i've been attempting through the summer to meet up with a mutual friend HB of my friend who went to same college as her. they know each other but aren't friend friends if that makes sense. also my friend i dont see too often so an introduction would never occur. anyway she was due to move to my town for law school this month but at the last minute changed to a campus closer to where she lived as she has some family probs and needs to be near. that through a spanner in the works as i was banking on her being in my city this year. i messaged her originally off facebook and she's not one of those girls who internet dates, never has never will (thinks it's for weirdos meeting strangers online) so she was already semi reluctant but thought i was good looking. i eventually got her number and we have been talking on whatsapp ever since. we arranged to have coffee during the day in my city as a happy medium as she's still not comfortable with the idea of meeting a stranger. and would only come down if she was planning to meet friends after. (unfortunately during the summer during the times she did come down we had not arranged to meet yet - i only got her number like a week before the last time she came and since then she's stayed in her town or gone abroad) also cos i originally thought she was moving here for law school there was no rush.
the issue is because my plans were scuppered by her not moving her for law school and all the endless talk on whatsapp i sensed i was giving way too much attention after i found out she wasnt coming. i admit i liked her attention too but that shouldn't be my goal. fast forward to this weekend, i was out and came home early and was supposed to go out again with my buddy who canceled, she messaged me if i fancied a chat (as in phone call) i made a semi big deal about it as im reluctant to talk on the phoen cos im really bad at it. i felt she'd be more apprehensive about meeting if i didn't talk so i did but i couldnt do the usuall 5 min call or 20 min call as we'd been talking months on whatsapp. anyway the call lasted 2 hours before my phone cut off due to mins. i didnt call back i just sent a msg saying i ran out of mins which didnt deliver until the morning meaning she switched her phone off so i couldn't call her back. it was 2am anyway. i sense attention seeker behavior from her from the beginning. the next day she just texts me haha it's ok doesn't matter
. no message about i enjoyed the phone call etc or anything that would indicate IL. i took that as a red flag. i waited till today to message her and i sensed disinterest. instead of leaving it and going silent i asked her if she still felt apprehensive bout meeting after our call. she didnt respond to that and replied to something else, i follower up again later in the convo and she purposely avoided answering it so instead of just going silent and ignoring i decided to just say 'i guess you're still apprehensive then, ok cool. take care. bye'
then she's all like 'why what for?' and refers to something else..playing dumb. i tell her im not referring to that.. she's playing dumb i think. she says i thought i was joking and why would she keep talking to me if she was apprehensive.i call her out and tell her for attention and that no reply is the same as saying something. she just laugh it off saying 'hahaha well i appreciated the chat'
i left it as that. am i overreacting?
the issue is because my plans were scuppered by her not moving her for law school and all the endless talk on whatsapp i sensed i was giving way too much attention after i found out she wasnt coming. i admit i liked her attention too but that shouldn't be my goal. fast forward to this weekend, i was out and came home early and was supposed to go out again with my buddy who canceled, she messaged me if i fancied a chat (as in phone call) i made a semi big deal about it as im reluctant to talk on the phoen cos im really bad at it. i felt she'd be more apprehensive about meeting if i didn't talk so i did but i couldnt do the usuall 5 min call or 20 min call as we'd been talking months on whatsapp. anyway the call lasted 2 hours before my phone cut off due to mins. i didnt call back i just sent a msg saying i ran out of mins which didnt deliver until the morning meaning she switched her phone off so i couldn't call her back. it was 2am anyway. i sense attention seeker behavior from her from the beginning. the next day she just texts me haha it's ok doesn't matter
. no message about i enjoyed the phone call etc or anything that would indicate IL. i took that as a red flag. i waited till today to message her and i sensed disinterest. instead of leaving it and going silent i asked her if she still felt apprehensive bout meeting after our call. she didnt respond to that and replied to something else, i follower up again later in the convo and she purposely avoided answering it so instead of just going silent and ignoring i decided to just say 'i guess you're still apprehensive then, ok cool. take care. bye'then she's all like 'why what for?' and refers to something else..playing dumb. i tell her im not referring to that.. she's playing dumb i think. she says i thought i was joking and why would she keep talking to me if she was apprehensive.i call her out and tell her for attention and that no reply is the same as saying something. she just laugh it off saying 'hahaha well i appreciated the chat'
i left it as that. am i overreacting?
