Again rejected

[Pimp-sicle]

The thought had occured to me, but I dont like the shaved look and I will only look like a villain. I'm refusing to accept this thing as inevitable particularly becaues I have spent so long trying to correct this, it was even improving somewhat, but one day I stupidly stood under a waterfall at a hill station and it caused a near sudden increase in baldness, and worse, a further accelerated process of miniaturization of hair follicles over the months. It is all so shocking.

Man listen to yourself! First off if the conversation when THAT GREAT between you two, she would have agreed to go to dinner with you, even if it was just as friends. I see this on here all too often.

Guy meets girl, has conversation, gets number and then can't get her to agree to a date. He comes here and tells everyone how great the 1st meeting went and he's confused that the girl is suddenly not interested.

Now what I think is a more plausible explanation; she might have enjoyed the conversation; not as much as you, but enjoyed it nonetheless. However she might have only seen you as a friend from the interaction due to many factors which you don't know. Seeing that you don't know you go back to your insecurity and blame it on your lack of hair.

I don't know exactly what you two were talking about, but as others have said, I see a few errors in how you proceeded:


1) called too soon: now I'm not a stickler for the whole 3 day rule. But calling the next day? 90% of the time that's going to come off as desperate.


2) Asking her out 3 times in one conversation: deal killer.... you might have still had a chance if you only asked her once and then continued to see her at work from time to time to build up more rapport and attraction.


Lastly, get over your whole "villain" theory and shave your head. You have no idea how people, especially women will react to you with a shaved head because you've never tried it.

And I can tell you this: there are A LOT more people who notice guys with weird hair do's, come-overs or other weird hair styles trying to hide their baldness. Shave your head and see what happens. If anything more women will become attracted to you if you aren't insecure about your hair anymore.




PIMP

 

[nismo-4]

Look, man, you weren't rejected by the girl. You were rejected only by yourself.

Give off more positive vibes! Find ways to make that bald head work in your favor. If girls try to make fun of you for it, just have some witticisms ready and use them playfully! You're a man right? Stop crying! Stop that sh*t! Listen to Uncle Pimp-Sicle! Do it now!

You've been here since 2007 and you're still worried about this type of sh*t?! Look here, Be confident and secure about yourself as a man. Then go talk to women. Know your role and don't be scurred!

Understand the blue writing well and you should be straight!

 

[Serg897]

I shaved my head about 10 months ago, and I don't think it has noticeably impacted my ability to attract women. There are so many bald men around these days - you are joining a special fraternity.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

Hair aside, you messages that I don't have confidence is not fully digestable by me. I thought even though I'm insecure I could raise about that when I force myself to talk to a woman. For example, without any confidence could I have done what I did today - It is nothing much of an approach, took less than a minute and ended up busted, but does it suggest anything about my personality.
I saw a cute a$$ed woman walking ahead of me on the way to the office. I know from her id card hanging down from her hand that she worked in company X (I work in company Y). She was listening to an ipod. I stopped her and said "Excuse me, it is almost 10.30, is your company cafeteria open to outsiders? I work in company Y and there would be nothing available now"

"No, it is not open to outsiders" ( A fact I had known)

"Oh, I suspected that. it used to be open for outsiders in the past right? But a few days ago I saw a board that 'No outsiders allowed' or something along those lines"

"Yes, they have recently done so"

"Why, some outsider committed some mischief?"

"lol, no, I think the food is subsidized and they want it to be available only to our company employees".

"Well, that makes sense.."

"You could go to the Pyramid food court on the other side, you know?"

"Ah,, yes... But I used to like to there in your cafeteria"

"Yes, that is true.."
(she is smiling and my office has arrived and I stop and so she stops for a moment too)

"So, what's your name by the way?"

(A little alarmed) "<my name>, yours?"

"<my name>. I noticed you have a pleasant smile and a pleasing personality.."

(Reaction that she Unexpected this) "thanks.."

"I was thinking why don't we meet up sometime later for a nice little conversation ... "

"Actually I get very busy once I get to office"

"Yes, I dont mean now, but may be in the weekend,..? Are you single?" (I really didnt' know if she was)

(Acts shocked, but still has the smile, thinks for a sec) "I will be on my way" and walks away.

