Advice for frustrated virgins from an older dude.

[HowardRoarkLaughed]

Apologies if this has come up before.

This is addressed to you younger guys who haven't gotten any yet and are letting that fact get you down...

Even if you are frustrated and sad, banging the first piece that lets you can come back to haunt you later. It can cause mental anguish in the long run!

Don't go for that androgynous, bi, wiccan girl, or the but-her-face, or the semi-retarded, or the desperate fatty, or the feminist smelly hippy, etc...

I know you want to feel yourself inside a girl so badly, but think twice before f*cking beneath you. I did it, but now that I've gotten more "DJ" and have a better opinion of myself, I regret gracing that poor excuse for a woman with my body. She didn't deserve it. And I hate thinking about that fact ever since, especially being reminded of it while with a deserving woman.

...Just something to think about.

 

[Pete_C]

Originally posted by HowardRoarkLaughed
Apologies if this has come up before.

This is addressed to you younger guys who haven't gotten any yet and are letting that fact get you down...

Even if you are frustrated and sad, banging the first piece that lets you can come back to haunt you later. It can cause mental anguish in the long run!

Don't go for that androgynous, bi, wiccan girl, or the but-her-face, or the semi-retarded, or the desperate fatty, or the feminist smelly hippy, etc...

I know you want to feel yourself inside a girl so badly, but think twice before f*cking beneath you. I did it, but now that I've gotten more "DJ" and have a better opinion of myself, I regret gracing that poor excuse for a woman with my body. She didn't deserve it. And I hate thinking about that fact ever since, especially being reminded of it while with a deserving woman.

...Just something to think about.

I disagree on this. If they throw themself at you, why not use uglies and fatties to practice sexual or DJ technique? Puzzy is puzzy, better than jerking off to your computer screen.

 

[California Love]

Re: Re: Advice for frustrated virgins from an older dude.

Originally posted by Pete_C
I disagree on this. If they throw themself at you, why not use uglies and fatties to practice sexual or DJ technique? Puzzy is puzzy, better than jerking off to your computer screen.

dude....no way.

 

[RabidDog]

Im 28, so naturally older than you.

I AM NOT AN "OLDER DUDE" !!!

8asterd

 

[Hubris]

Losing my virginity helped my game *so* much it wasn't even funny.

Guys need to lose it to get rid of that 'magic' 'disney' 'love' BS.

 

[jdr120]

I'm gonna have to agree with howard on this... I would rather go without than lower my standards to some ugly-fatty, that when I wake up in the morning, I have to sneak her out of the house so my roomates don't see her.... uh.. not that's ever happened...

I now use this piece of advice...

"A true DJ safe guards his morals, ideals, and self-respect"
- somewhere in the bible

 

[Don_Marko]

of course roark would say that

"Tell me what a man finds sexually attractive
and I will tell you his entire philosophy of life. Show me the woman he sleeps with and I will tell you his valuation of himself. No matter what corruption he’s taught about the virtue of selflessness, sex is the most profoundly selfish of all acts, an act which he cannot perform for any motive but his own enjoyment... He will always be attracted to the woman who reflects his deepest vision of himself, the woman whose surrender permits him to experience—or to fake—a sense of self-esteem. The man who is proudly certain of his own value, will want the highest type of woman he can find, the woman he admires, the strongest, the hardest to conquer—because only the possession of a heroine will give him the sense of an achievement, not the possession of a brainless slut. .. He does not seek to gain his value, he seeks to express it. There is no conflict between the standards of his mind and the desires of his body. But the man who is convinced of his own worthlessness will be drawn to a woman he despises—because she will reflect his own secret self, she will release him from that objective reality in which he is a fraud, she will give him a momentary illusion of his own value and a momentary escape from the moral code that damns him."


I know I posted this before... but it's worth it

EDIT: Actually there's more
The other kind of half is the man whom people call practical,
the man who despises principles, abstractions, art, philosophy and his own mind. He regards the acquisition of material objects as the only goal of existence—and he laughs at the need to consider their purpose or their source. He expects them to give him pleasure—and he wonders why the more he gets, the less he feels. He is the man who spends his time chasing women. Observe the triple fraud which he perpetrates upon himself. He will not acknowledge his need of self-esteem, since he scoffs at such a concept as moral values; yet he feels the profound self-contempt which comes from believing that he is a piece of meat. He will not acknowledge, but he knows that sex is the physical expression of a tribute to personal values. So he tries, by going through the motions of the effect, to acquire that which should
have been the cause. He tries to gain a sense of his own value from the women who surrender to him—and he forgets that the women he picks have neither character nor judgment nor standard of value. He tells himself that all he’s after is physical pleasure—but observe that he tires of his women in a week or a night, that he despises professional *****s and that he loves to
imagine he is seducing virtuous girls who make a great exception for his sake. It is the feeling of achievement that he seeks and never finds. What glory can there be in the conquest of a mindless body?”

