Another nice failure(lesson) here/real chat convo included!

[Viking25]

Well..DJs...you can't find reading like this in a freaking library! I fukked up with this one very nice. I need your opinions,suggestions or plain observations.Whatever helps!To give you some background. I met this chik,we spent one week seeing eachother every day!..It was right before New years day..and I asked her out for new years,to which she initially said YES. Then she changed her plans and decided to spend new years with some of her friends. So ,me after being ditched like that,decided to play hard to get and when she called I would keep conversations short and kinda trying to make her guilty a bit.She was asking me to ask her on a date to witch I responed " yeah..we should do something".I didn't want to givce her the message that she can ditch me the last minute and then expect me to come up with a date and take her out at her request! ( seems to be right move?)
After few days of me not expressing too much interest in her,she stopped calling. And here's the what happened next
ME: but hey can I ask you seriously....did you lose interest in me? cuz we went from getting together everyday to no contact in two weeks. The only reason I can think of is that you completely lost interest.
Her: well, remember when i called you that morning to tell you that i thought we should back off on the physical stuff?
ME: yeah
HER: i just wanted to really sort out how i was feeling about you, and the thing is that i still wanted to get to know you as a person, and figure out if i would still be interested in you romantically without all the kissing and stuff influencing my descision....
ME: i wanted some space but i felt like after the new years thing you were mad at me...
HER: i tried to keep in touch but you seemed kinda short...
ME: well...that makes sense
Her: i tried to initiate with you and get you to initiate with me but you wouldn't set anything up...
I see....I really appreciate by the way you telling me all this
Her: i even asked you at one point to just ask me out properly if you wanted to spend time with me, but you just kept saying "yeah we'll do something"...
HEr: so i have to be honest Martin, I've put dating you out of the picture by now...
ME: hm...this is gold
Her: i still want to know you, but i just don't see us going anywhere romantically... i'm sorry, i just didn't want to lead you on
ME: honesty is always good
HER: do you still wanna try to be friends at least? ... you don't have to if you don't want to
Her: i think you're a great guy, and i like that we have so many things in common so that's why i suggested the friend idea... but if that's to weird i'll understand
ME: well..see with friends thing, it doesn't work out if one person wants more out of relationship then the other,I can't be friends with you...because I see you as more then a friend. It's too bad you missread all the signs about me being mad or distant...I wasn't mad at you or even upset...just didn't feel well at the time.
I really really did like you and the thing is, I didn't want to **** it up by spending too much time with you...and trying to give you your space...but I guess you took it as a sing of disinterest.
ME: good lesson to say the least
HER: no, i appreciated it... i just don't think my heart was in it...
HER: i'm sorry i hurt you, i really thought that if i gave us some time apart, and apart from all the physical stuff that maybe romantic feelings would grow for you out of just spending time together....
ME: well...it's always good to learn something new..so it's all good
HER: but i don't think trying to force a spark where there isn't one is the right thing to do...
HER: you deserve better than that
ME: well..we didn't really spend time together
ME: oh yeah..I agree....just wanted to get your side of the story
HER: i knew that having this conversation might be the end of knowing you alltogether... but i didn't want to put off the conversation any longer
ME: ok...now I know
HER: so if you don't want to talk anymore i understand, i'll miss our chats
ME: so, I guess, sex is out of question now?
HER: yeah
HER: so...
ME: so...yeah...sex is out of question.
HER: so is this goodbye for me and you?
ME: well..never said hello..really
HER: that's not fair
HER: i never went into this expecting it to not work out
HER: for what it's worth, i never regretted meeting you, buying you that silly book, or any of the time we did spent together..

Well..bu not giving her my full attention I fukked it up. Now I am not sure how to play this one out. I kinda want another chance at her "goods"first,but if that fails I wanna stay friends with her. She has tons of good looking friends and I am not hurt here anyway.I had fun and didn't get attached. So what do yah think DJ?

 

[Faze]

ME: so, I guess, sex is out of question now?
HER: yeah
HER: so...
ME: so...yeah...sex is out of question.

I don't think this was the best thing to say to her...

Also you shouldn't have been seeing her every day for a week. You should have played a little more hard to get from the beggining.

It was also AFCish to ask her if she lost interest in you. Best idea now is to NEXT her and move on.

