After a life as a bachelor I'm currently in a relationship...

[CornbreadFed]

I once had a LTR over 5 years with a woman that had 4 siblings. At times there wasnt a weekend in a month which hadnt some family or social circle meetups from her side going on. I am a single kid and an introvert and man i hated her social circle shyt going on all the time.
I put up with that in my bluepilled early 20s but wouldnt do so these days. There is no pvssy out there that good.

DO NOT let anyone tell you you are anti-social for not enjoying her social-circle shiat. Forcing yourself into these situations will only drain your energy and happyness.

Get a compliant woman that respects your needs and adores you for who you are.


That said, your other problem seems to be a lack of ability to get involved emotionaly with women.
I was there too. However good looking and nice the woman was, after a 2-3 weekends i had my fill of her.
I left some good LTR-material women back in the dirt at that time.

The problem for me was i didnt feel anything for them. If you do a lot of pump and dump it can dull your emotions for women. It was all about the thrill of the "new pvssy", hunt it down and then move on.


You will have to make peace with the fact that EVERY pvssy will get old at some point and that you either have to stick with one or forget about LTRs.

Best pvssy I had was from this college girl that lived with her parents in the burbs. We would split locations, but I HATED going to her parents house because it was boring and far away. I wouldn’t do that shvt again, I have a 15 mile max pvssy rule now.

 

[The Duke]

A man must find his happy medium. I encourage everyone of you to spin plates, have a few one night stands, have short term relationships, have long term relationships, date a few crazy girls, date a few amazing girls, even get married but only once! All these experiences help you to understand women better, and most importantly yourself.

 

[SargeMaximus]

Not everyone is monogamous. It can feel stifling and stagnant. OP has the same experience I had with my ex in that she initiated all the sex and I was happy to do it but I did always crave new girls. Some of us like variety

 

[BadBoy89]

My girlfriend is a very good looking girl, she is younger than me, family oriented and doesnt show any hoe behavior like those in social media.

I'm strongly considering an exit plan to just be friends with her without hurting her.

Either the sex is not good, she is not hot, or she is overweight, or she is older, or something else.

I was with my ex for a long time, and the sex was just about as good at the end as it was at the beginning. The only reason I started to lose interest was her looks started to fade fast. She was hot at 33, and at 37 she lost big time. I would have been her 24/7 if her looks didn't fade.

If your girlfriend is young and hot, there is something you are hiding from us.

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

Either the sex is not good, she is not hot, or she is overweight, or she is older, or something else.

I was with my ex for a long time, and the sex was just about as good at the end as it was at the beginning. The only reason I started to lose interest was her looks started to fade fast. She was hot at 33, and at 37 she lost big time. I would have been her 24/7 if her looks didn't fade.

If your girlfriend is young and hot, there is something you are hiding from us.

I dont think I'm hiding anything at least willingly, I believe there may be some issues as an other user pointed out in the previous page that there are strong differences in personality where she is totally extroverted while I'm easily fatigued in social settings.

Or it may be the fact that with all the f-buddies I had before, the relationship was based on careless fun and no commitment while in this case I'm forced to get the "full package" and my brain cant move to cave mode when needed.

 

[RobbyDog]

I can very much relate to the OP. I was married for 6 years (to a nut job admittedly) and felt trapped. I have little to no desire to be in a relationship since then—aside from regular sex, I don’t see what benefits being with a woman provides. Guess I value my freedom and independence above all else. Maybe meeting the right woman would change my perspective but that hasn’t happened yet.

On the other hand, my family lives close and my kids are still young. When my parents are gone and kids are grown, I could see being lonely without a partner.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I understand what you mean but I believe it really depends on the person.

In my late 30s I already miss my late 20s...I'm genuinely concerned about my 50s unless I reach a zen state mindset.

The simple fact that all the women that show me signs of interest are doing it driven from the goal of a relationship is a huge pain compared to when it was genuine physical and personal attraction.

I am late 30’s. I don’t miss my late 20’s save for that I am doing my thing with 3 kids in tow. That’s a big difference in life situation obviously but if I didn’t have them I wouldn’t be hurting.

 

[eli77]

Congrats how long have you been a member of this forum i'm pretty sure you have learned a lot.

 

[NorwegianDJ]

I find it quite interesting how you and others in this thread are in relationships where you hide your true intentions from your beloved.
Your real desires, feelings, and the very real thoughts you have about the tangible configurations of the relationship you're having.

Have you ever considered that you will die?
Do you want to go through life like this?
Because you really don't have to play mind-games with people if you can just build trusting and loving relationships with connection and belonging, and real foundation for shared joy and peace and support.

If what you want is to have the thrill of the chase, then bring that truth to light and soon enough you will be back doing what you wanted.
You might find yourself repeating a pattern.
Perhaps start asking yourself questions, those that you tend to avoid. Nothing will change until you learn your lessons.

Without dwelling on that, there is a very simple attachment framework that you can study.
You sound like you're experiencing avoidant attachment. Do you want to attach in this damaged way for the rest of your life?
Do you want to keep pushing those closest to you away and not trust other people to have your best interest at heart?
You'll have to decide if you want to walk this rugged path with her or with someone else.
Be a real man and make a choice, as we say in these parts.

and perhaps try to be honest and empathic, instead of kind. There is no kindness in white lies and masked faces.

