I've often wondered why men would resort to suicide. I've tried putting myself in their shoes, and I could not think of a logical reason.
It just escapes me. In my mind all I could think is; how selfish that a man endowed with natural talents and the ability to influence other men would leave this world using the cowards way out.
We men r biologically created to fight and survive the harshest of conditions but yet our greatest weakness is our minds.
In the end, our principles in life is what differentiates us all.
In the end it's how we think that matters.
My best friend killed himself with a plastic bag in 2011. It's a week after his 21 birthday.
He was my soulmate. We would always be together and even dress the same without consulting each other (it sounds gay but it happened ALOT), we finished each other sentences. We joked, trained, chased skirt, gamed, studied together.
A real bro.
You know what else? He was a real babe magnet (all the girls were after him), He was the définition of a Superman (he was 180lb, 6packs, thin, stanned... he could run 50km, he benchedpressed 300lbs, his bicep contracted had 2 bumps and size of my head... he trained 3 hours every 2 days at home: self weight and he did 3 session of muay Thai a week at competitive level, he passed all "survival in the woods" test)... Now, while he was a babe-magnet and physical machine.. He got rejected at the first English MD school but 1 week later we was accepted at the best French MD school (medical school). The letter came 1 week to late. He already ended his life. Leaving only a note
Found out, it had been his 3rd try.
Once after a breakup with his Girlfriend (Ex) at 18 years old where they had a messed up relationship: open relationship, needy, always fighting.
2nd with his grand father WW2 gun at around 20. He called a goodfriend of his that day. The friend became my good friend after the funerals.
3rd. He succeeded with a plastic bag. The day he did it a thought came to my head if he had done it.
He was on Xanax for bipolar. He was "perfect" but he was messed up inside and came from a wealthy but real broken down family.
Alot of people who performs including myself.. Do it to avoid looking inside. Often the people you see and admire or those "perfect" are the most fragile inside.
All my life I admired him and wanted to be "as great" , I was lucky to being born in a "good family" that what saved me.
We all know failure... but when you put yourself at the rope to succeed and fail... you explode.
I've passed the past 7 years to heal myself inside (my inner) and be as strong as him (both physically and mental). It remains, I know I am fragile but I act and respect my limit: pushing them every day.
In our society: alot of people including me have to work 12 hours a day, commute 3 hours, feed a family, handle kids and gf/wife, deal with family and friends, and ever increasing debt/gaz price/food price/house price.. With a salary/income that doesn't keep up with inflation or mental state. At work, we always have to do more and better with less and for less while life happens without care
