An Uplifting Point On This Journey For Newbies, and Vets Alike.

A-Unit

Master Don Juan
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When talking with a buddy of mine, K, I recalled how over the years, the women who retained my number recircled around for a second or third go at me.

Why?

I remarked how many people are like beaten-down dogs, wearing a badge of scars, almost proudly. They get to a certain point based on their dating career and they internalize ALOT of what's happened that they're so timid to make a step, it's like they're afraid to enter for fear they're tits will beam hard.

When you can separate yourself from the 'game' so to speak, you realize it's just a matter of mating habits, and that the more you search, the more luck you will have. YES. The MORE you SEARCH the more LUCK YOU WILL HAVE.

Further more, the more dating you do, the more you will realize people aren't totally nuts (though close), but they are EXTREMELY IDEALIST, to the point where their ideals and beliefs MAKE them who they are to their dying day. Anybody who challenges them, challenges their ideals.

I dated a girl from TX a year ago who calls and leaves msgs about how she misses me. This girl next had it so good, and will never have it that good again. Since we split, I've seen her tumble down hill smoking 3x/day, living with drug dealers and druggies, losing her bestfriend, getting in a near fatal accident with her friend, and a host of other oddities. She was a suite, extremely hot girl, yet she was troubled by the fact her father left her mother at the age of 2 and constantly dwelled on such a fact. When we got close, after about 1 year, she felt that it was time to split, b/c in her mind the warning lights went off that such a thing happened to her mother, IT MUST HAPPEN to her. She couldn't see the programs running her life, and now, since we've been through over a year, it's evident to me she didn't want to go through with it.

Many guys that opine over 'wanting of a woman' don't realize how seriously messed some women can be. It isn't meant to be negative. In fact, this is a positive. Some girls who reject you are stuck on X's who are off screwing other girls with diseases. Some girls who you're trying to pick-up are destined to get pregnant soon out of shear stupidity by the wrong guy.

Having a HIGHER goal than just women gives you stability to stay the course when a woman bucks you around like a wild horse would.

Don't give into the fake mental images you're concocting. I have friends purporting they're great at understanding humans, but in reality they're just 'assuming' what they would do. And since they're highly aggressive, self-centered, and pushy, they very often gloss right over the persons true intentions and force them into something they don't want.

David D said it on his Advanced Dating Program that when you begin adding more dates to your plate, you realize that having so many, and all the upset you had over a lack was for naught, because a good many of them are a waste of your time. It's good fun to relax and enjoy it for what it is, but don't become so disheartened over the journey because you've been met with failure. The biggest thing you've done was...

Take responsibility for your life and the women you allow into it. With your eyes wide open, you're able to manage yourself and your time better. You can be more successful with the ladies. Maybe it doesn't happen today, in January, or even 2005, but does that mean you should stop working at it to sacrifice future progress in 2006, 2007 and beyond? NO!

So many people will dismiss the power of just 'knowing' this. Yet, that's the biggest step to take. It's the largest chasm to cross. And by doing so you're open to a whole world of new delights.

As in fight club when Tyler Durden (the real one) says...

"My eyes are open, Tyler."




A-Unit
 

dearsappho

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Great timing A-Unit!

Just this second f*cked off a flakey chick and felt real bad about it 'cause I liked her loads...

Damn I feel better!
 

A-Unit

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Thanks Man.

dearsappho,

Glad you saw what I see. More often than not, life is not logical. Yes, there's cause and effect, but little of it do we actually see, because there's too much mental clutter. I, like you, and other's do often get dejected from time to time when things don't workout. However, let me cite a few cases where it worked out for the better.

*Girl 1 - Dated for 2 years. We split over a lack of interest. I pursued her for nearly 8 months, aggressively, then gave up. She came after me, then we just ditched it. Since then she was serious with a guy who has alcohol and diabetes. She's been calling me more and more, and related how 1 night out he punched her in the face. Not to mention she'd added on about 20 lbs to top out over 150 lbs, far above her cheerleader-like figure.

