after first date!!!

[wizzard]

Hey all, went out on sat with a hb , that ive known for a year, and somehow we ended up goin out together

Anyhow, we ended up in bed together, but sadly, she was wearin the good old clot mop, so we didnt have sex................

Ok, so the next day, i asked her if she wanted to go out again and she said ' if you want???????? So, i says ok, we'll arrange somethin then. So tonite i asked her if she wanted to do something, and she said she would, but its her friends bday, so shes goin to see her! 'Some other time then hb!

Question is, i dont wanna seem desperate, so do i not ask her again or what?
Help me pls

 

[anakin]

Never have a first date on a saturday. First of all, she has to work to be able to earn you on the weekend. Secondly, by dating her first time round on a saturday, it gives the impression that you would otherwise have had nothing else to do (even if that was the case, she ought not know it).

Perhaps you were too enthusiastic wizzard. Remember, it is the person with less interest who controls the situation. You, my friend came on too strong in wanting to take her out the following day. It paints a picture of you having nothing else to do. You want to be with her all the time. Ideally, you would have waited and rearranged a get together many days later - at the earliest.

OK, now it is her friend's birthday so she cannot go out...hmmm!!
Well, that's great isn't it? Wish her friend a happy birthday and say you understand and ask if you can go along too! LOL (P.S. I was being sarcastic by the way..)

Seriously, what do you do? You wait. The fact that you were able to almost have sex the first time bodes well - she is interested - but you have to lay back a little dude, otherwise you will kill the situation.

So, my advice, is to wait until many days before calling her to arrange another get together. Then take it from there.

 

[Mizer]

Question is, i dont wanna seem desperate, so do i not ask her again or what?

You looked desperate by asking her out the very next day especially after coming so close to getting laid and it not happening. She is probably thinking that your are thinking that since you came so close, you are going to try harder to close
the deal now.

I am not familiar with the phrase "clot mop" but you should back off for a while. Don't call or hang out for a bit.
She was in bed with you so that is a good signal but show her that you have other things to keep you busy.

Backing off at times does wonders for readjusting yourself and not looking needy or desparate in your date's eyes therefore, increasing attraction. Good Luck!


Mizer

 

[wizzard]

Thanks guys, its kinda what i was thinking anyway! The only reason we went out on saturday, was that we spoke on the phone at 8, and found neither of us had anything to do, so we decided that we'd do somethin together( remember that i know her well already) ! (we were both fairly drunk, so im hopin she isnt regretting it, but im not gonna ask)

Ok, so now i will wait for a few days, and see if she comes a chasing, then play it pretty cool. Ive been out the dating game for 7 years, and its kinda weird gettin back into the swing of it, so yes, im gagging for it!! Summer = testosterone

BTW!!! clot mop, is a crude phrase for a tampon!

 

[anakin]

Wait at least 5 days. Good luck in getting back into the swing of things wizzard.

 

[wizzard]

I hear what you are sayin Anakin, but as we know each other so well, i know that she will contact me over the next day or so, but probably wont say anything about goin out again. So i guess i dont ignore her, but just talk without mentioning going out again, at least for a few days!

 

[violator]

I somewhat disagree with Anakin and Mizer that you should always wait and present a challenge. Sometimes you have to act while the "iron is hot" so to speak. It all depends on the circumstances.

If you were in bed with her and were close to getting laid, then you have to basically read her to deternine whether you want to wait around or give it another try. She will give you certain cues like ask you, "Well, what are you doing tomorrow?" or other hints that she wants you to stay around.

This happened to me a while back. I was with this HB on a first date and we almost had sex but it never materialized. She gave me hints that she wanted me to be with her through the weekend but I didn't pick up the cues and decided to pullback for a couple of days. Well, to make the long story short, she lost interest and I lost the girl.

Otherwise, I agree that you should pullback a little before going back to her.

 

[htemorp]

Give time before calling again, if she still has an excuse, next her.