Advice for rAFC's

[Scorpion11]

Hello fellow DJ's!

I was the AFC of the century from when I was 12 to this last year when I was 19.

Now, while reading the DJ Bible, all the quick tips (all 3,000 of them), reading Doc Love, and reading what is posted up here, I have begun turning things around, and it has helped me tremendously! I would like to thank you guys for that. It has helped me with the mentality, attitude, outlook, and what to wear, shoes, cologne, etc...

The only problem is after reading up and seeing what to do, I look at work and school where I tend to always think it will be girls, girls, girls.

After being AFC so long, I tend to slip back into the AFC tendancies, like lack of confidence, not as much eye contact (that is improving), failure to make number close, and every know and then, losing the conversation to some blond haired punk which pisses me off to no end!

I'm not posting this board to be negative, not in the least, it looks as if it is heading in the right direction.

Right now, it seems as if I'm still not getting the #'s and results that I wanted and expected. I know much is a choice, I just wish the habits I'm trying to get rid of will quit bringing me down!

I hear it takes time, but how much time??? Any advice from DJ's on this forum would be a great help!

Thanks for everything!

S11

 

[So pimp its scary]

I went through 3 years without a date at one point (yet most of the times I would be like "I need a gf")

I've been improving for over 8 months now... I went from nothing to being able to get dates fairly consistently... I've been having more fun this past year (which I dubbed 'year of the pimp', but that's another story)

Take a break at first, that's what I did for my first month, I completely abstained from women. Then, the next 2 months were just building up confidence through practice...

I get my ups and downs... (I agree with the yo-yo'd staircase of success theory, where you improve the yo-yo goes up, then comes down lower, but boosts up higher then it was originally, ad infinitum)

Just keep doing what your doing.

 

[Scorpion11]

I'm just glad I quit taking the advice "just be who you are, one girl will come along!"

 

[rastlin2021]

2 steps forward, one step backwards, 2 steps forward etc...

thats the learning curve...

 

[Doppler4000]

It's a marathon, not a sprint.

 

[Survivor]

Three questions:

1) Have you been working out? What are your eating habits?

2) What are your career goals and aspirations?

3) Are you in an enviroment where everyone sees each other everyday, like a small college campus or a gossipy work office?

I ask those things because I want to be really specific in the advice I give you.

 

[Scorpion11]

I edited this part, I think i clicked enter too soon... My reply is below.

 

[Scorpion11]

Survivor,

1) Have you been working out? What are your eating habits?

I'm not overweight at all, my met rate is actually pretty good and i'm lucky to have it the way i do. However, I dont work out as much as I need too. That is moreso time than anything, I'm so consumed with everything else.

2) What are your career goals and aspirations?

Right now I'm majoring in Broadcast Journalism. Last year, I served as an intern at the local FOX affiliate and loved it. The semester before that I got into it, and am constantly honing my skills at not only announcing, but shooting, editing, and writing. Since I know that field dosen't pay much, and is hard to break into, I know I will need a back-up plan. For me, it will probably be either something w/ computers, or advertising. Anyways, I'd like to go in for news, weather, or sports. At this time, I feel sports is my calling.

3) Are you in an enviroment where everyone sees each other everyday, like a small college campus or a gossipy work office?

On Mondays and Wednesday, I commute to a small 2yr school about 30 miles away from my hometown. All other days, I work as a checker at our local grocery store. The town I live in is small, and the population is 9K.


Thanks for the advice!

S11

 

[Scorpion11]

...

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by Scorpion11
...

Indeed.

 

[Tano]

Hey can someone post the thread link for the 3000 Quick Tips

 

[ZeeOwl]

Is was AFC from ages 14 to 36. Consider myself RAFC since then (I'm 40 now), the most noticeable improvement being over the past 6 months since I started reading this board. I bought David D's DYD eBook, and I'm starting DJ Boot Camp too. It takes time and effort, but the difference is almost scary.

I've had more dates in the past 3 months than in my entire life previously. Back in my AFC days, I would get maybe 1 date a month when I tried really hard and got lucky. Now I'm getting an average of 2 a week with moderate effort. Could get more (3 or 4), but I have to work too. I've reached the stage where I'm comfortable and pretty good at initial approach, and phone skills for setting up the 1st date. I'm still struggling with the 1st date stage at the moment, getting it to go well enough to consistently get to a 2nd. My track record for this stage still sucks (about 10%), but I'm improving. See my 1st field report:
http://sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=38382
if you want details.

 

[Survivor]

I'm not overweight at all, my met rate is actually pretty good and i'm lucky to have it the way i do. "However, I dont work out as much as I need too. That is moreso time than anything, I'm so consumed with everything else."

