Am I wrong in thinking this? All advice/opinions welcome

[Phyzzle]

The problem was never this chumpish brother's friend. The problem was cordoncordon's vascillating wussiness! I can just see this blonde posting to the female version of sosuave:

"My bf, after 2 years together, is STILL not sure if he wants to move away with me. He's not STILL not sure if I'm worth leaving his friends and parents."

C'mon. Obviously, everyone is going to tell her it's over, to dump him now and find someone else! She's not being manipulative or disloyal. She's just acting like any self-respecting womon would in the same situaiton.

If she's now agreed to live there with him, and get engaged, I'd say problem solved.

~Phyzzle

 

[cordoncordon]

Phyzzle, I understand your point, and appreciate it, but at the same time its not as cut and dried as that. I would be moving there for her, no other reason. If I was on my own, I wouldn't move. I have no reason too. I have a great life here in MI with awesome friends, family, lots of sporting activities- I grew up racing harness horses and there are 3 different tracks in my area with many people I am still friends with, great nightlife, etc. The two people who I hang out most with, from playing golf to having some beers, are my brother and my cousin.

It is going to be extrememly hard giving this up. I know I can visit anytime I want, but still tough. But, I know I sincerely love my gf, and don't want to lose her. I don't think I'm being weak by saying that my current life as I live it is very important to me and the thought of moving clear across country is a difficult decision.

 

[cordoncordon]

Rollo, she says that she originally told me it was a girl because she thought I might get upset knowing it was a guy. (Which is my origial point-if she knew I might be upset-why do it?) From the time she first said it was a girl to where she admitted it was a guy took maybe 20 seconds. I'm not making excuses for her, but at the same time she wasnt going into a long ordeal about it and trying to continually lie to me.

 

[RedPill]

Phyzzle, I understand your point, and appreciate it, but at the same time its not as cut and dried as that. I would be moving there for her, no other reason. If I was on my own, I wouldn't move. I have no reason too. I have a great life here in MI with awesome friends, family, lots of sporting activities- I grew up racing harness horses and there are 3 different tracks in my area with many people I am still friends with, great nightlife, etc. The two people who I hang out most with, from playing golf to having some beers, are my brother and my cousin.

It is going to be extrememly hard giving this up. I know I can visit anytime I want, but still tough. But, I know I sincerely love my gf, and don't want to lose her. I don't think I'm being weak by saying that my current life as I live it is very important to me and the thought of moving clear across country is a difficult decision.

This post convinced me 100% you should NOT be moving. The highlighted text is what clinched it.

 

[NewMan]

She not bad looking - perhaps a little on the old side (in my opinion - but I like fresh meat lol).



I think you should let her go - to late to change your mind now, and it doesn't seem like you really want to move there.

Go visit soon after she gets there and see what happens from there.

I wouldn't fight things as they are - there's no sense in forcing the issue on things. I doubt that she is going to get into it with her brothers bud - but I expect that they will become 'friends' - since he is the only person she will know.

I think you need to let things transpire as they will.

 

[cordoncordon]

New man, shes 32, Im 35.

 

[Phyzzle]

its not as cut and dried as that. I would be moving there for her, no other reason. If I was on my own, I wouldn't move. I have no reason too. I have a great life here in MI

If you were the one with the opportunity of a lifetime, but your woman (of 2 years) said she liked her hometown too much to move away with you, you'd drop her like a bad habit. We all would. That's what's cut and dried to me.

 

[MacAvoy]

Did you ever move, how did it work out?

 

[iqqi]

Haha. THIS thread of all threads to be resurrected.

...

 

[Luveno]

She told you she was meeting a female out there to look for houses, but upon further prodding she admitted she was lying and it was a male?

Here's how I see it:

She wanted to go out there and "look for houses" with this guy, and if she liked him or was horny, she'd have a go at his penis. She lied to you because she did not want you to find out.

However, you prodded her as a father prods his bratty daughter, and her, feeling submissive to male authority, fessed up.


She lied because she's going to leave you. She plans on it.

Just end it now.

 

[cordoncordon]

She told you she was meeting a female out there to look for houses, but upon further prodding she admitted she was lying and it was a male?

Here's how I see it:

She wanted to go out there and "look for houses" with this guy, and if she liked him or was horny, she'd have a go at his penis. She lied to you because she did not want you to find out.

However, you prodded her as a father prods his bratty daughter, and her, feeling submissive to male authority, fessed up.


She lied because she's going to leave you. She plans on it.

Just end it now.

Wow did this come out of nowhere lol.......update>>>>>

That last post goes to show you sometimes how wrong people can be with their advice on this forum, I mean he couldnt have been more off base lol.
Actually, we split up 1.5 years ago when she first moved to CA (she hated the break up and didnt want to do it but understood), I dated another girl for about 4 months in MI, I then broke it off with her, and about 2 months later my ex and I started talking and I am now in sunny Santa Monica CA with her, which is where I have been since last fall.

