alpha widow laments that she is not attracted to her "soulmate"

MatureDJ

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For starters, I’ve had two sexual partners. One was a LTR who was quite low value (literally NO options besides me) but had a very good heart and loved every fiber of my being. The other was a very high value (I’m talking women throwing their boyfriends/husbands away at the CHANCE of sleeping with him) fling who of course couldn’t truly love or commit to me (why would he with all of his options?).
I feel like guy #1 is my soulmate (I met guy #2 when we were on a break) however, how that I’ve had guy #2, someone with MUCH higher value, I feel NO ounce of attraction to guy #1. None. His beautiful heart and soul used to be enough for me but now they aren’t.
It’s not only guy #1 that I’m no longer attracted to. I’m no longer attracted to ANYONE. I’m very realistic about my own value (6) and I know that I cannot get better than guy #2 (9). I’ve not met anyone who could compete with him and if I do, chances are that guy will NOT want anything to do with me. I mean, he may want to bed me for a short night if no better girl is around but that’s it.
I’m completely unable to settle for less than guy #2. Which is sad because less than him is what I deserve. I sincerely feel NO attraction to anything less. I can even say that I feel disgust. I haven’t slept with anyone since him (it’s been a year) and I’m still as attached to him as ever. Meanwhile he’s getting laid by a new girl every night while texting me to say he misses me.
 

zekko

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Fundamentally, this isn't much different than the guy who dates "out of his league" and then gets a bad case of oneitis.
Then he comes to SoSuave to post about it and seek help.
 

Desdinova

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I feel like guy #1 is my soulmate
She is incorrect. It is guy #2 who is the "soulmate". Like I've said before, a woman becomes throwaway, damaged trash once she's been alpha-widowed. This is also how I see High Score Theory working. The guy at the top trumps everyone else on the list. The new guys at the bottom simply fall off. The only hope she has is to date someone she previously had a crush on, but a lot of that is made up of celebrities and high school crushes.
 

zekko

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She is incorrect. It is guy #2 who is the "soulmate".
I know you're talking about alpha widows and High Score Theory.
But I don't care if you're a man or a woman, NO ONE is your "soulmate" if they don't desire you back. At least this woman is smart enough to realize her position. Of course, that doesn't mean guy #1 is her "soulmate" either. Besides, we don't believe in that here anyway.

It's like if a guy wants a woman who will never give her the time of day. I don't care how hot she is, or how much he likes her, if she doesn't return his affection or interest, she's not worth his time.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I know you're talking about alpha widows and High Score Theory.
But I don't care if you're a man or a woman, NO ONE is your "soulmate" if they don't desire you back. At least this woman is smart enough to realize her position. Of course, that doesn't mean guy #1 is her "soulmate" either. Besides, we don't believe in that here anyway.

It's like if a guy wants a woman who will never give her the time of day. I don't care how hot she is, or how much he likes her, if she doesn't return his affection or interest, she's not worth his time.
If you continue to place a priority or go around someone who doesn't value you, that means YOU don't value you.
 

Spaz

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wow it sounds like it was written by redpilled guy.

"For starters, I’ve had two sexual partners. One was a LTR who was quite low value (literally NO options besides me) "

normal women dont say such stuff
Wrong, for the vast majority of women this is normal.
 

RedScorpion

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I’ve never seen a woman use the term ‘low value/high value’. That’s a phrase something this forum would use. Along with the ‘options’ focus. There’s a lot of direct focus on how first guy had none, while second guy had other women wanting to cheat on their bfs and husbands with him. These would be things qualified by guys as valuable. Not as women. She would say he’s ‘mysterious’ or ‘sexy’ or ‘adventurous’, or something more emotional. Not ‘wow this guy gets laid a lot! He’s my soulmate’.

Smells like bull**** imo.
 

Mike32ct

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The scenario described is plausible. And women certainly judge guys by “value.”

But they generally don’t use the terms “high value guy” and “low value guy.” That’s seduction community guy lingo. That’s why I suspect it was written by a guy.

“I dumped my beta bux AFC husband and hooked up with a Chad. His game and social calibration subcommunicated high value and alpha male traits. What attracted me most was his frame and ability to hook sets quickly. I knew after he first negged me that I was gonna go home with him and give him a full close. I don’t have time to write a field report right now.”

~signed, a chick
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Everyone "hi sides" and inflates their value. Folks in college fight over "status" and their NOBODY. Yeah if someone thinks that, let them go.
I know a single mother who thinks she deserved a successful entertaining. A regular 40k job. Really bad attitude. But if the guy she's messing with is not a entertainer he'll be treated like dirt. So should you really care?
 
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