A Real Test

NewAndImproved

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 10, 2008
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Last semester I was going after this girl who overtly made it known that she found me attractive. She met my friend soon after and apparently had had a crush on him since freshman year. She didn't seem to be feeling me as much so I threw in the towel. I still went to her parties and one night I caught the eye of her friend. I swooped in and danced w/her the whole night...by the kind of kino and such I just knew I was in. No dice. She literally just left me cold when the party ended. Not a word. Just bounced back to her room. Mind you, this was someone I already "knew" and was friendly with. I was surprised and posted about it here. I invited her to my 21st and she showed good interest. She then initiated convo on facebook too, telling me to ask for her number. Winter break happened soon after and besides a Merry Xmas text, I withheld contact.

The 1st two weeks back I was working on this other girl I had met over break and I'm pretty sure she knew about her (pics, wall posts). She turned out to be nuts and so last week, I reinitiated contact w/this girl and danced w/her at a party. Then I asked her out to dinner and she seemed eager. Amazing what options will do to pique interest. We went out on Tues and it went well. She even saw me talking to this other girl (a friend) when she arrived (3 minutes late) and seemed kinda jealous. So smooth sailing right???

Nope. Last night we met at a party. Dancing, hand holding as we moved around but eventually she wanted to go find her best friend. We still danced but when the music stopped, she just left me w/o a word. I reacted as I did before, not running after her, not saying a word. I caught up w/my boys outside and about 5 minutes later she comes up to me, rubs me on the shoulder and says she's leaving. I just say goodbye.

The only backstory about her I can give you is that she feels that she's been taken advantage of by guys in the past...really disillusioned about romance and such. I can understand her being skeptical of me at first but I felt after really building comfort at dinner, she wouldn't run anymore. On the other hand, maybe I'm acting too indifferent. I'm a recovering social phobic and some of the DJ rules are easy to embrace because of my already ingrained habit of acting aloof, uninterested etc but I've certainly shown interest here. Maybe I should ask why she keeps "running off..." Any thoughts?
 

trd323

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 7, 2005
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SUp homie, So maybe her friend was drunk or in trouble and when SHE came back to you, you basically shood her away?? and you expect her to act lovey dovey with you? Dude man up and find out what happened. and ask her if everything was alright. When people say that you should be indifferent means that her leaving you made no difference, but you still let her know that you care for her. She is skeptical of you; she thought she had this great guy that she had fun with, and when she came back to you, maybe for a strong hand to hold on to; you shunned her away. Damn that was your bad. So, go tell her you are sorry for acting like a douche bag, and say that you wre just worried about where she went and ask her if everything was fine.

Good luck. Show women that you care, ALWAYS
 

TheBucketOfTruth

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 4, 2008
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It doesn't look like she's that interested, but we're not in her head.
You should not have danced with her all night, though. Show that you have other things to do and other people to see.
 
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