"Ok, bye"

(shouts back with a laugh continuing walking away) "Bye".

 

[Kailex]

What? You thought that just because you approached someone and made her laugh a little... she's guaranteed to give you her name and phone number???

You've got to be kidding me.

At some point each and one of us has striked out with someone. How is this so different?

Nothing here is guaranteed. Just because you walk up to someone and talk to them and convey confidence, it doesn't guarantee that you'll be getting something out of it. All of it is time, practice, and learning. Please, stop with the pity party, work on yourself, shave your head and try again in a few weeks with other women.

Did you want me to read that and say... Oh... yeah, nevermind you ARE confident... it HAS TO BE THE HAIR.

I'll give you this, at least you have the balls to approach someone, which is something that I think half of this board wouldn't even consider doing, but what do you want us to tell you? You obviously aren't listening to us when we say it's not a hair-issue but are AYSF-issue. You want to pin-point the source when we are telling you what the source is.

Like I said, even if you address certain aspects of yourself and conquer certain fears/trials/tribulations/insecurities... it does NOT guarantee that you'll get a number everytime.

Just live with that fact and move on to the next girl.
At least you got "rejected" rather than regret not talking to her.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

My point is, must I necessarily shave it all off? Obviously mental toughness is required even for a shaved guy (but not for a guy with head full of hair, IMHO), there is no shortcut. I'm insecure about the ugly combed-over look but from a front view as it is not so obvious due to my height, I can control the first impression during the first few moments of the interaction. In fact when I was interacting with the girl at the cafeteria I was thinking, let me get into her pants even before she gets a good look at my head, then she will feel more "invested" in me, and the ugly look won't matter much after.

 

[r0cky]

Post a pic so we can have a better opinion as to whether the bald look will fit you. I got the buzz cut about 4 years ago when I was only 21.
I got more compliments on my looks after I buzzed it than before I did.
Pic here
Before pic
The before pic is from my better days of hair.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

More than how it will look to others, I think I will feel naked when shaved. May be I will get accustomed to it but am not sure. Another thing is that, here in India shaved look is not common as in America.

Anyway here are the pictures taken before the waterfall-at-hillstation horror, I had thin hair even then, but now much worse.

(non-smiling criminal-looking photo)
http://s289.photobucket.com/albums/.../?action=view&current=Picture005.jpg&newest=1

(smiling photo taken carefully to post on dating profiles)
http://s289.photobucket.com/albums/...action=view&current=BlackTShirt2.jpg&newest=1

 

[Isko]

A year ago I had tried wearing a cap while approaching women but over time I felt like I was cheating and hiding something which she will eventually find out anyway, so stopped doing it.

I was sitting by her side and whenever we spoke I made sure she didn't see my sides. After eating while walking to deposit the used plates still I was cautious to not let her see my ugly side but I have a suspicion she may have seen.

Do you see the contradiction there? You're hiding something which she will eventually find out anyway. Are you gonna make it all the way to sex, or a wife, or whatever you're going for, without letting her see you from the side?

Your hair looks fine from those photos, anyway, so you must not have posted a photo of it from an angle which embarrasses you.

I'm balding too, and as soon as it looks too noticeable I'll just shave it. Get an earring or something too.

Everyone in this thread gave great advice to you; it's not about your hair. Pretend you have the hair of a rockstar and see what happens.

I had resolved so much to regrow hair, invested so much time & effort although ended up wasted, my mom was also vexed about my hairloss, she always used to say how much thick hair I used to have but now I have the head of an old man, I have felt bad for letting her down. Just like accomplishments add to confidence, I would feel much accomplished and confident if I had been successful in my endeavour. Its not just the lack of hair on top of my head, it is the big failure story behind it that makes me feel down.

WTF are you talking about, you can't grow hair on purpose, unless you use Rogaine or whatever. In any case, tell your mom to either buy you some Rogaine or shut her mouth. You didn't fail at regrowing hair. You can't SUCCEED at regrowing hair. Even Rogaine and other products like it do not work for everyone. It's genetic. By the way, baldness is inherited from the mother.

I mean this in a friendly way: Your mom sounds like a b!tch, and so do you. You have nothing to feel bad about. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You did nothing wrong.