Try to make a little more time for exercise. I'm in grad school and work full-time myself so I understand how you don't have the time to be a gym rat. I usually do at least some calestinics(sp?) before the end of the day. Preferably I go to the local Ballys and use free weights.

The reason this is important is because your physical state has a profound influence on what you communicate to people through your shape and posture.

Right now I'm majoring in Broadcast Journalism. Last year, I served as an intern at the local FOX affiliate and loved it.

Good. You have your head set on straight. The reason I asked is because alot of guys come here majoring in Xbox and internet porn... and still wonder why they can't get laid...

You're at a point where young women aren't going to have much appreciation for what your'e trying to accomplish with your life. To them you're just another loser trying to get in their pants. But be patient, your time is coming. Keep learing and keep growing.

On Mondays and Wednesday, I commute to a small 2yr school about 30 miles away from my hometown. All other days, I work as a checker at our local grocery store. The town I live in is small, and the population is 9K.

Now lets put this in perspective. Theres 30 miles between your school and your hometown. That means you have about a fifteen mile radius from which to attract at least ONE interested and available female.

Don't limit yourself to just your school and hometown. Find new places to socialize within your 15 mile radius.

My advice is twofold. Increase your ability to attract females by improving your physical appearance and overall health. Increase your ability to retain females by not limiting your self to the same "pickup environments". Be creative. Go to place where no one knows you and meet NEW people. Meet NEW women. In fact you can make a field report of your adventures much like ZeeOwl and others here have done.

From what it sounds like, you're gonna be just fine.

 

[So pimp its scary]

Originally posted by Survivor
Good. You have your head set on straight. The reason I asked is because alot of guys come here majoring in Xbox and internet porn... and still wonder why they can't get laid...

My advice is twofold. Increase your ability to attract females by improving your physical appearance and overall health. Increase your ability to retain females by not limiting your self to the same "pickup environments". Be creative. Go to place where no one knows you and meet NEW people. Meet NEW women. In fact you can make a field report of your adventures much like ZeeOwl and others here have done.

From what it sounds like, you're gonna be just fine.

This is some solid advice... can I use "Alot of guys come here majoring in Xbox and internet porn... and still wonder why they can't get laid..." as part of my sig? That is just great.

 

[Scorpion11]

This last week was good (although I was still unable to make a # closes.. we'll get to that later)...

There's this one 24 y/o in my class, about 4 yrs older than me, the only way I know her is that she's dating an inlaw. It still helps my confidence tremendously talking to her. I went w/ her to lunch the other day. I wouldn't really call it a date and there, I didn't feel much pressure either. It was still an awesome step forward though.

Work on tuesday went good as well, some DJ on this board wanted me to try something out talking to the girls in the store, that succeeded as well.

There's this one chick in my 2:30 class, says she used to be work for Hooter's, she may be on the local colleges pom squad, and whatnot.... she's freakin hot on top of that! I don't have oneitis w/ her, don't get me wrong, I was just trying to figure out how to get to her, especially since she's getting hit on my this one kid all the time... ya know, one of those kids you'd want to chunk a snowball at whenever the time comes.... I seem to not be able to # close w/ her, If she didn't show a remotely high IL, I wouldn't even be giving it second thought....

Finally, in my last class, theres been this one girl in there that I've been interested in since the yr started, she has a bf, but it seems as if I've been growing on her lately. There's other hot chicks in there, but I'm always seemingly pursued by the fat ones. And yes, I know, they hit on me cause noone will hit on them.

Yes I've been working out a tad bit more, but I gotta ask, in this part of the country (West TX), where can I go to meet all the hunnies? Lubbock's the nearest big town, and it's around 40 miles away... any creative ideas on where to meet girls? .. that's not bars and clubs... one idea was the Baptist Student Union.. I've been going there the last 2 years, and finally I use it as a chance to meet girls... despite the fact I haven't had the chance the last couple of weeks, to go up and # close.

I just feel that's the only thing I can't get done, and I feel as if it's holding me back..

The advice on SS is phenominal, dont get me wrong, I'm just ready to start stocking up on chicks...

I hear it takes time, but how much??

Once aagin, all advice would be appreciated!

S11

P.S. What the heck does C&F stand for?

 

[quakerstate]

Should not ask how long. Keep going learn from every mistake and constantly improve till you're a GOD.

 

[Scorpion11]

somehow it feels as if I haven't been able to make it in the zone

 

[deeman]

c&f =****y and funny.
Keep on pushing bro!

 

[Survivor]

Well you could transfer to Texas Tech and your problems would be solved! (just kidding.)

But seriously, don't worry about how long your progrssion may take. You'll only frustrate yourself. Just take one day at a time.

 

[Scorpion11]

I believe one of my biggest barriers so far is wondering whether I'm turning red or not... I really dont believe my face is changing colours, but that it still looms in my mind as it did from my old days. AFCism is like an addiction.