 

[Juan_Man]

I agree with Pete. Sex is sex. I know a lot guys here are probably banging uglies, claiming that they are HBs. If you were willing to have sex with them, then there has to have been some attraction. Who cares if the quality isn't always that high? Just get over yourself and move on.

 

[dietzcoi]

I have to agree with Don Marco and the others who say you should NOT fukk any UGs...

I did it when I was AFC and it is true, I had low self esteem.

But those days are over.....

Dietzcoi

 

[Dirtheart]

I totally agree with Howard. I didn't lose my virginity until my early 20s and am pleased to say all the women I've had sex with have been very attractive, have found me attractive and we wanted to see each other again.

The man who is proudly certain of his own value, will want the highest type of woman he can find

Don Marko summed it up nicely for me right here.

A lot of people use sex as a way of proving their appeal (mainly to themselves). But if ugly girls can get sex and ugly guys can get sex, how does having sex prove your appeal?

Besides, surely desperation is a very AFC mentality, whereas refusing sex proves you have self-control, value, nothing to prove and are selective.

 

[Don_Marko]

I can't take credit for that... it's a quote from Ayn Rand

 

[chicksrock]

thanks howard,
advice is taken!

 

[JSH]

Originally posted by Don_Marko
regards the acquisition of material objects as the only goal of existence—and he laughs at the need to consider their purpose or their source.

He expects them to give him pleasure—and he wonders why the more he gets, the less he feels.

profound self-contempt which comes from believing that he is a piece of meat.

He will not acknowledge, but he knows that sex is the physical expression of a tribute to personal values.

It is the feeling of achievement that he seeks and never finds. What glory can there be in the conquest of a mindless body?” [/B]

Note: i am not advoccating ****in UGs.
Bullsh1t,

a) why cant a person believe having a materially comfortable life is all that is important to him. Purpose and source are often irrelevent. (btw i am not in favour of instant gratification)

b) the more he gets the less he feels is because of supply and demand. the more he has of a particular commodity, the less rare it is, therefore the less enjoyment it gives him.

c) he does not believe he is a piece of meat if he chases after what he wants.

d) "sex is the physical expression of a tribute to personal values." Sex does not have to be expression. Physical expression of a TRIBUTE to personal values, i mean wtf.

Im sorry but most of that was a load of mindless waffle.

 

[Don_Marko]

a) why cant a person believe having a materially comfortable life is all that is important to him. Purpose and source are often irrelevent. (btw i am not in favour of instant gratification)

Because a man thinks, feels and hopefully has a soul somewhere inside him.
I think Tyler Durden was right when he said, amongs other gems that you can't be free unless you lose everything, you are not your clothes you are not your car and u are not ur fking sofa (something like that) things you own end up owning you, and that advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate to buy more sh!it we don't need.
Nothing is wrong with pursuing a better lifestyle, however if your material possession defines you as a person... then u are fvcked

b) the more he gets the less he feels is because of supply and demand. the more he has of a particular commodity, the less rare it is, therefore the less enjoyment it gives him.

Or maybe because the commodity (dumb way to reffer about women but OK) is virtually worthless, he doesn't pursue the quality.

c) he does not believe he is a piece of meat if he chases after what he wants.

If he chases after what he wants just because of her pvssy, then he is chasing a piece of meat. However if he goes after other qualities then he isn't.

d)Physical expression of a TRIBUTE to personal values, i mean wtf.

Simply means that what you value deep inside is what you find attractive and sexy. If you have no values then you will be attracted to anything that walks.

Capish?

 

[malestrom]

I totally agree with Don_Marko.

I've been around this PUA/DJ game since 1997 when it was just Ross Jeffries and a small community on the A.S.F newsgroup. This was at age 19.


Since that time, I've seen some pretty amazing things. Guys banging NFL cheerleaders, playmates, professional models, etc. However, in those seven years, I've also done alot of soul-searching and questioning the motives of why men do what they do. (btw, ALL people do this at some point in their lives).

As it stands right now, it seems that the so-called "best PUA's" are actually only slightly motivated by genuine sexual desire. In fact, a vast majority of these men are motivated by raging personal insecurities, sexual hangups, deep feelings of inferiority and a sense of inadequacy. Some of them also display a degree of self-hatred. Combine all of this together and you have men with an almost compulsive need to prove something to themselves and the world by having sex with women. For many of them, this lifestyle is the lynchpin that holds their masculine identity and social-life together. Take women out of the picture and their concept of self is, at best, a blurry image. I suspect many of them are terrified they're not authentic men and have learned to put on a good show by constantly flaunting the notches in their bedpost.

Granted, I'm not saying this is true FOR ALL men who do well with women. But in my experiance, the men who've bagged over 100+ women almost always exude alot of self-loathing. They try to mask it with a kind of pseudo-confidence and vanity, but I've learned to see who's the real deal and who isn't.