 

[KontrollerX]

Kind of off topic but I am curious...

Does this post indicate to us all that you are now 37 years of age cordon?

If so happy belated birthdays.

 

[MacAvoy]

Wow did this come out of nowhere lol.......update>>>>>

You can thank me for that, I was looking at some threads that you started. I knew that you ended up dating another women from the next thread but I was curious as to what happened. I think the way things went down, probably worked out best for you.

I'm curious though, after being gone close to a year, I know you likely love your new environment but how do you feel about being away from the place you grew up at?

Reason why I ask, is that I went through the same thing, moved across the country and actually liked it there but I have a huge family and we are very close so it was tough being away from them.

 

[cordoncordon]

You can thank me for that, I was looking at some threads that you started. I knew that you ended up dating another women from the next thread but I was curious as to what happened. I think the way things went down, probably worked out best for you.

I'm curious though, after being gone close to a year, I know you likely love your new environment but how do you feel about being away from the place you grew up at?

Reason why I ask, is that I went through the same thing, moved across the country and actually liked it there but I have a huge family and we are very close so it was tough being away from them.

Oh it's the exact same as you Mac.

I mean don't get me wrong, I DO like it here a lot. I live 2 blocks from one of the largest beaches in the world here in Santa Monica. Half a mile from the famous SM Pier. A block from the promanade. Hollywood is 15 minutes away. Malibu, Laguna beach, San Diego its all here. It's sunny and 70-80 degrees here everyday. There are just tons of things to do everyday. And the women? Oh my! lol

But you're right, it's not home. I grew up in MI, all of my family is there. My friends etc. At most we will be out here one more year as we still have a condo back in MI that has been for sale and knowing the market will never sell, so we'll see. I plan on going back lots this summer .

 

[iqqi]

Kind of off topic but I am curious...

Does this post indicate to us all that you are now 37 years of age cordon?

Biting my tongue.



.....

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Waitaminutewaitaminutewaitaminute...


the girl you were talking about at the start of this thread...


....you got back together with her when you moved out here?

 

[Latinoman]

Post #19 By Latinoman (end of post)

..............
NOTE: IF all you need is a computer...then why don't you move there with her? Why wait? Why stay behind? You need to sever the umbrillical (sp?) cord that is HOLDING you back to your family and State. If you can't do that...then you are not the man for her. She is making the right decision by taking the offer. No woman and no man should put a hold in their goals for a boy/girlf friend.

It appears that by your update...you decided to stay behind (breaking off the relationship) and she decided to pursue her goals and career. Then after several months, you two went back together and you decided to move with her. In essence, everything I wrote in that "Note" took place.

1- You decided to let her go. She decided to pursue her goals.
2- You later decided to get back with her. You moved with her.

Either one or two would have been the correct decisions. But in your case...you did #1 first...and then #2.

Both were the correct decisions.


I bet you my reputation in here...I bet you two are VERY happy together. In fact, I am willing to bet that she made the right decision taking that offer and you made the right decision moving to California with her.

Of course, you prefer to be in Michigan...but at the end, you
still made the right decision.

 

[Latinoman]

Haha. THIS thread of all threads to be resurrected.

...

What's so funny about it???? This is a thread that clearly illustrate which advice was the correct one...and which advice was incorrect.


Nothing funny about this. In fact, it is great we can have a follow up to see if our advice was correct or incorrect.

 

[MacAvoy]

I bet you my reputation in here

Remember your reputation is based on how society views you!

Latinoman is our ace arguer.

Ok, now that I'm done teasing you and your done gloating. I'm willing to bet dollars to donuts that he wasn't ready to move at that time and that he would have likely resented her if he moved at that point.

But by staying behind, dating another women, he realized how much he valued her and was that much more comfortable in his decision to move and is that much happier as a result.

But we can never be sure about that. But if you like, we can argue about it for 12 pages since you seem to like to argue. :rockon:

 

[KontrollerX]

Biting my tongue.



.....

Hate to break it to ya iqqster but I was not taking a clever, subtle or even an outright jab at cordon.

I was genuinely curious.

Just because I sometimes share harsh words with your fanclub doesn't mean in general I don't respect most of the guys in it.

For example to say it where everyone can see it I have no problem with ThunderMaverick or cordoncordon.

I would like to see you and potato removed from the site permaneantly sometime soon iqqi and I'm sure vice versa but since that will unfortunately not happen until you go even farther off the deep end (which probably won't be long from now) I'm going to have to decide what is better putting you on ignore or continuing to jaw with you where necessary to prevent posters from following your bad advice blindly.