 

[Viking25]

The "so I guess sex is out of question" was a freaking joke...I got sense of humor ! As far as NEXTing the girl before she opens her mouth and has a chance to explain everything and I have a chance to learn from my mistakes. Plus, anyone can NEXT girl,doesn't take a freaking skill to do it. What takes skill is come back from this and get some action. Or just learn from your mistakes.
But keep them coming DJ...we all gotta learn and help eachother out. (And I don't mean that in a gay way) ..hehe

 

[Rondavu]

anyone can NEXT girl,doesn't take a freaking skill to do it. What takes skill is come back from this and get some action.

This is an obvious rationalization. It's another way of saying I don't want to admit to myself that it's time to quit. Why don't you just scream the word desperate out your kitchen window? I'm not trying to 5hit on you. I just think your telling yourself whatever you wanna hear cause you feel the poon slipping away. Don't grasp at it man. Just get better at creating more opportunities and you won't have to stoop to the level of challenging yourself to get play from a woman who told you straight out that she felt no spark. Listen to yourself. Just assess what you did wrong while you were spending time with her and do better next time. As for the sex joke, I can appreciate your sense of humor as good as any. The thing is timing is everything and you picked a bad time. Besides, that 5hit sounded like you were Larry straight out of threes company buffering a rejection by asking for sex. Tell her a knock knock joke next time. Then again don't do that either.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Bro your NOT going to get anything from this chick now. Let's review your critical mistakes:


-spending EVERY DAY together for a week!!! That's a big no-no!! I realize if there's a vibe there and you guys are hitting it off its easy to want to spend time together, but that time apart is where attraction REALLLY grows!!

-asking her if she lost interest- That's AFC to the MAX!! That tells her how insecure you are about how she views you!! Not good!!

Look she did change plans on you at the last minute for New Year's but she DID counter offer by telling you to set up a date. Girls like MEN, not wussies. She was telling you she was interested by saying let's set up a date.


Don't get TOO caught up in playing everything by the "rules" you've learned. You can't just say, "Ok she changed plans on me, so now I'm going to act disinterested." That's lame!! What you should have done was set up a date, see how she reacted to you and then you could have judged if she was interested in you by her actions. Remember bro, its much better to to communicate non-verbally than to ask questions.



PIMP

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

The biggest mistake DJ's make is trying to act disinterested in the first few weeks to increase her interest level -- you guys push this way too far and it usually backfires!

I think people want to spend time with people they know very well to celebrate new years - so i wouldn't have taken this too personal. However, if she was interested in you even if you acted aloof after new years ten days of not doing anything is not what broke the camels back -- hell she saw you 7 out of 20 days.

You may have given her an excuse to go after some other dj she was eyeing and now is blaming your aloofness as the cause -- rubbish - don't believe the hype!

She thinks you only want sex and not her! Maybe she doesn't like guys like this - players.

She doesn't like the way you kiss or smell!

She thinks you were acting like a baby and wants a man who is
not so easily hurt.

Men pursue women and not the other way around -- she got offended that you did not take her proposition seriously - that she wanted a proper date.

She wants a relationship and after 7 tries with you she has decided that you are not the one -- or maybe she was on the edge of interest and was waiting to be impressed further by you after new years but lost interest due to lack of interaction and thus based her decision solely on the first week experiences


Never chase a girl when she tells you to quit chasing her -- this makes a man look foolish - and she starts telling her friends of your desperation.

my 234,568,752 cents.

 

[Satan Psycho]

Originally posted by Viking25
I met this chik,we spent one week seeing eachother every day!..It was right before New years day..and I asked her out for new years,to which she initially said YES. Then she changed her plans and decided to spend new years with some of her friends.

Believe me, it has occurred to her that you are more available to her than she is to you on New Year's Eve.

Originally posted by Viking25
So ,me after being ditched like that,decided to play hard to get and when she called I would keep conversations short and kinda trying to make her guilty a bit.

Basically acting like a baby, or worse, a girl! So you wanted her to think you were disinterested? Mad? Which one?

