Akward Kiss! its over!

[Stormblade]

This is background -
I've been kinda half azzin the DJ thing after my ex
Finally i've gotten out into the field
Anyway, I met this girl we went out, I was all C&F, very funny and outgoing, I didnt kino, didnt kiss - was very much a challenge
Anyway we have another date
I'm like yeah, its your turn to wine and dine me. What you got planned, Shes got this movie she wants to see with me. Shes comin over to my apt and im like well...your gonna have to watch it in my room...your not scared are you?
she laughes so im like damn...girl agreeing to be alone in my room watching a movie...so then im like, and I've got the alcohol if your down...its bad stuff you shouldnt have any...and she laughes
So guys...
Girl alone in my room!
Watching a movie!
Alcohol is involved!
I'm a little worried though, I havent made a move on a girl in months...its gonna be weird goin for the kiss

Well guys the date happened...lots of kino, we fed each other, drank together saw a few movies and just talked till 3 AM
I was like well you need to leave...but I want to do one thing before I go...And I went for the kiss...it was so akward...after im like iew that sucked...you wanna try better and shes like no...so I walked her to the car and said nice knowing you...Excellent first date night except for the way it ended...the kiss is a big deal though...so I dont think it'll work out...What do you guys think?

 

[Shiftkey]

I think you shouldn't've waited til the end of the date to kiss her. She's -in your room- -on your bed- and you don't make a move?? Maybe she should've undressed and spread her legs open to give you a better sign.

 

[Stormblade]

Understandably, I know this I wanted to move earlier but we were always in an akward position. So finally time is moving along and im like screw it...she didnt stay at my place for 6 hours to talk! then it was dead fish kiss....ARGH!

 

[Shiftkey]

lots of kino, we fed each other

we were always in an akward position

Do these sound right together?

Haven't you ever made a move on a woman? Or do you always wait for her to make the first move? Be honest with yourself.

She waited for 6 hours for you to make a move, got frustrated, and lost interest. The kiss at the end of the night was awkward because it was a pity kiss.

 

[Stormblade]

Hey im not looking to get hammered for screwing up...I undoubtedly screwed it up...then she kept staying and I was teasing her that she needed to leave...this kept her for another 3 hours...why freakin stay!...what the hell was she looking for?

 

[Julian]

FOR YOUR TO MAKE A MOVE FOOL!

edit - i swear sometimes it just takes a slegehammer with the message engraved in it to get some of the answers into your heads.

 

[platy]

Maybe next time when you're thinking about making a move, you'll think, "Hey it's better to be shot down now, than never try." And then just go for it. Don't worry about what happens. Just be a man, and all man want physical action. If she's not into it, NEXT! There will another very lucky lady who will be. But really, it is no big deal. We all take steps, just make sure they are forward steps.

 

[Shiftkey]

Maybe next time when you're thinking about making a move, you'll think, "Hey it's better to be shot down now, than never try." And then just go for it. Don't worry about what happens. Just be a man, and all man want physical action. If she's not into it, NEXT! There will another very lucky lady who will be. But really, it is no big deal. We all take steps, just make sure they are forward steps.

You don't even need to think that, because when a woman is alone with you on your bed, there's virtually no way she's going to reject you.

Hey im not looking to get hammered for screwing up...I undoubtedly screwed it up...then she kept staying and I was teasing her that she needed to leave...this kept her for another 3 hours...why freakin stay!...what the hell was she looking for?

So why post this? What are you trying to accomplish?

 

[happyhourhero]

Hey man don't worry about this, take the experience as it is and learn from it. I'm the exact same way- wuss out even when her signals couldn't get any clearer. I have girls now that i think resent me a little because they wanted me so bad (i just posted about this in another thread) but i didn't make the move and theres no going back and trying again.

I just had a horrible experience like yours where it was obvious and this one was where i reached boiling point. I would now rather have a chic slap me for trying to kiss her than have that ****ty feeling of know i p*ssed out. So just make this situation your turning point and now you know what you gotta do next time.

No worries

 

[Rondavu]

Bottom line you didn't read the flow and go with it. You ignored instinct and got burned. It's like that Van Halen song right now.... "Miss the beat, you lose the rhythm/And nothing falls into place, Only missed by a fraction/Slipped a little off your pace".

