All I want is...

[comic_relief]

no the problem is not with a lack of confidence, but where the lack of confidence is showing up. You are desparate.

Just have a fvcken blast in college, show that you are fun (put yourself out there), and watch the girls come to you. If you are fun to be around and you hang out with all manner of women, then you will get girls.

It's the comic_relief way to get a girlfriend. I have had two relationships prior to this during high school and one current one in college.

comic_relief

 

[ChrizZ]

I'm going to a community college. Everybody knows each other already and rushes out of class with their cell phones as soon as class is over. You can't talk during class either. The HBs just sit there and are bored. I could be as entertaining as Eddie Murphy and they would still yawn. I don't wanna be the dancing monkey, I wanna be a fearless motherfvcker that's not afraid to show his sexuality.

 

[ChrizZ]

Okay, enough excuses. By rereading my posts I came to the conclusion that I acted like a b!tch. Tomorrow I WILL approach. I'll post the FR in this thread then. If I don't approach tomorrow I want to be banned from this forum. Forever.

 

[comic_relief]

congrats on your conclusion because I was going to call you on it.

Here is a good opener to use that has been comic_relief tested, "Hi, I'm comic and you are..." or a variation.

comic_relief

 

[gherald]

I overcame fear by jsut asking myself "Is this all you've got? Are you just bluffing to yourself about what you promise you'll do?"

 

[ChrizZ]

Okay, today I pussed out several times until I finally stopped overanalizing.

I saw a cute chick at the train station while I was walking home. I looked like sh!t at that time lol. She was prolly in her mid twenties.

I walked straight up to her and I could feel the tension in my body getting stronger and stronger. Here is how the convo went:

Me: "Hi, do u know where XYZ is?" ( This was no routine, I really wanted to know )

HB: "Oh, I don't know. I'm not from here either."

Me: "Where r u from?"

HB: "I'm from San Diego and I just moved here like a week ago"

Me: "Oh, that's cool I'm from Germany"

*Me, gazing in her eyes for a few seconds*

Me: "You are gorgeous. I wanna get to know u better"

HB: *Lightening up like a Christmas tree* "Oh, I'm totally flattered, I don't know what to say. I have a bf however. I'm sorry"

Me: "Well, he can keep you busy when I'm not around *wink*"

*we both laugh*

Me: "Okay, I tried. Have a good day!"

HB: "Thank you so much. You just made my day!"

This was an extremely tough step for me and I'm proud of myself. Tomorrow I will make two cold approaches!:rockon:

 

[Derek Flint]

What? You mean the world didn't come to an end?

What a surprise!

Congratulations on your cold approach, yet don't give up after a week.

Learning a new skill takes time.

Learning to correctly do DA's is a skill that takes time to learn.

And yes, DA is not nearly as easy as it appears to be.
99% of the guys here or anywhere else will not even try it, or they will try it and quit after a few attempts after getting rejected a few time.

They will hide behind fake openers and all that other BS to place a buffer between their fragile ego's and rejection.

DA takes balls. Cold approaching a HB 9 or 10 and directly stating your intentions in a confident manner, without apologies or excuses is not easy.

And that is one of the reason why it is so effective - you are showing your "target" that you have balls, and that you do not fear rejection.

It creates massive attraction as well as showing a high "S&R" value (MM guys know that means Survival and Replicaton ability) which appeals to women.

You don't have to spend 20 minutes creating attraction with stories and canned routines and other BS, but on the other hand, it is hard to do it correctly.

Also, by being direct in other parts of your life, it will naturally carryover to other parts of your life, including your interactions with women.

 

[FutureSpartan]

Way to go man! You just took a big step towards improving your love life!

I know it was nervewracking, my first 10 approaches were like that as well. Eventually once you step outside your comfort zone repeatedly it becomes easier and easier.

Approaching random women is second nature to me now. It took about 60 approaches to finally rid my fear and anxiety though! Keep practicing!

One tip (credit Gunwitch)

Approach lone women: This is important, minimize the unpredictability of a nearby friend or group of friends by approaching single women. When with a friend or group friends her societal conditioning is at a high so by approaching them by themselves you don't have to deal with the "What does my friend/s think of this guy?" dynamic

Good luck!

 

[ChrizZ]

Way to go man! You just took a big step towards improving your love life!

I know it was nervewracking, my first 10 approaches were like that as well. Eventually once you step outside your comfort zone repeatedly it becomes easier and easier.

Approaching random women is second nature to me now. It took about 60 approaches to finally rid my fear and anxiety though! Keep practicing!

One tip (credit Gunwitch)

Approach lone women: This is important, minimize the unpredictability of a nearby friend or group of friends by approaching single women. When with a friend or group friends her societal conditioning is at a high so by approaching them by themselves you don't have to deal with the "What does my friend/s think of this guy?" dynamic

Good luck!

Thanks man!