Originally posted by Viking25
She was asking me to ask her on a date to witch I responed " yeah..we should do something".I didn't want to givce her the message that she can ditch me the last minute and then expect me to come up with a date and take her out at her request! ( seems to be right move?)
After few days of me not expressing too much interest in her,she stopped calling. And here's the what happened next

What exactly were you waiting for? Did you think Challenge was going to drive her insane for you? LMAO It's a strong tool but it's not that strong.

Originally posted by Viking25

ME: but hey can I ask you seriously....did you lose interest in me? cuz we went from getting together everyday to no contact in two weeks. The only reason I can think of is that you completely lost interest.

Oh brother, you probably had hope until you started trying to transparently manipulate her like this. First and foremost, you are being very needy asking her like that, hoping she would make it all better. This is AFCism in its purest. Second you are actually using lingo from this Site!!! I never would have thought anyone could be that dumb but it is posted on this site that you do not talk about this stuff with the girl.

Originally posted by Viking25
Her: well, remember when i called you that morning to tell you that i thought we should back off on the physical stuff?

She has immediately begun feeding you piles of ******** and sh1t tests.

Translation: You're acting like a wus. I'm on the market for an Alpha Stud. I'm still going to revel in this triumph, though. Now, for an ego boost, I'm going to see how much AFC I can get out of you.

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: yeah
HER: i just wanted to really sort out how i was feeling about you, and the thing is that i still wanted to get to know you as a person, and figure out if i would still be interested in you romantically without all the kissing and stuff influencing my descision....

Translation: You don't get me all wet like Johnny next door does. I don't want you kissing all over me anymore.

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: i wanted some space but i felt like after the new years thing you were mad at me...

Did you have a web cam so she could see your pouting expression?

Originally posted by Viking25
HER: i tried to keep in touch but you seemed kinda short...
ME: well...that makes sense
Her: i tried to initiate with you and get you to initiate with me but you wouldn't set anything up...
I see....I really appreciate by the way you telling me all this
Her: i even asked you at one point to just ask me out properly if you wanted to spend time with me, but you just kept saying "yeah we'll do something"...
HEr: so i have to be honest Martin, I've put dating you out of the picture by now...

Translation: You see Martin, I'm not at all a stuck up b1tch. I'm the poor girl who got hurt here. I'm the victim.

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: hm...this is gold
Her: i still want to know you, but i just don't see us going anywhere romantically... i'm sorry, i just didn't want to lead you on

Translation: Let me re-emphasize. Even if I were to let you fvck me out of sympathy, my puzzy would not get wet anyway. But I am enjoying the ego boost I'm getting from this. I'm too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party....

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: honesty is always good
HER: do you still wanna try to be friends at least? ... you don't have to if you don't want to

Translation: Getting ready to cut the rope. Just give me the word. Please give me the word. I don't want you stalking me since I'm so out of your league.

Originally posted by Viking25
Her: i think you're a great guy, and i like that we have so many things in common so that's why i suggested the friend idea... but if that's to weird i'll understand

Translation: Just fvcking say you don't want to be friends so I can go find a real man.

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: well..see with friends thing, it doesn't work out if one person wants more out of relationship then the other,I can't be friends with you...because I see you as more then a friend. It's too bad you missread all the signs about me being mad or distant...I wasn't mad at you or even upset...just didn't feel well at the time.
I really really did like you and the thing is, I didn't want to **** it up by spending too much time with you...and trying to give you your space...but I guess you took it as a sing of disinterest.

Now you're explaining your game to her AGAIN. Stop that. I can see that you're trying somewhat to remain a mystery about why you avoided her. But you do this by bringing it up and rotating from disinterested to mad to hurt puppydog. Your also getting into a battle with her over who cares least. She has won.

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: good lesson to say the least
HER: no, i appreciated it... i just don't think my heart was in it...
HER: i'm sorry i hurt you, i really thought that if i gave us some time apart, and apart from all the physical stuff that maybe romantic feelings would grow for you out of just spending time together....

Translation: It's just so good to keep bringing it up that I hurt you. Anyway, time apart, I couldn't get enough time apart, blah blah... (How do I cut the cord on this loser?)

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: well...it's always good to learn something new..so it's all good
HER: but i don't think trying to force a spark where there isn't one is the right thing to do...
HER: you deserve better than that

Translation: I don't even like you a little anymore. Good thing I didn't spread for you. Phewww!
Translation: You deserve a fat girl with glasses.

