All going well but girl doesn't reply to text

[viking22]

I met this nice girl last week on an online dating site. We set up a date last friday and it went pretty well, conversation flowed she was smiling a lot, very playful and sweet. The Saturday evening i forget i had her added to msn messenger and she says hi and asked me whether i enjoyed the date, i say yeah and she says i had a really good time with you. We chat a few minutes more and she says she's tired and i say good night.

This week she had exams so i do not contact her figuring it will be easier to set up a second date when her exams are over.

Tuesday she texts me saying "Hi how are you doing. My laptop is broken so we cannot talk online. Im so upset I lost all my essays so will have to redo them again. Xxx"

I reply a couple of hours later saying

"Aw sorry to hear that. Hug for ela. Hope the rest of your exams are going well x"

There's been no reply from her and its been over a day now. I mean Im guessing she is distracted with exams or whatever, and my text didn't really need a reply.

I asked a friend and she says the girl maybe thinks im not interested as i haven't asked on a second date or said I want to see her again, and this may be why she is not replying.

What does everyone think?

 

[jlr12584]

i think your being a ***** about it. it is your job as the man to ask her out on a second date. if she asked you how you felt about the first date, then she is showing interest. go ahead and ask her if she'd like to go out again sometime soon, and ask when she's available.

 

[DJCT]

Don't waste time with texting, MSN, overthinking/overanalyzing or going through friends to get information. Call the girl and setup another date. Don't linger on the phone. If she says yes to your meetup proposal and she shows up with a good attitude, I'd say there is a chance she is interested. If not, forget about her. In both cases, work on finding more girls.

 

[WesCottII]

You ENDED the text messages. That was a clear "don't text me back" ending.

Neck up and invite her out because you're sailing VERY close to the "friendship zone" wind. Hug for Ela?

Wtf.

 

[Kupid Diggs]

Text messaging is the devil... Just call the *****

 

[viking22]

OK called her. She said her exams would be finished by Wednesday so we can meet then.

Gives me a week to try and get with some other girls and get her out of my head. Which is probably a good thing as she's got under my skin.

Cheers for the advice guys

 

[wjh]

OK called her. She said her exams would be finished by Wednesday so we can meet then.

You're setting yourself up to be flaked on.

Always make specific plans, otherwise plan on the "plan" failing (is that a pun?). I promise that if you don't set specific plans with this girl for after Wednesday, she will have better things to do. There's a very high probability of this happening.

Gives me a week to try and get with some other girls and get her out of my head. Which is probably a good thing as she's got under my skin.

You MUST do this. Don't just conceptualize this, but ACTUALLY do this. EVEN IF you don't bed other girls in ONE week - work on getting MORE than one woman in your life (that you're pursuing). Go out and spend SIGNIFICANT amounts of time approaching, conversing, getting numbers, and following up. Do this, it's very important for your growth.

 

[Matt Rogers]

Don't listen to the exam stuff. You should have invited her on a second date and if she wanted to spend her evenings studying she'd tell you and then if she counteroffers or says she wants to see you after your exams then you know she is interested.

 

[viking22]

Yeah i think ive probably screwed this up as all ive got is her saying "she can meet next wednesday".

I want to get some solid plans from her rather than have her cancel the night before. Do people reckon I should phone her tonight (Sunday) to finalise the details and get her to commit to a time and a place.

 

[viking22]

Well I texted her Sunday night saying

"Hey. I wanna confirm Wednesday, do you know what time you are free on Wednesday?"

She replied

"not yet. how are you? how was your weekend?"

I text back

"weekend was fine, went to a great party saturday night. how was yours?"

No reply from her.

I don't think it is looking good. I mean she does work part-time which is probably why she doesn't know when she is free on Wednesday, but her reply was kinda lazy and her questions were obviously just polite and i shouldn't have answered them.

I was thinking that the only thing left to do now is wait to se if she will get back to me and tell me what time she can do. Obviously if she cancels im going to delete the number.

 

[n00bPimp]

Well I texted her Sunday night saying

"Hey. I wanna confirm Wednesday, do you know what time you are free on Wednesday?"

She replied

"not yet. how are you? how was your weekend?"

I text back

"weekend was fine, went to a great party saturday night. how was yours?"

No reply from her.

I don't think it is looking good. I mean she does work part-time which is probably why she doesn't know when she is free on Wednesday, but her reply was kinda lazy and her questions were obviously just polite and i shouldn't have answered them.

I was thinking that the only thing left to do now is wait to se if she will get back to me and tell me what time she can do. Obviously if she cancels im going to delete the number.

No dude, you've forgotten the basic rules. Calling her to confirm 3 days early is just wrong. Seriously, whats that all about? You're maiking it seem like this date is the biggest event going on in your life.
Would you call your male friends to confirm 3 days before?
You're just letting her know that shes high up in a pedestal.

You blew it. Live and learn

 

[viking22]

OK so I figured I blew it and deleted the number.

Today I get a text from her saying "Sorry I can not make it today. Still college stuff. When are you going new york? I want to see you before. Sorry. X"

(im going to new york on sunday for two weeks on holiday)

I was expecting a flake, so in that sense it is not surprising. But I am not sure whether to believe the rest of the text.

What would be the best response to this?

Should I say i have quite a few things to sort out before i leave on my trip, and i'll maybe see her when im back from my holiday?

Or should I just tell her simply when i'm leaving and leave it up to her to try and make a date if she is genuine?

 

[viking22]

DonS yeah you've convinced me. Looking at the evidence she is clearly playing games. I don't buy the exam stuff either. Nobody studies 24 hours a day when they have exams.

Is mentioning another girl if she tries to contact me again a bit obvious? She may just think im trying to make her jealous and not believe me.

 

[insomniac]

DonS yeah you've convinced me. Looking at the evidence she is clearly playing games. I don't buy the exam stuff either. Nobody studies 24 hours a day when they have exams.

Is mentioning another girl if she tries to contact me again a bit obvious? She may just think im trying to make her jealous and not believe me.

So you're going to lie to her about seeing another woman to make her jealous? That's playing games as much as she is.

She's doing online dating, which means she's seeing guys other than you. This is probably the "work" and "college stuff" that is keeping her busy. Of course, she's not going to tell you that (nor should she).

The good news is you're still on her radar. I doubt she'd even still be asking to meet you otherwise.

Pick one day before you leave. Call her (CALL, not text) and tell her you're available that day at Whatever time. If she says she can't make it, tell her "OK, maybe I'll talk to you when I get back." If she can make it, make concrete plans then and there...no more planning to make plans. If she flakes again, just move on.