A word on overthinking.

[Febreze]

Before i post this i realize many are going to say "easier said than done", and i agree, it IS easier said than done, but if you want to improve your life with women and in general, you have to strive towards putting good advice into action.


Overthinking things might be one of the most self-destructive things you can do to yourself when it comes to women. We all do it. We overthink things sometimes such as:

She never called back, does that mean she doesnt like me?

She didnt smile at me when i smiled at her, does it mean im ugly?


You have to program your mind to stop thinking about useless information. If a woman does not call back, then she does not call back. It should not effect your self esteem or anything in your life whatsoever.

The biggest thing i believe most guys overthink is rejections. They will get rejected and think of a myriad of reasons of why it might have been.

Listen to what i am about to say, because it might completly change your attitude towards approaches.

There are SO many reasons you might get turned down it is virtually impossible to list them all. Maybe she is taken, and in that case, who cares? waste of time.

Maybe shes having a bad day. Not your fault. Move on.

Maybe she isnt interested. Who cares? even if she has a negative opinion of your looks or approach does that mean everyone else feels that way? Putting a lot of stock into what one person thinks of you is a surefire way to end up miserable.

In other words, if what you are thinking about is not furthering your success, then STOP IT. It is a waste of time and energy and its destroying you.

 

[Lion]

That's a very important point you have shared with us Febreze.

There are people who think and people who do...
Nothing wrong with thinking about what you can do, but it's important to then follow it up by doing it!

 

[Jblitz59]

I like the part where you talk of not caring SO much of what people think of you.

Who cares? even if she has a negative opinion of your looks or approach does that mean everyone else feels that way? Putting a lot of stock into what one person thinks of you is a surefire way to end up miserable

The type of people who do care a lot of what people think of them are too conservative and have no identity because they are chamelleons to what others like.

Do not be a chamelleon. Be yourself even it means going against people you just met. Being honest may save you from a HUGE waste of time and devotion to a girl NOT even compatible to you.

The risk involved with being yourself is that people may not like you, so be prepared to be unpopular. Thinking back to jesus, he was VERY unpopular with any of the high snobby people, and explosively popular amongst those who needed help mostly those with little power.

Do not risk anything= masturbation

 

[Alle_Gory]

You're over-thinking this over-thinking business.

 

[Febreze]

You're over-thinking this over-thinking business.

very constructive post. i appreciate trying to help and being talked down too.

 

[Man_CA]

Thanks for sharing, that is an excellent article.

 

[The Muscle Guy]

Great post man.

A lot of guys that are new to the game need to hear this.

 

[Groovy]

Some girls will think that you're cool some not..... Where is the difference in you? It's wiser to focus on what every girl likes! Oh and if you approach one chick one day you may get her, other day you may not.... So the problem isn't always the looks. Maybe she isn't feeling well? MAKE her feel well, if your energy is contagious, that affects the interaction a lot. This may seem out of the context a bit, but it's worth mentioning anyway!