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: well..we didn't really spend time together
ME: oh yeah..I agree....just wanted to get your side of the story
HER: i knew that having this conversation might be the end of knowing you alltogether... but i didn't want to put off the conversation any longer

Translation: Now I've conveniently steered the convo towards Good Bye. By the way, did I mention... Ba - Bye

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: ok...now I know
HER: so if you don't want to talk anymore i understand, i'll miss our chats
ME: so, I guess, sex is out of question now?
HER: yeah

Her: Ewwww. What a creepy pervert!

Originally posted by Viking25
HER: so...
ME: so...yeah...sex is out of question.
HER: so is this goodbye for me and you?

Translation: What part of Goodbye do you not understand?

Originally posted by Viking25
ME: well..never said hello..really

Now you're being rude. Smooth

Originally posted by Viking25
HER: that's not fair
HER: i never went into this expecting it to not work out
HER: for what it's worth, i never regretted meeting you, buying you that silly book, or any of the time we did spent together..

Translation: Can't you see that I'm the victim here. I was trained since I was a little girl to catch the biggest fish I could. I'm the victim, damnit! THE VICTIM!

Originally posted by Viking25
Well..bu not giving her my full attention I fukked it up. Now I am not sure how to play this one out. I kinda want another chance at her "goods"first,but if that fails I wanna stay friends with her. She has tons of good looking friends and I am not hurt here anyway.I had fun and didn't get attached. So what do yah think DJ?

Nope. If you were to call her up and invite her to hang out as a friend, she would give you the same flakery as if you were to ask for a date.

She tested you and you failed. Then you acted needy and explained your feelings. Then you tried to act indifferent. Her interest level is zero. NEXT! her for the love of God.

Hope I've shed some light on this matter.

Love and Respect,
Satan

 

[R3N3G4D3]

Well, first of all when she asked you to schedule another date you should have made it clear to her that since she canceled the previous one it was HER responsibility to plan a new one. Second, you should have ditched her the moment you felt her IL falling, that way she'd feel that YOU broke up with her, not the other way around. Third, you never spill your feelings out to women, that's what they should do. Remember about being mysterious? Well, telling her how upset you are with her is about as far from mysterious as it gets. And everything you've been saying in your conversation for half an hour could be said to her in less than 5 mins, and would make you seem a lot less needy. You think if you tell her how hurt you are she'll feel sorry for you and decide to get back with you? The more it drags on, the more she wishes that you'd leave her alone. Following dialogue is how I would go about that conversation. I dunno if this is the best way to approach her about this but it's definatelly better than yours:

YOU: So what's the status of our relationship?
HER: blah... blah... blah...
YOU: (cut her off)Yeah, I was thinking about that myself, it's not working out. So if you want to we can 'just be friends'. See ya!

 

[Porky]

Love and Respect,
Satan

hahahaha

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Satan, man I thought God was judgmental!! Take it easy on him - he only has 9 posts -- consider that before you send him to hell

 

[Shot Callin]

Dude this is gonna be hard to recover from, basically you went balls to the wall AFC on her. Not pretty.

Here is one approach you could take. Go out with her somewhere and for a while just ask like friends. Make her laugh, tickle her whatever.. be sorta AFC. But slowly as the night progresses (and this will especially help if drinks are involved) start flirting with her. She is obviously attracted to you, so if you are smooth it will work. Start using Kino, and try to re-establish the attraction thing. Stare into her eyes and make her laugh.

This is like playing the pool shark.

If you say lets go on a date she'll be like oh not really. But if you go out as friends this will give you your 'in' so that you can start the macking process over again. I've done it before myself, so I know it can work. But remember keep the confidence that she is not the only one. Show (and know for yourself) that this is fun and don't come off needy, *****y or moody.

BTW, when you asked about sex it did not sound like a joke, sounded pitiful.

 

[DankNuggs]

hahaha, you were finished before you ever started, the simple fact this conversation was held on chat as opposed to the phone just makes it easier on her to tell you to scram...

She wanted to spend new years with her friends after seeing you every day for a week, and you show her your a control freak who can't handle spending a day by yourself/with friends by sulking afterwards...