 

[BadWatermelon]

@Fortune_favors_the_bold do you and her have any common interests? It sounds like you don't have a lot of things you like to do together.

 

[BadWatermelon]

There was an Andrew Tate video where he talked about how much sh*t guys put up with every day when they go to work, and a good woman will help her man relax when he comes home. A bad one will add more fuel to the fire and give him more things to do.

 

[eli77]

Congrats man hope it works out for you from what I read you haven't got any girl knocked up yet so that's a plus nowadays

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

@Fortune_favors_the_bold do you and her have any common interests? It sounds like you don't have a lot of things you like to do together.

Yeah thats a further problem, I like to eat the gym and keep activities high intensity but low duration while she has that same virus most women have that requires entire days of low intensity social activities.

For me leaving home in morning and coming back late at night with messed up meals, no rest and non-stop socializing it's worse than jail.

 

[Bingo-Player]

I would rather pick the dry spells and the freedom given the choice.

Its human nature to want what you can't have

I am on the flip side of your coin now and I am exhausted with being single

When you are a single man you have two choices

1) total solitude

2) total extroversion

You go down the solitude route remove yourself from a lot of the bullsh1t that goes on in the dating markets and society in general and you can become best freinds with the TV, your hand and p0rn hub

You go down the extroversion route and you have to become a social butterfly you need to befriend guys to go out and do things with AND then you need to pick up women

Obviously Neither of these lifestyles is particularly sustainable for any prolonged period of time so you end up bouncing back and forth between them hoping to find some happy balance which rarely if ever materialises

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I am fully aware relationships can become stale and boring and its why I advocate picking a partner you are highly physically attracted too

i know this is easier said than done , but if you get a right a relationship can provide a lot of stability

One of my long term partners was a great girlfriend but she didn't have any t1ts , like literally nothing

We used to go on holidays and there would be all of these females with massive (.)(.) and I would feel guilty ASF for wanting to smash them so badly

As men our primary driver for female attraction is their bodies , a woman can have the nicest personality in the world but if she doesn't have the physicality to match eventually you are going to get bored of her and you will lose that drive to sleep wit her

And any man who tells you otherwise is a bare faced liar !

 

[ThisIsSparta]

I am fully aware relationships can become stale and boring and its why I advocate picking a partner you are highly physically attracted too

i know this is easier said than done , but if you get a right a relationship can provide a lot of stability

One of my long term partners was a great girlfriend but she didn't have any t1ts , like literally nothing

We used to go on holidays and there would be all of these females with massive (.)(.) and I would feel guilty ASF for wanting to smash them so badly

As men our primary driver for female attraction is their bodies , a woman can have the nicest personality in the world but if she doesn't have the physicality to match eventually you are going to get bored of her and you will lose that drive to sleep wit her

And any man who tells you otherwise is a bare faced liar !

I tell you otherwise, call me a liar!

EVERY pvssy is getting stale at some point, no matter how hot you think it is for the first couple of months.
The grass will allways be greener on the other side of the fence after you fvcked that same pvssy 200 times.
After you rubbed your dyck against that big boobs for a year, you will find out that her friend has a quite nice azz youd like to pound a lot more then your GFs, even if she has smaller boobs then your GF.
The only way to succeed in a relationship is to make peace with the fact that there will allways be attraction to unknown pvssy.

If you pick a girl foremost by her looks, you will be fighting an uphill battle all the time in this LTR.

Choosing a girl by her looks as first criteria will not provide a lot of stability to your life.

For LTR, the wise man chooses the girl he likes best amongst the girls that hallow the ground he walks on.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I find it quite interesting how you and others in this thread are in relationships where you hide your true intentions from your beloved.
Your real desires, feelings, and the very real thoughts you have about the tangible configurations of the relationship you're having.

Have you ever considered that you will die?
Do you want to go through life like this?
Because you really don't have to play mind-games with people if you can just build trusting and loving relationships with connection and belonging, and real foundation for shared joy and peace and support.

If what you want is to have the thrill of the chase, then bring that truth to light and soon enough you will be back doing what you wanted.
You might find yourself repeating a pattern.
Perhaps start asking yourself questions, those that you tend to avoid. Nothing will change until you learn your lessons.

Without dwelling on that, there is a very simple attachment framework that you can study.
You sound like you're experiencing avoidant attachment. Do you want to attach in this damaged way for the rest of your life?
Do you want to keep pushing those closest to you away and not trust other people to have your best interest at heart?
You'll have to decide if you want to walk this rugged path with her or with someone else.
Be a real man and make a choice, as we say in these parts.

and perhaps try to be honest and empathic, instead of kind. There is no kindness in white lies and masked faces.

Bro, go to a wedding with your girl as her plus one, have her post the photo for the first time on Instagram and give you keys to her place that morning, and then watch her brothers college friend put his hands on her for like 4 straight hours in a just-distant-enough kind of way, as a guy who she knew for a decade and said ‘my mom said he’s very handsome’ and said that he’s been stringing his girl along and cheating on her constantly for a decade… and then see if you’re still on board with your thought process…. Dating is chess and / or psychological warfare