 

[DonJuan11]

- I have not been sarging due to heavy feelings over my bald head.
- I have a small bunch of hair (but hairs easily countable) at the front that to an on-looker looks like I'm not ugly bald, from the front view. I was sitting by her side and whenever we spoke I made sure she didn't see my sides.

Translation: Since I don't have enough game and talking abilities to attract a girl through my personality and words, I'm going to use my looks as a scapegoat to feel better about myself. After all, to work on my personality and game takes effort, practice, time, and I also risk rejection which my ego can't handle. It's much easier just to blame my lack of success in seducing girls to a physical feature which I have no control over, that way my ego is kept in check most of the time.

- Today I called her and asked her if she would join me for dinner
- she just said she had other plans
- I asked about tomorrow, she said she wasn't sure
- I asked when she will be sure
- she said "I DONT THINK THAT IS A GOOD IDEA".
- I can't think of any other reason than that I'm bald why she rejected me.

"Cindy, can you go for dinner today?
"Sorry but I have other plans"
"What about tomorrow?"
"I'm not sure."
"When will you be sure?"

And she rejected you because of your bald head? How does that conversation sound sexy, confident, mature? It sounds like you need to put it someplace warm as soon as possible or you'll rape her.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

I don't know why you guys got me wrong, I said those photos are taken before I stood at the waterfall. Now it is much much worse. I didn't post them to show how bad I look, I posted them because r0cky wanted to give his opinion whether the shaved look will suite me.
If you want a wrong-angle picture, here is one, but even this was taken several months ago and it is worser still now even compard to it
http://s289.photobucket.com/albums/...ion=view&current=BlackTShirt2003.jpg&newest=1

I could take a picture of me now but my sister has taken away my digital camera with her.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

"Cindy, can you go for dinner today?
"Sorry but I have other plans"
"What about tomorrow?"
"I'm not sure."
"When will you be sure?"

And she rejected you because of your bald head? How does that conversation sound sexy, confident, mature? It sounds like you need to put it someplace warm as soon as possible or you'll rape her.

Ok, look I would not have talked like that usually, but with this woman I assumed an existence of rapport.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

WTF are you talking about, you can't grow hair on purpose, unless you use Rogaine or whatever. In any case, tell your mom to either buy you some Rogaine or shut her mouth. You didn't fail at regrowing hair. You can't SUCCEED at regrowing hair.

There is a techniques taught at www.luftek.com for regrowing hair with relaxing the skin. It had worked for me to some extent in the past, those days I still wasn't content with the progress (if I had known what is to come in the future, I would have been content) and most of the time would spend time on visualization techniques, those days I was not sarging. Ironically after I started sarging I seem to have lost focus on the techniques and the hairs have fallen down, and then there was the waterfall-at-hillstation horror.

 

[Prodigy746]

Balding has nothing to do with it, have you read the book called the game??? one of the most popular pickup books.. The pickup artist ...is bald and has alot of success.

 

[r0cky]

Balding has nothing to do with it, have you read the book called the game??? one of the most popular pickup books.. The pickup artist ...is bald and has alot of success.

Thats right. and I know a couple of local puas who are bald.
One more thing, wtf is with this waterfall you keep mentioning? I cant make the connection between hair and waterfall.

 

[AreYouSingleFemale]

wtf is with this waterfall you keep mentioning? I cant make
the connection between hair and waterfall.

As my hair was already thinning it seems like it couldn't withstand the waterfall falling from so great height from hilltop. I was stupid to not realize that it might damage the hair even more. I should atleast have kept my fu**ing hands on top of my head while standing there. Soon after that incident people starting mentioning that my bald area has increased vastly. Even on the crown and even in the back except in the lower back. Just like Jason Stratham.
What's worse is that, apart from killing hair, it has also sent the remaining hair follicles down the path of slow death. Every time I visited my parents' at intervals of a few months, they said I was balder compared to the last time. I can see that it is true, because I'm balder now than in the ugly photo I showed you.
I still wish I could just take time off from pickup and exclusively focus on hair regrow techniques for sometime. Although I make every attempt not to go out much for the sake of approaching women, I still approach when an opportunity arises to save myself from the pain of regret. For example on the way back from the gym this morning I found 2 young Tibetian girls at a roadside eatery, and I bought myself a juice and made small talk with them but finally my target lied that she don't have a phone or email.