*Girl 2 - Essentially lied about her past so I'd like her. Had a grab bod and beautiful face. Turned out she was a major druggy, who was always upset over her father leaving her. Recently she's been calling as she "misses me", though she's basically bankrupt, still doing drugs, lost all her friends and packed on the pounds.

*Girl 3 - Was another busty cheerleader I dated during college but kept in contact as an FWB. Since we last hooked up, she, too, put on mad weight over 150 now, and has severe hormonal imbalance problems (hyperandrogyny, that impacts her ability to be slightly feminine; also can't get her period WITHOUT pills).

My list is endless, and in any case where I was slightly emotionally invested, it turned out ALL the better they left, for I may have not SEEN the problems until they brought them to my attention.

In deference to Pook's post on "Dodging the Bullet," you do just that when you take HER LEAVING you as a warning sign of things to come.

You see...

When you put yourself right, and take care of yourself, become a person of high moral fiber, and lead a life as a Man/DJ, you know she MUST be nuts to leave you. But you must have the inner confidence to not arrogantly seek this path. It comes from a peaceful knowing that everything happens for a reason, and that the best kind of feelings are those freely given. No matter how big a girl's boobs are, or how sloppy her BJ's might be, unless she's freely giving them to you, they're not satisfying, and in some cases its a form of indentured servantry.

Mr D'Anconia would agree with Rand's point on Love and Expression of Emotion. Though the characters were some what stolid, when they expressed emotion they did so freely, knowing that EMOTION and FEELING and ANYTHING from someone can only be given when it's done freely of their own will. Anything else is lesser and NOT what any great man would desire. He seeks reality and truth, not the falseness of base emotions. [Which is why I dislike meeting people for the 1st time on booze].

It's that there won't be some EFFORT put forth, but by God man, don't string life in her balance. The MINUTE you're dejected, take that moment to reorganize your life. STAY ON PATH.

A book I recommend is:

The Power of Concentration.

You CAN only be HERE now. Where you are, YOUR THOUGHTS MUST be, or you're HALF ALIVE. It's nice to fantasize, but you're losing THIS MOMENT to something else. HALF your energy is be expended on SOMETHING MADE up, and now you WONDER why you become upset over not having what you want here and now?

Because your mind isn't HERE and NOW.

In Way of the Peaceful Warrior, the mentor Socrates asks the question:

Where are you?

to his student Dan.

Dan would reply with the location, then city/town, state, country, planet. But he missed the big point.

HERE.
NOW.

To make tomorrow great, today you must be present TODAY, working those plans. We cannot know all that will come in the future to us, nor can we even REASONABLY guess what is going on beyond ourselves so why bother?

Ask of yourself...

Where do I want to be come summer of this year?
Where do I want to be at Dec 31 2005? What do I want to feel about the year past? The year forward from there? How would I change new Years? What do I have to do to change it? Get at it!

I find it funny when some of my friends just get random jobs post hs/college for no specific reason. I ask them 'why' they're doing what they're doing, and most of them do it to just 'pay bills.' That's all well and good, and maybe we all won't know the outcome or our dream job, THAT however does not mean we HAVE to foresake what inspires us, makes us happy, and gives us life. Nor does it mean we cannot save money for a better life to come.

So Thank the woman for flaking. It's a time to test your metal, because THIS is when you choose the path of the Man or the boy. Not when things are great, but when they're tough.



A-Unit
 

lbfan1638

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aside from pook, i think you're one of the best posters this forum has ever seen...i love all your posts because I can always relate them in one way or another...thank you
 

belividere

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you just managed to write a lot of what I have been thinking about and did so quite eloquently. this deserves a bump up to the top
 

Never try to read a woman's mind. It is a scary place. Ignore her confusing signals and mixed messages. Assume she is interested in you and act accordingly.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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