After 6 months she ended it. (First time I've been dumped)

[Dark Haired Alpha]

Originally posted by frivolousz21
so then I suppose we have to distinct between someone in love and not in love:

OF COURSE WE DO HAVE TO!

Love is a feeling that doesn't disappear suddenly just because of lack of challenge (as you said before). BUT on the other hand, interest, attraction or whatever you call it - simply feelings that arent strong enough to be called love - MAY drop because of it.

That's the difference between people in love and not in love that made your post irrelevant

 

[nishbuk]

Desdinova, thank you.

It's good that there is a place here on the net that you can come irrespective of your friends to let it all out.

But I have a question. How do you deal if you find out that she's seeing someone else? This hasn't happened, but I think that it would be hard for me if it did.

Forgot to mention, that I met her through my best friend's sister. Before we went out I had only seen on about 4 occassions, two of which we didn't talk. I guess the major point is that I can never be totally cut off from this girl. Sometime down the road, I may find out that she's dating someone, or something else about her, because we have a 2nd order connection.

Theres a little more to the story as well.
First, I don't think she's going to ask for me back...She never had good interest to begin with, and even though she was a caring person, and she did like me, it wasn't spectacular for her. Also, she's experienced, probably 10-11 guys, so that's another reason she wouldn't come back.
And even if she did, I would be obligated by my self-respect to say no, right? As much as it hurts...

So the rest of the story is that me, being the romantic that I am, was saving up all the little movie stubs, restaurant receipts, menus, and other things from the dates that we had been on. Now, I know better than to give her gifts, so this would have been an anniversary thing only.
Anyway, before she broke up with me, her and her mom gave me two ridiculous pity gifts. A Wallet with my name and the year embroidered on it, with $10, and a chess set with $50 in it. Weird pity gifts eh? This was the day before.

So when it happened, I made up my mind to give her everything that she gave me over the time, and all the other stuff to her.

So I left all her crap at her best friend's house for her to pickup, including the $60, the pity gifts, and all the other gifts. But, as an added bonus, I put the box containing the movie stubs, restaurant receipts etc in there as well. Hahaha. I guess I'm just going for maximum impact now. Oh well, so what if it's cruel, I don't give a ****.
If that's not an "I loved you, but now you lost me, too bad, your loss", then I don't know what is.

 

[italostud]

Originally posted by nishbuk

Anyway, before she broke up with me, her and her mom gave me two ridiculous pity gifts. A Wallet with my name and the year embroidered on it, with $10, and a chess set with $50 in it. Weird pity gifts eh? This was the day before.

Go out to the strippers. Take the $60(or your own $60, doesn't matter), get an awesome lapdance. Get a buddy to take some pics. Try to get a pic of you sucking on the stripper's nipple while you give a thumbs up to the camera.

Put the pics inside an envelope and write "What I did with your $60" on the outside. Leave it in their mailbox.

 

[Desdinova]

But I have a question. How do you deal if you find out that she's seeing someone else?

Yeah, that can be a difficult one sometimes. Just keep in mind that she made her choice. She didn't want to be with you, and she's gonna lose out. You can also pity the next guy (and the next, and the next, etc) that she's going to be dating. I can only imagine how damn frustrated my ex's new boyfriends are with her in bed. She was horrible.

Forgot to mention, that I met her through my best friend's sister.

Try to keep things on your terms for a while with your best friend until you've pretty much moved on from her. Invite him over, invite him out with your friends, etc. After a while, you won't give a damn when her name is mentioned.

First, I don't think she's going to ask for me back

When a man finishes breaking off a relationship, she's going to be thinking about him. She'll know she can't have him because he's dedicated himself to better things. That's when she'll desire to be part of those better things. Women hate it when their men (or ex-men) can easily survive without them. I highly doubt you've heard the last from her.

So I left all her crap at her best friend's house for her to pickup, including the $60, the pity gifts, and all the other gifts. But, as an added bonus, I put the box containing the movie stubs, restaurant receipts etc in there as well.

Okay, you're an a55hole, but that's cool. I didn't give any of my 5hit back. I kept it and eventually threw it out when I was ready to move on. I only gave her back what she asked for. She left a message, wanting to meet up to get her stuff back, but I didn't give her that satisfaction. I left stuff with her sister and used the mail. Needless to say, she wanted back. I didn't take her, and that's another story on its own.

 

[nishbuk]

Originally posted by Desdinova
Yeah, that can be a difficult one sometimes. Just keep in mind that she made her choice. She didn't want to be with you, and she's gonna lose out. You can also pity the next guy (and the next, and the next, etc) that she's going to be dating. I can only imagine how damn frustrated my ex's new boyfriends are with her in bed. She was horrible.

Funny. Sounds like my girl. She wasn't "horrible", of course I don't really have a reference point with which to compare, but I can safely say that she wasn't awesome.

Try to keep things on your terms for a while with your best friend until you've pretty much moved on from her. Invite him over, invite him out with your friends, etc. After a while, you won't give a damn when her name is mentioned.

This is no problem. My best friend is also a reader at this site, and knows what it's like. He's already helping me.

When a man finishes breaking off a relationship, she's going to be thinking about him. She'll know she can't have him because he's dedicated himself to better things. That's when she'll desire to be part of those better things. Women hate it when their men (or ex-men) can easily survive without them. I highly doubt you've heard the last from her.

Almost for sure you have more experience than me, so I'll take your word for it. But I'm still not so sure. And if she does, please give me the strength not to AFC back into her hands...I don't know if I would beable to resist. I mean she was never a *****, never treated me ****ty, and let me do my own ****.

Okay, you're an a55hole, but that's cool. I didn't give any of my 5hit back. I kept it and eventually threw it out when I was ready to move on. I only gave her back what she asked for. She left a message, wanting to meet up to get her stuff back, but I didn't give her that satisfaction. I left stuff with her sister and used the mail. Needless to say, she wanted back. I didn't take her, and that's another story on its own.

hahahaha. Just what I was going for. Hopefully she got the message. Well, she's had the stuff for at least a day now, and no word. I guess my new attitude should be, "Who the **** cares". Hard to come by though. It's only been 4 days. Give me a week or two.

Thanks, Des. Your posts, pook's posts, and Giovanni's posts always seem to relate to my style better. I enjoy reading them.