She wanted to know you have your own life to lead that she was going to participate in, she didn't want to BE your life right at the start....

You reek of desperation and neediness, and this isn't a clingy type of girl that wants to have a loser relationship with you...

The sex comment was completely off too as she made mention several times that she was hoping to fall for you as a person instead of having it a superficial physical relationship.....she was probably feeling that you were after that more than her as a person....

In reality she probably realized on new years drunk with her friends that you were a drain on her life....she wanted give having a healthy relationship a try after new years, and you blew it...


No biggie, theres always another one....leave this girl alone though....

 

[Charisma]

Originally posted by Shot Callin
Dude this is gonna be hard to recover from, basically you went balls to the wall AFC on her.

Oh my God man, that ****ed me up Friggin hilarious

 

[Viking25]

Lessons

quote:
---------------------------------------------------
anyone can NEXT girl,doesn't take a freaking skill to do it. What takes skill is come back from this and get some action.
---------------------------------------------------
This is an obvious rationalization. It's another way of saying I don't want to admit to myself that it's time to quit. Why don't you just scream the word desperate out your kitchen window? I'm not trying to 5hit on you. I just think your telling yourself whatever you wanna hear cause you feel the poon slipping away

Fantastic point! I owe you one here Rondavu!

Lessons learnt:
1.Don't spend everyday with her first week! Let attraction grow!
2.Girls like MEN, not wussies. Credit goes to Pimp-sicle and PuertoRican_Lover.
3.Don't get TOO caught up in playing everything by the "rules" you've learned.Another credit to Pimp-sicle!
4.Chalenge is a strong tool,but don't overdo it! Credit to Satan Psycho!
5.Don't freaking start the battle called "who cares least",she might win! Credit to Satan Psycho again!
6.Don't be control freak! Credit to DankNuggs! Excelent point and great comments too!

This truly was a test tube relationship. After reading this site and trying to adhere all the rules I neened a field test.So when I met this chick I wasn't interested in having relationship with her,maybe sex,since she was solid HB8. I wanted to learn about my mistakes,hence this AFC conversation with her. I just needed to know Yes,I was curious if I can play her a bit more and just see what I can get. But I repeat...it was pure experiment! I tried to have fun while doing it tho and all the lessons are just priceless!
Yes,I am recovering AFC.,don't know what I am doing yet...but ready to learn and take some hits, and I'm tired of fukking fat bitttches!

 

[Jake Steed]

Lessons learnt:
1.Don't spend everyday with her first week! Let attraction grow!
2.Girls like MEN, not wussies. Credit goes to Pimp-sicle and PuertoRican_Lover.
3.Don't get TOO caught up in playing everything by the "rules" you've learned.Another credit to Pimp-sicle!
4.Chalenge is a strong tool,but don't overdo it! Credit to Satan Psycho!
5.Don't freaking start the battle called "who cares least",she might win! Credit to Satan Psycho again!
6.Don't be control freak! Credit to DankNuggs! Excelent point and great comments too!

These are all important things to know, yes. But unfortunately, you have completely missed the most IMPORTANT POINT. That is, you can't MAKE a girl have interest in you if she's not interested from the beginning. THAT's where you fvcked up. You went looking for fruit in a pine tree.

Didn't you even read her message? She spelled it out for you here:

"HER: but i don't think trying to force a spark where there isn't one is the right thing to do..."

She just wasn't attracted to you, bro. Face it. Nothing you could have done could have made her change her mind, and conversely, if she liked you, these "mistakes" of spending too much time together, etc., wouldn't even be "mistakes" because they wouldn't have fvcked anything up--IF she had interest in you, it wouldn't matter.

One final thing I'd like to say:

"This truly was a test tube relationship....it was pure experiment!"--Viking25

Bullshyt. Every guy says when he gets rejected, that "it was just an experiment." This is a lie. You are only saying this to protect your ego.

Answer me this--if it turned out that this girl liked you and wanted you to be her bf and wanted to have sex with you, would you have said, "Ok, I am done with my experiment! I got the results I wanted!" and called it quits with her and walked away? Of course not. You would have dated her happily. So because of that, it truly ISN'T an experiment.

In fact, this was for REAL. And you failed. Why must it be an "experiment" when you fail? The first step to being a man is facing your failures like a man. Face the truth and just admit you failed because the girl wasn't attracted to you. It's really no big deal.

