Am I getting to her??

[chuck-101]

So.. I met this HB 9, easy HB 8 in anyones' book. We have been having a FWB type relationship. I've been trying to seduce her into just wanting me.

We went out last night, I saw this text from her when I woke up this morning:

So.. I made it home and am in bed.

Just wanted to say thank you for being so great. The sex was great but I also enjoyed laughing with you so much. I felt so good. And thank you so much.

A little history:

Met her a few months ago. Sex mostly. During our last sexcapade, I asked:

I need to know the rules of engagement here. Are we sleeping together? Or are we seeing each other?

She replied with:
Just sleeping together for right now.

Maybe a little needy on my part. However, I just needed to know if I should just keep playing the field or focus on her....


I'm not sure what my end game is here. Mostly I guess a hot trophy G.F. and the satisfaction of conquering/seducing her for my ego.


Any advice on this? How to proceed? Is this looking good?

TIA!

 

[Thorninmyside]

Don't do the "what are we?" thing. That's for the girls and you've given this one the power of decision in this instance.

You totally want to keep seeing other girls because it gives you options, helps you avoid being needy (probably even develop/increase your aloofness), helps you steady your game. Plates help you avoid desperation and embrace abundance.

Basically, be an awesome lay, a kickass dude and make her want exclusivity (and earn it fwiw). Don't talk about being in a relationship. It doesn't come across as manly.

 

[RangerMIke]

Just keep fvcking her and go after other women. If you want something exclusive with her the WORST thing you can do is to stop chasing other women. If she gets a sence that you want to lock her down to a commitment she'll run.

Women end up in relationships with men that start off just wanting to fvck them.

 

[stevo]

Her message shows a high interest level, good for you.

Be happy your message didn't drive her away. She should be trying to make you hers, not you trying to make her yours.

At this point, she should be chasing you. Your ego should be fed, you already fcuked a hot babe, continue to focus on yourself, not her.

Let her be the one to initiate getting together while you focus on awesome dates and bringing variety to seks.

For your sanity, see other girls. She doesn't have to know and treat her like she's just like every other girl, it's hard to fcuk a girl on a pedestal.

 

[chuck-101]

Awesome advice guys.

Yes, you are all correct. Thank you for pointing that out.


I guess this was good, other than what I thought:

After we left earlier than night, I left my phone on her seat with the text screen on. And caught her "peeping" at it when I was not looking. It was filled with messages from HB's that had texted my w/i 30 minutes of her looking at it.

You are all correct and spot on! Thank for this paradigm-shift in thought. That advice is totally alpha, mates.

 

[Meisterman]

First of all by even ASKING her that question you are being subservient and demonstrating that she is the higher-power individual. YOU should be calling the shots, and SHE should be asking those questions, not you. And yes you should keep playing the field. As soon as you "focus on her" she will sense it immediately and lose attraction. Then you will be **** out of luck because you have no other options, and all your emotional energy has been invested in this chick that's not even there anymore, and you will be left with nothing and feel like sh*t.

If she thinks there's no way you'll ever leave her or walk away, she will lose interest. The reason she hasn't lost interest is because she doesn't feel she's "won you over" yet. But as soon as you give in to this by turning AFC and "focusing on her", she will walk away. So don't even try to go there, you're playing with fire. Keep playing the field, and don't get sucked into her emotional vortex. Which often happens slowly over time and you don't even realize it until you're too deep in, like quick sand

The greatest misconception is thinking "Okay I have a girl now. I must shower her with attention, praise, effort, and time." No no no no no. You keep doing what got her attracted to you in the first place. And that was likely you not giving a fu*k one way or another, acting like you have nothing to lose and no emotional investment. The hard part is maintaining this frame and mindset as time progresses, as it's easy to sink back in to your old ways and "show her the real you." Nope. Big mistake.

 

[chuck-101]

Thanks for the advice guys! I owe you all a beer!

Totally worked. This morning she texted me: "good morning".

About 45 minutes later I texted: "I just stepped on your ear-ring you left on my floor last night."

::EDIT::
Then she replied about her text the previous night. I just totally disregarded. Then replied with, "You mean that semi-sappy one? That was sweet".

Then after she replied again, I acknowledged a little more interest in her w/o getting sappy at all.
::End edit::
Haha!

Then after banter all day, she just invited me to an NCAA game with her friends from work. So... that's a pretty decent step; meeting her friends, I'd think.


Again, thanks. Looks like this is now going where I want despite that small hiccup.

 

[salinechow]

POST HIJACK:

HAHA. Guess I shouldn have sent that girl flowers to show her I am not the player she thinks I am huh. O well. Its done now.

Anyway, Good for you Chuck, enjoy the ride. Sounds like you hit a trifectea here.

Het Miesterman, where were you on my post. ahhhh.

Ill deal.

 

[chuck-101]

She came and stayed the night last night. Brought a heart shaped pizza and these for "valentines day".

http://s7.postimg.org/p66mm7g97/20150214_150525.jpg