A pair of cougars write book about undateable men

[MatureDJ]

http://www.cleveland.com/pdq/index.ssf/2010/03/undateable_guys_get_advice_fro.html

Here's a tidbit:

But there was something wrong: This grown man, this 45-year-old father, had a small square of facial hair growing under his lip, a style known to sweater-wearing poets and Olympic speedskaters as the "soul patch."

"I was sort of like, 'Hmm, not what I would have ordered off the menu. But maybe I can sorta get beyond this,'" she says. "But I just couldn't do it."

Lady, I'm sure that any man who would have a soul patch would have the depth of personality that he would not put up with with your sh!t in any case. :box:

 

[Mr.Positive]

Here's a quote from this article. "Both insist the book is not an attack on guys."

Oh, ok then. :crackup:

Apparantly, they are attempting to use humour to shame men, and get men to jump through hoops for them. To fit 'their' ideals. Typical aversion attempt...and to make money on a worthless book, to boot.

Lady, we get it. All women are the prize to be won. We'll change if you let us.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Another attempted reframe to cast their failure to attract a man on the men themselves.

(Also quite popular on many Internet dating forums...)

I suspect this book will be popular amongst many women who are old and and lonely and have only themselves to blame, but don't want to admit it.

There are a couple of intentions behind putting men down like this. One is to shame men into behaving like women want, as previously stated.

Another is to blame the men for women's shortcomings, and to absolve themselves of any responsibility.

A true victim mentality at it's heart. It's not my fault I'm unhappy, it's the world's fault for not providing for me exactly what I want without having to put forth much effort.

This stems from not adequately making the transition from a child model of the world, where everything is provided for you, to an adult model of the world, where you have to put in the proper effort to get what you want.

 

[MatureDJ]

This stems from not adequately making the transition from a child model of the world, where everything is provided for you, to an adult model of the world, where you have to put in the proper effort to get what you want.

Good point!

 

[Trader]

http://www.cleveland.com/pdq/index.ssf/2010/03/undateable_guys_get_advice_fro.html

Here's a tidbit: But there was something wrong: This grown man, this 45-year-old father, had a small square of facial hair growing under his lip, a style known to sweater-wearing poets and Olympic speedskaters as the "soul patch."

"I was sort of like, 'Hmm, not what I would have ordered off the menu. But maybe I can sorta get beyond this,'" she says. "But I just couldn't do it."

Lady, I'm sure that any man who would have a soul patch would have the depth of personality that he would not put up with with your sh!t in any case. :box:

I don't see anything wrong with that book at all.

But what is fascinating to me, is that when guys talk about THEIR dislikes towards ugly, fat girls, they always end up getting shamed for being superficial.

Girls get to have standards - but in the US, guys don't get to have any at all

 

[jophil28]

I don't see anything wrong with that book at all.

But what is fascinating to me, is that when guys talk about THEIR dislikes towards ugly, fat girls, they always end up getting shamed for being superficial.

Girls get to have standards - but in the US, guys don't get to have any at all

The standards , personal expectations and predudices that you hold are YOURS by design. You shape them, you create them and you own them. They do not need to be rubberstamped by others - especially by women.
I have a heck of a time convincing men that I socialize with to take their thoughts, likes and dislikes, desires and wishes and call them their own.
Seeking women's approval of these relinquishes personal ownership and transfers power to her.
Is it any wonder why women lose respect for men sometimes when we can be told what to like and dislike?

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

I'm sure that any man who would have a soul patch would have the depth of personality that he would not put up with with your sh!t in any case. :box:

HAHAHA What the hell does a soul patch have to do with personality, besides making you look gay?

 

[Zarky]

Didn't you know that a soul patch is the sign of the philosopher? Plato had one

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Zarky,
"Didn't you know that a soul patch is the sign of the philosopher? Plato had one"Reference please.

 

[jonwon]

I can actually agree with some of those, I get a soul patch sometimes when I can’t be arsed to shave that little bit.

I can also agree with:

Fanny packs

Comb-overs

But then as predictable as these things are, it's just a means to have a go at men about pretty much anything.

Playing air guitar, really that much of a big deal – I doubt it.
"booya!" – Any worse than the other catch lines people use? I don’t use Booya and don’t know anyone who does, redundant if you ask me.
Vanity license plates – Slightly agree, and a waste of money imo, but a deal breaker, I highly doubt that, those things aint cheap.

Then it just starts getting silly:
Red flags" - playing video games – Interesting how this type of woman doesn’t like video games, but who wants to bet she has zero problems sitting down to watch Oprah for an hour or Sex and the City for an hour. Women who usually dislike video games, are normally the type of woman who see’s nothing wrong with sitting in-front of the TV for hours on end watching emotional tat.

Storm clouds - arm-wrestling in public or owning nunchucks – Nunchunks I can understand, a man should have gotten over that stage after the age of 13, but arm wrestling? Have you seen the amount of woman who drift to thugs, an arm wrestle is probably the least thuggish thing too.