To me it's not even about women anymore. It's about fighting that fear. After I got rejected by this chick I felt totally happy because I finally fought that fear and gained a lot of confidence. Feeling that you are growing as a person is one of the greatest experiences one can have IMO. I realized that it is the choices that we make that define who we are. Furthermore it is the confidence and experience we get out of those choices that give us the drive to keep going and never look back. Now there is only one direction for me and that is all the way up to the top. This site has helped me so much and I will pass on my knowledge when I eventually am where I want to be in life...

I know this was only one approach, but that's exactly what I needed to get the ball rolling.

 

[ChrizZ]

hmm, two days without a direct cold approach now. I pu$$ed out several times. It's like I KNOW that nothing bad will happen if I approach, yet I still fear approaching.

It's hard, but I gotta do it. My future depends on it! Tomorrow I WILL approach.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Good job, you received the victory but not the trophy!! This is not only a physical game, but also a mental one -- one barrier crossed!!

 

[ChrizZ]

Good job, you received the victory but not the trophy!! This is not only a physical game, but also a mental one -- one barrier crossed!!

this is actually a very wise post.

Mods please don't close this thread. I really want to post my progress in here.

 

[ChrizZ]

Okay, today I only did one direct cold approach. While I was walking to the bus stop I saw an ice queen with an Ipod in her ears and wearing biga$$ sunglasses rushing my way. She wasn't even that hot.

Me: Hey, whatsup?

Her *unplugs IPod and looks totally pissed*: "What did u just say?"

Me: I said you are gorgeous and I'd like to get to know u better.

Her: *gives me weird wtf look*I don't think so. I'm busy... *walks away*

I don't know if my AA is normal. Everytime before I approach it feels like I'm holding a gun to my head and I have to force myself to pull the trigger.

tonight I'm going partying, so I'll post more cold approaches soon.

 

[ChrizZ]

aight. I just came back from a party. I went out alone. I grinded with some chicks and felt their pu$$y and titties etc. However they don't want to have sex. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Any ideas what I've been doing wrong?

 

[wolf116]

Did you lead them off the dance floor? Did you proceed to talk, then ask them how they were getting home?

 

[Sean Stock]

Okay, today I only did one direct cold approach. While I was walking to the bus stop I saw an ice queen with an Ipod in her ears and wearing biga$$ sunglasses rushing my way. She wasn't even that hot.

Me: Hey, whatsup?

Her *unplugs IPod and looks totally pissed*: "What did u just say?"

Me: I said you are gorgeous and I'd like to get to know u better.

Her: *gives me weird wtf look*I don't think so. I'm busy... *walks away*

I don't know if my AA is normal. Everytime before I approach it feels like I'm holding a gun to my head and I have to force myself to pull the trigger.

tonight I'm going partying, so I'll post more cold approaches soon.

That´s a terrible approach. No offense. I consider myself fearless and that would be pulling the trigger. You better have something interesting to say if you make someone turn their music off while they are trying to get somewhere.

I feel like you are skipping to the end game without doing anything to make them want you.

You are coming off as desperate, and mildly creepy.

 

[Sean Stock]

Okay, today I only did one direct cold approach. While I was walking to the bus stop I saw an ice queen with an Ipod in her ears and wearing biga$$ sunglasses rushing my way. She wasn't even that hot.

Me: Hey, whatsup?

Her *unplugs IPod and looks totally pissed*: "What did u just say?"

Me: I said you are gorgeous and I'd like to get to know u better.

Her: *gives me weird wtf look*I don't think so. I'm busy... *walks away*

I don't know if my AA is normal. Everytime before I approach it feels like I'm holding a gun to my head and I have to force myself to pull the trigger.

tonight I'm going partying, so I'll post more cold approaches soon.

That´s a terrible approach, and you are going to come off as desperate and creepy.

Talk to girls who are a bit bopred, not girls who are completely preoccupied and trying to get somewhere. Save compliments for when you have made them question themselves a bit and after they have laughed once or twice.

 

[ChrizZ]

yeah, I prolly came off desperate and creepy, but I was totally drunk just like everybody else. I will have to step up my game the next time. I just don't get why it is so damn hard to get laid.

 

[B4IFURU18?]

Chris -

Your first approach was awesome.

Your second approach was just weird and unnatural. I wouldn't even mess with distracted people, it's a lot of effort.

Instead of going with "you're very gorgeous", I would keep it less flattering and go with "you seem really neat/interesting/cute/cool".

Keep plowing.

 

[B4IFURU18?]

yeah, I prolly came off desperate and creepy, but I was totally drunk just like everybody else. I will have to step up my game the next time. I just don't get why it is so damn hard to get laid.

It's not that it's hard to get laid, it's just that you need to be firing on all cylinders or damn near.

I've banged a handful of women in my life (22 years old), and none of them have been one night stands or bar pick ups.

Usually it's me getting a number from a girl at the bar, going on a few dates, then ****ing.

Don't give up, if you work hard, and work well, it's going to happen.