All it takes is a little hesitation to throw your whole approach out of whack. Learn from your mistakes and move on to a better next time. You had a pinch of fear. A pinch is all it takes. Total confidence is important. Total confidence only comes from being in your game. You can't be with your good game if your just beginning to play again. It's spring training for you right now. It's not your fault you didn't hit a homerun in your first at bat. Your timing is all off. It's just the way it is. It's completely natural. That's life. Don't beat yourself up over something that's happening the way it's meant to. You have to accept that you'll fail before you succeed. Just like anything in life. Like I said though, the good news is you probably didn't display any huge flaws. You only missed by a fraction. Sounds like your on the right track.

 

[Stormblade]

I'm rusty...I was just looking to see what I could have changed or done better
Make the freakin move...I made the move, I ended the night and was like one more thing and went for it...not the smoothest thing I ever did...but what can I say
I guess I'm all screwed up...Apparently now I cant make moves on girls and I freakin failed at being a man in any sense of the word...So I should go kick myself into a moving bus
Ugh, I dated a virgin now just started foraying back into this stuff...is there any links to help me refresh myself
Cuz I apparently just suck!
Thanks for the feedback though

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Originally posted by Julian
i swear sometimes it just takes a slegehammer with the message engraved in it to get some of the answers into your heads.

Hey thats a good one julian engtraved message hey.....i'm thinking the message should be embossed on the sledgehammer if you are going to get it into someone's head -- no?.

Protruding vs. Intruding

 

[Stormblade]

Holy shucks Batman!
She IM'ed me tonight from this party at 1 AM
I told her I was out at a party myself and had a good time
she had all this small talk...laughed at my inane comments
How should I approach this now!

 

[il_duce]

I think you know what to do now, if you've read through this thread.

And if she flakes out this time, next her. Simple as that.

 

[Cremasta]

You can recover this one Storm, have done it myself, but it took me ages (read years) to do it. Very AFC and in the friendzone.

Originally posted by Stormblade
you wanna try better and shes like no...

Where you messed up on the other date was here, you gave her a choice. Don't do that again.

If/when you get another try, make sure you kiss her at the start at the date. When you say hello, give her a big hug and just kiss her on the cheek. As an aside, I have had heaps of chicks say they love it when they get a decent hug, not one of those wussy, light, one-arm things. Use both arms and give her a decent squeeze...

Okay, back on topic. The first kiss is just a teaser to get her used to being in contact with your mouth. When it comes to the 'proper' kiss, don't hold back or be hesitant in any way. This will be your last opportunity, so give her a decent smooch this time.

 

[golf299]

im going to enlighten you with some of the best advice i've gotten from this site...

"When in doubt - make the move. Ask her out, kiss her, touch her, gently pull her hand and guide her into your bedroom. Women are waiting for you to give them a life. If you find yourself wondering if you should, chances are very good that she is wondering why you don't. This is a test of self-confidence that almost all women demand of men before they will take them seriously. If you think women have a mind of their own then women will think you are a fool. "

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by Rondavu
Bottom line you didn't read the flow and go with it. You ignored instinct and got burned. It's like that Van Halen song right now.... "Miss the beat, you lose the rhythm/And nothing falls into place, Only missed by a fraction/Slipped a little off your pace".

classic.

dude, this was your situation to fvck up and you did. i mean 6 hours. you missed the boat by about 5 hours.

when a chick comes over to your place, with the intent of watching movies in your room, and there's prescheduled alcohol involved--what more is there to say???? it's not a slam dunk, but darn close.

when a chick comes over to my place for dinner and such, i immeditately greet her with a kiss on the cheek to set the tone of the evening and remove a barrier. no hesitation of any kind. you can't lose on this strategy, because it's actually polite.

you should have made your move when you started feeding each other.

so, she's giving you another chance to redeem yourself. dont' fvck this one up.

 

[Stormblade]

Oh boy,
New update!
I use instant messenger alot and last night I left up a message about how im either masturbating to my reflection or hardcore porn...I come back later from a shower and I see she left me a message saying, ooo that sounds fun, either way should would be awesome, then I got a ttyl
So anyway i havent spoken to her, went out all day, left up an away message about having an extra ticket to a game on wednesday night and she left a message asking to go with me!
She IMed me later but I didnt answer and let the pc go idle.
You know kicking her out of my apt was just about the worst thing I ever did to a girl, but, it firmly gave her the indication it was her screw up and she keeps trying to contact me!
Wow...back in my AFC days...treating a girl like crap gets her obsessed about me!
Man...I owe alot to this site
Anyway I'll update when I nail her, WHEEE!