Obviously you've never been married. Or if you were, you either had a semi-sane ex-wife who wasn't looking to ruin your life, didn't have kids, didn't have anything to give away at the time or any combination of these items. Most women, if you have anything and you have kids, they're lazy, entitled and generally don't give a crap about the man. Your money? Gone, at least half. It doesn't matter what state you live in at this point, the woman, even if she's the biggest b*tch in the world, is entitled to half, pure and simple. Even if you signed an "air-tight" prenup, the judge can wipe their butt with it and throw that out in a second, especially if there are kids involved.
And yep, your kids? Gone, at least for the few days a month that you're allowed to see them. Oh, but you're still responsible for paying through the nose for them. And when they reach their adult years, after years of mental programming by mom, are probably not going to like and/or respect you very much. All of this co-parenting nonsense, that's all it is, nonsense. How many guys you know, ex or not, are going to be thrilled with the thought of mom bringing some other guy into the house to play dad and bang her in the bed you paid for? Right, about none.
Marriage is a minefield. Look, take it from someone who's played that game twice and lost both times. Me, I had a longing for a partner, a companion, a built in f*ck buddy but that doesn't exist anymore. Women don't do things for the good of the family, they do things for the good of themselves. Back before you could walk the guy into court and screw him royally, there was some type of loyalty but it was mostly forced. If women left back then, good kids, goodbye finances, hello shrew world. Is there genuine love between spouses at this point? Sure, I peg that percentage around 15%, maybe 20% max. There's also probably about 20-25% that are functional in some way. That usually means the guy has to give in but he does so for the good of his family and the good of his wallet. And that gets you to right around the 50% mark. Take another 15-20% of people, mostly men again, that can somehow stand being miserable every day and that takes you to right around 50-65% of people that can make it through marriage for some extended period of time.
Me, I probably fall somewhere into the functional/miserable categories. My wife? She's tolerable around, if I'm lucky, 50% of the time during good periods and about 30% of time during the bad ones. She touchy, entitled, unavailable and generally difficult to be around at least half of the time and that's when she's in a good mood. Now why may you ask, do I tolerate that? Because I'm stupid and didn't have a prenup. I'll admit, my career was mediocre at best when we got together and has since flourished, all on my work as she's a stay at home mom (we agreed to that but I wasn't aware of the person I was dealing with, I know though, big mistake but we wanted a traditional household. At least a traditional household by her standards, I do all the work and she does all the momming and ignores me). So now, I have someone who lives with me and raises the kids. I work a good bit, so I don't get to interact as much as I want but I still make it to all functions, play with them pretty much every day and enjoy, to some degree, being a dad. It's tough to enjoy when you try to parent with someone who you're supposed to be married to but acts more as an acquaintance who tolerates you being there because you contribute the funds to make it all work.
So days revolve around the kids and nights I'm on my own. She slips up to bed around ten, the kids went to sleep around nine and if I'm lucky some nights, she might deign to speak with me for a few minutes before she inexorably says she's exhausted and either falls asleep on the couch or goes right to bed. I literally can't sleep in bed with her because she snores like a freight train and if I did, I'd never get any sleep. Doesn't matter anyway because she allows the kids to sleep in bed with her every night. I literally get no companionship, next to no s*x either. Would I leave if I didn't have kids or money on the line? IN A STONE COLD SECOND!!!!!! But it's not that simple.
Now I say all of this, at least I'm venting to some degree, because it's not fair to judge him. He admits he's not a great buy, may or may not be true I don't know, but it's insanely difficult to stay in a "monogamous" relationship when he may very well not have any companionship or s*x in his marriage. If he doesn't, I'm not going to blame him all that much. You can stand on the sidelines and say, "Oh, you should leave and play the field" but as I've already said, it's not that simple, not by a long shot. Feel free to snipe away.
