jayneumann
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2005
- Messages
- 29
- Reaction score
- 0
Quick version: I'm in college. Met socially inept girl who is cute, very intelligent, and nervous; how should I proceed?
Longer story:
There's this shy girl who lives in my dorm. She reads a whole lot, is relatively independent, intelligent (in the cute nerdy way, if that's possible), and nervous as hell around me.
So I found out in her online profile that she liked a book that I also liked, and I used that as a chance for an opener at lunch about a week ago.
I took her out to lunch a couple of days later. She was nervous the whole time; having studied the DJB for so long and applying it to reality/normal life, I could detect her body language, speech, etc.
As time moved on, she seemed to warm up a bit, but was still jittery.
I invited her over to my room to hang out and chat for a bit a couple of days after the first date. I liberally applied kino and flirted/teased. She initially pulled back, but got closer and more comfortable (though keeping some distance). We talked for awhile over some tea that I made (coffee is so passe). Here's what I've found out so far (from my biased perspective):
Socially/Personality --
She's shy around people. She has poor social skills. She hangs out with dorks at lunch. She has hobbies, including dance, art, etc., but they are all mostly solidary pursuits. She loves to read a wide range of things. She is interested in pretty hippie stuff, like spiritualized yoga and alternative medicine.
Personal --
I feel that she is honest to a fault. For example, I directly asked her after she said, 'What am I supposed to do?' when I nudged her with my foot, "Have you ever been taken out on a date before?"
Her reply to this was no. She had a "boyfriend" who never took her out (some guy she met when she was working on an organic farm in a rural area). Totally inexperienced. No game.
She also told me about a guy who (I didn't push to ask who it was or if he was still here; should I have?) basically stalked her like nobody's business last year. The creep followed her everywhere, would always be in her room, and would even sleep in her bed uninvited. She cites this as a reason for being cautious around me. I asked her if she thinks I'm dangerous, and she said maybe (so she has some inner game, or as much as a smart AFC girl may).
Anyways, yes, I like this girl enough to want to pursue things further. I am also keeping my cool to a high degree about this; I've got a good feeling and am planning my moves.
I am asking for experienced DJs to help me out here:
- What are your analyses of the situation?
- What possible ways might I proceed?
- Have you guys had situations like this before, finding a relatively untainted diamond in the rough?
Thanks in advance. And if you need more information/details, please announce whatever it is you need and I will see if I can add in anything else.
(Before I get yelled at for posting something that might have been answered before, let me say that "shy" is not a term that can be searched [too short].)
Longer story:
There's this shy girl who lives in my dorm. She reads a whole lot, is relatively independent, intelligent (in the cute nerdy way, if that's possible), and nervous as hell around me.
So I found out in her online profile that she liked a book that I also liked, and I used that as a chance for an opener at lunch about a week ago.
I took her out to lunch a couple of days later. She was nervous the whole time; having studied the DJB for so long and applying it to reality/normal life, I could detect her body language, speech, etc.
As time moved on, she seemed to warm up a bit, but was still jittery.
I invited her over to my room to hang out and chat for a bit a couple of days after the first date. I liberally applied kino and flirted/teased. She initially pulled back, but got closer and more comfortable (though keeping some distance). We talked for awhile over some tea that I made (coffee is so passe). Here's what I've found out so far (from my biased perspective):
Socially/Personality --
She's shy around people. She has poor social skills. She hangs out with dorks at lunch. She has hobbies, including dance, art, etc., but they are all mostly solidary pursuits. She loves to read a wide range of things. She is interested in pretty hippie stuff, like spiritualized yoga and alternative medicine.
Personal --
I feel that she is honest to a fault. For example, I directly asked her after she said, 'What am I supposed to do?' when I nudged her with my foot, "Have you ever been taken out on a date before?"
Her reply to this was no. She had a "boyfriend" who never took her out (some guy she met when she was working on an organic farm in a rural area). Totally inexperienced. No game.
She also told me about a guy who (I didn't push to ask who it was or if he was still here; should I have?) basically stalked her like nobody's business last year. The creep followed her everywhere, would always be in her room, and would even sleep in her bed uninvited. She cites this as a reason for being cautious around me. I asked her if she thinks I'm dangerous, and she said maybe (so she has some inner game, or as much as a smart AFC girl may).
Anyways, yes, I like this girl enough to want to pursue things further. I am also keeping my cool to a high degree about this; I've got a good feeling and am planning my moves.
I am asking for experienced DJs to help me out here:
- What are your analyses of the situation?
- What possible ways might I proceed?
- Have you guys had situations like this before, finding a relatively untainted diamond in the rough?
Thanks in advance. And if you need more information/details, please announce whatever it is you need and I will see if I can add in anything else.
(Before I get yelled at for posting something that might have been answered before, let me say that "shy" is not a term that can be searched [too short].)