Kiss of death", like wearing a Speedo or taking a date to Hooters – I go on Holiday a lot, I don’t wear Speedos, it is clear these women are trying to be funny, by imposing this in there – like the visions of Costas with his speedo’s, broken English and hairy chest, but when you actually go on holiday, be prepared to be confronted with men who wear those, with hot women. As for the hooters thing, this is one of the biggest points for me, I’d actually take a woman like this to hooters, just to annoy her – Rather a lot of woman wont mind one iota, some would even find it funny –

Very rigid code, parts that have truth, parts trying to be funny but failing, and other parts just OTT.

Anyway a woman who has 311 things why to not date you, is 1 good enough reason to not date her.

 

[A-Unit]

Re:

Undateable: 311 Things Guys Do That Guarantee They Won't be Dating or Having Sex

So like Pavlov's dogs men should pander to this various list and 'hope' they get laid?

Please.

There isn't one item in this list that is absolute anyways.

•"Red flags" for innocent, fixable mistakes, like clipping your cell phone to your belt or playing video games.

•"Storm clouds" for more serious offenses, like arm-wrestling in public or owning nunchucks.

•"Not getting any" for flaws that end any shot you'll be hiking the Appalachian Trail, like wearing transition sunglasses or tuning into an easy-listening radio station.

•"Kiss of death" for capital crimes, like wearing a Speedo or taking a date to Hooters.


Guys might think the concept is harsh, judgmental -- or both.

"Obviously, the book is meant to be amusing," Coyle says. "We wrote the book almost in the tone of your great big sister who knows you can take it and feels the need to help you out."

There's a serious side, too.

The undateable guy, whether he's wearing Crocs, sipping girlie drinks or naming parts of his anatomy, is a "huge problem," says Coyle.

"I'm going to say, in my personal experience, that 90 percent of guys are undateable," she says. "It's not something I'm happy to report. It doesn't bode well for me

^^^^The fundamental flaw of their whole book is women telling men how to be men. The references they are making in this book are about men not even being men, but most women also want men that are metrosexuals or are borderline-gay. They don't want men; they want what the media pitches at them. Lasered, groomed men that care about style, their feelings, yet are aggressive and take charge; that make a fair to alot of money and can practically read their minds. They have set up idealistic impossibilities.

If this book has even mediocre sales, we might as well colab on a project to tell women how to be more like our favorite pornstars and hollywood sluts, because that's the same thing.

Moreover, a book on what NOT to do?

How about spending time and wisdom on WHAT to do? Not that I would buy it, but most people seek advice, not criticisms on what NOT to do.

They're just out to make a buck.

 

[5string]

I like what one of the other posters said which was something like "why is it ok for 30-40 yr old women who like youngers guys to be called cougars, when older guys who want younger women are called creepy"?

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

^^^^^
For the same reason a woman masturbating is a sexy expression of her comfort with her own sexuality, yet when men 'beat off' it's a sick perversion.

Operative social convention.

 

[Jeffst1980]

I think this one is pretty innocuous, guys. It's a silly tongue-in-cheek book that most people will give as a gag gift.

The genders will ALWAYS poke fun at one another. There doesn't need to be a secret agenda behind everything.

Sometimes I'll do something typical of a stereotypical "dumb male" and a girl will bust on me for it. Do I get defensive and accuse her of propagating a false stereotype? No. I laugh it off. Why? BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MATTER.

It's great to be aware of social conventions; in fact, I recommend that everyone learns as much about them as they can. But just being aware of them is all one really needs to succeed. Whining about them or trying to change them is futile and will only result in frustration.

 

[DJ Miquelo]

Wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow....wow does this mean soul patches AREN'T badass????!?!?


.... uh oh

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

yet when men 'beat off' it's a sick perversion.

Even when I shave my pubic hair so that I have a soul patch under my balls and jack it to sufficiently old, fat, ugly, and enlightened women?

 

[Powerlifter]

Modern day hags writing a book.

Now for the parts these women pointed out about undatable men and what they wear. These are men who are basically red necked and have the education level of a first grader and have women who are the same who love what they wear and point the middle finger which is properly dirty at the fashion police.

Now about the video came thing I bet if your the creator of the game making a ton of money from it this hag would shut the fu*k up.

Enough said.

Powerlifter

 

[jophil28]

A true victim mentality at it's heart. It's not my fault I'm unhappy, it's the world's fault for not providing for me exactly what I want without having to put forth much effort.

This stems from not adequately making the transition from a child model of the world, where everything is provided for you, to an adult model of the world, where you have to put in the proper effort to get what you want.

^^ THis describes 85% of women whom I have ever known.

Perhaps this book is a "tongue in cheek" look at men by a couple of witty women, BUT under the top layer of every "joke" is resentment or envy in one form or another..

 

[kingsam]

HAHAHA What the hell does a soul patch have to do with personality, besides making you look gay?

why would you ever have a gay patch...oh i mean soul patch

 

[mrRuckus]

Women have a problem with video games because video games are more interesting than they are and take away from attention they might otherwise get.

Lots of women play video games anyway. My ex has an xbox360 and a wii. I have no consoles at all.