And she's using your friend to validate herself. She has no interest in him. This is about her ego. Girls like this want a guy around just to prove they have one. When a real man shows up, she will drop your friend in an instant with no remorse. This will crush your friend. If I were you I'd try to get him out of this altogether, but I'm sure he won't listen til it's too late.

 

[Plutoman]

In the end, doesn't matter if she's a great catch if she's using the guy. Still ends up the same either way.

Tell him, after he goes through it all, to look on the bright side - if he can find one like that, he can find another. Well, maybe not the virgin part. But if he's going to take issue with that.. Well, there's a lot worse problems in the world.

 

[SLSAMG]

And she's using your friend to validate herself. She has no interest in him. This is about her ego. Girls like this want a guy around just to prove they have one. When a real man shows up, she will drop your friend in an instant with no remorse. This will crush your friend. If I were you I'd try to get him out of this altogether, but I'm sure he won't listen til it's too late.

Interesting. It seems like she does like him though.

She writes him love letters too, tells him she loves him, "omg I love him", gets all giddy around him, cheesy high school stuff even though they're adults.

Idk, I really wouldn't give 2 shts if he didn't come to me personally for help. You still think she's putting in a front just for her ego?

 

[Kbomb]

Interesting. It seems like she does like him though.

She writes him love letters too, tells him she loves him, "omg I love him", gets all giddy around him, cheesy high school stuff even though they're adults.

Idk, I really wouldn't give 2 shts if he didn't come to me personally for help. You still think she's putting in a front just for her ego?

Doesn't matter. When another man comes into her life that knows how to push those deep instinctual buttons all this other stuff goes out the window. He obviously isn't doing that and on a longer timeline it all falls apart.

 

[SLSAMG]

Doesn't matter. When another man comes into her life that knows how to push those deep instinctual buttons all this other stuff goes out the window. He obviously isn't doing that and on a longer timeline it all falls apart.

Makes sense, thanks.

I had a feeling this relationship wouldn't last a considerable amount of time, but I'll just let them have fun and be there if things go south

 

[SLSAMG]

Also what exactly do you mean by "deep instinctual buttons"?