Jake

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Good post Jake and right on!

But she did see him 7 times - was she feigning interest? Something happened - for all we know another guy entered the picture!

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

I _never_ play the mister I'm not interested card nor the speedcall card... I tend to find talking on the phone (easily 15min+) or if you meet someone out then dance with and talk with them the whole evening usually increases their IL more and more. If you've met a girl, imo there is nothing wrong with having some fast SMS convo an evening or something simular because it sort of conveys the "I'm thinking of you" message which is NOT A BAD THING IF SHE LIKES YOU.... Maybe this is one of the main anchor points, you got to hook her good from the approach... This is ofcourse easier if you are attractive and charming.

 

[Viking25]

Originally posted by Jake Steed

"HER: but i don't think trying to force a spark where there isn't one is the right thing to do..."

She just wasn't attracted to you, bro. Face it. Nothing you could have done could have made her change her mind, and conversely, if she liked you, these "mistakes" of spending too much time together, etc., wouldn't even be "mistakes" because they wouldn't have fvcked anything up--IF she had interest in you, it wouldn't matter.
---
There's a book out there called "Attraction isn't a choice!",yes it's possible to create attraction. She did have interest in me,we spent first week together. I know about women less then anyone in this world,but if she wasn't interested...why the hell would she drive over to my place everyday?
One final thing I'd like to say:

"This truly was a test tube relationship....it was pure experiment!"--Viking25

Bullshyt. Every guy says when he gets rejected, that "it was just an experiment." This is a lie. You are only saying this to protect your ego.

Answer me this--if it turned out that this girl liked you and wanted you to be her bf and wanted to have sex with you, would you have said, "Ok, I am done with my experiment! I got the results I wanted!" and called it quits with her and walked away? Of course not. You would have dated her happily. So because of that, it truly ISN'T an experiment.
First,it was an experiment.I would not refuse sex from her ,but I am sort of persuing other girl who I was working on for few months now and who is truly great.So...no to BF and yes to SEX.


In fact, this was for REAL. And you failed. Why must it be an "experiment" when you fail? The first step to being a man is facing your failures like a man. Face the truth and just admit you failed because the girl wasn't attracted to you. It's really no big deal.

Jake [/B]

Yes I failed!..Just in case I didn't make it clear before.

 

[Jake Steed]

"yes it's possible to create attraction."--Viking25

Oh really? So a 350 Lb warpig could creat attraction in you if she were to simply follow a prescribed set of dating rules such as:

-Not spending too much time with you on the first week. Letting attraction grow.
-Acting like a WOMAN, because men love women
-Not overdoing challenge.
-Not being a control freak.

She could create a spark of attraction where there was none, and convince you to be her boyfriend?

A very common mistake is to think you can use some magic formula to creat attraction in ANY girl. In other words, to mistakenly think women are like computers. (I've said it so many times I'm sick of it, but no one seems to get it.) Sorry, the reality is that there are women out there who just don't have it for you and never will. This applies to myself and every other guy. To think otherwise is just feeding your fragile ego.

"if she wasn't interested...why the hell would she drive over to my place everyday?."--Viking25

You only knew this girl for a week! How in the hell are you supposed to know her well enough to assume ANYTHING!? Fact is, you have NO idea who this girl is. She could have needed an ego boost and you came in at the right time to provide it. She could have been lonely. She could have had her hamster die and you reminded her of it so she indulged hanging out with you for a week.

You are trying to figure out someone by CREATING your own framework by which you can judge them. This will never work.

First,it was an experiment.I would not refuse sex from her ,but I am sort of persuing other girl who I was working on for few months now and who is truly great.So...no to BF and yes to SEX."--Viking25

Whatever you need to say to make yourself feel better.

BTW, I give you props for trying.

Jake

 

[jakethasnake]

That was fvcking beautiful.... you said exactly everything I would've said.


Oh btw Jake, I have a response for you in that thread about Asians (I responded to the post about your Asian gf) that got turned into a flamefest thanks to some people I don't care to mention. Check it out, and let me what you think. I hope I didn't sound disrescpectul in it, coz I generaly appreciate a lot of what you have to say. Peace.