All of this peacocking "jerk" bull$hit comes from this type of insecure thinking. And the "Alpha Male" garbage isn't too far behind it. Whenever I read about some guy "being a jerk" to a girl or whatever, I ask myself what he's doing with that kind of woman in the first place.

I aspire to be a man of class, humility and quiet confidence. I also aspire to be polite and respectful of my fellow man. The imposters will tell you this is AFC thinking, but the real question is: what does the imposter have to prove by purposely NOT being this way?
Those who have arrived at the place of TRUE success know that those running around "being a jerk" is a sure sign that an imposter is in the midst. Reason being that if a man has to TRY that hard, he doesn't possess what he desperately wants other to think he has gained.

Interestingly, the more that I am this way, the less trashy girls are attracted to me and the more high-quality, high-caliber women want to spend time with me.

 

[HowardRoarkLaughed]

Or maybe because the commodity (dumb way to reffer about women but OK) is virtually worthless, he doesn't pursue the quality.

I've been trying to decide what I think about this concept (women's bodies as commodities) for a long time.

I have this fear of dating a girl for a while, thinking she is cool and possible LTR material, eventually getting physical after about 6 dates...Then I later find out that she was flashing her tits for beads at last years Mardi Gras. So in effect, I had to do a lot of work to receive a value (her nakedness) which she herself had previously given away free to a mob of strangers. I would sorta have a sense of being ripped off.

This has never happened to me but I often wonder how I would react to this scenario.

And this is what I was touching on by starting this thread; my own self as a commodity that I gave to an undeserving girl.
I had been doing a lot of work on my body, exercising and such. I would always drive myself to exercise longer and harder by imagining that if I did 10 more push-ups, or ran 500 more yards, or whatever, I'd get whatever girl I had a crush on at the time. I was working on myself for myself, but I also wanted to look good for whoever I ended up with in the future. I got frustrated though, in my AFC-ness, and banged a girl I shouldn't of, who didn't deserve to be the beneficiary of all the work I had put in. That's what I regret. I sold myself short.

I may just be thinking about everything too much, but that's how I feel.

 

[Viking25]

I agree with Howard on this issue 100%!!!!!!!!
Some of you may have read my tread about me fukking this UG...and I felt so low after that. It was all about my low self esteem.
Don't sell your self short guys!!!!!

 

[ShortTimer]

Re: Re: Re: Advice for frustrated virgins from an older dude.

Originally posted by Pete_C
I disagree on this. If they throw themself at you, why not use uglies and fatties to practice sexual or DJ technique? Puzzy is puzzy, better than jerking off to your computer screen.

Originally posted by California Love
dude....no way.

I think Howard and Cali are right on this one: it can be a major blow to the self-esteem to sleep with (hell I'd even say kiss) the wrong girl the first time. Or any time for that matter.

Having sex with the UG's would be like trying to eat your own vomit. No thanks, I'll starve.

 

[Ol'BlueEyes]

I'll add to this...

I know you want to feel yourself inside a girl so badly, but think twice before f*cking beneath you. I did it, but now that I've gotten more "DJ" and have a better opinion of myself, I regret gracing that poor excuse for a woman with my body. She didn't deserve it. And I hate thinking about that fact ever since, especially being reminded of it while with a deserving woman.

I'd like to add:
When the moment finally comes (pun intended), be prepared mentally.
I remember I was totally blown away that I was in the same room with a hot naked chick for the first time. I had no clue how to proceed. Back in my AFC days I was so convinced I'd be a virgin for the rest of my life I couldn't envision myself actually doing the deed. I couldn't do it. Needless to say, I didn't hit it that night; I also didn't have a condom on me, so it might've been a good thing.

 

[Don_Marko]

Originally posted by malestrom

All of this peacocking "jerk" bull$hit comes from this type of insecure thinking. And the "Alpha Male" garbage isn't too far behind it. Whenever I read about some guy "being a jerk" to a girl or whatever, I ask myself what he's doing with that kind of woman in the first place.

Very true... if a woman is attracted ONLY to ur a$$holeness, then she's got huge issues as well. Therefore these types are a great match for one other.

I want a woman that can call me on my bull$hit, just as easy as I will call her on hers. The whole point is to bring out the best in one another... right?

Originally posted by HowardRoarkLaughed

I've been trying to decide what I think about this concept (women's bodies as commodities) for a long time.

I have this fear of dating a girl for a while, thinking she is cool and possible LTR material, eventually getting physical after about 6 dates...Then I later find out that she was flashing her tits for beads at last years Mardi Gras. So in effect, I had to do a lot of work to receive a value (her nakedness) which she herself had previously given away free to a mob of strangers. I would sorta have a sense of being ripped off.

Interesting point... the sexiest words I've ever heard from a girl were a long long time ago while we were talking about similar topic: "I was not put on this world to sell myself to the highest bidder"