A journal

[Enduro]

This is being posted in the tips section because I figured some of you may be able to learn a thing or two from it.

8/16 - Yesterday

A long and slow 10 hour day at work. Got a few phone numbers - an HB7 and two HB8s.

The 7 asked me to help her find something and while we were looking for the item I asked her if she was from around here. She wasn't, she was from a neighboring state and was here on vacation. Did she like it here? Yes, she goes to the beach every day (and has the tan to prove it) and enjoys herself. We found the item and I asked for her number and I got it.

One of the 8s I approached on my break (she had just started working here). I walked up to her, smiled, and introduced myself. Her name was Erin, I asked her if she liked working here and she said not really. We made some small talk and I asked her what she was doing when she got off work (around 7PM) and asked her if she wanted to go do something. She did, and we ended up going to dinner on the beach. More on that another time.

The other 8 was a textbook approach I made right after I punched out of work. She gave me her phone number.

8/17 - Today

No work today. Went to the beach around 4PM and surfed for awhile. Chatted up a fellow surfer - female - and made plans for this coming Tuesday. We're going to go hiking/rock climbing if the weather is nice, and to the city/mall if the weather sucks. Kind of a slow day though.. only landed one chick.

I'm kind of pressed for time now, next time I will go into more detail.


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[es_mer8]

Thats cool. However with the numbers you got other than Erin's; did you get them from customers? If so, thats very intriguing. My job is basically get printing labels printed off and all that. However I've quit that job and this Christmas and the following summer, I'm going to work as a waiter at a casino. My friend is making at least $15/hour there, tips included. I want to go and do that job and that will help me talk to more than just the usual 10-15 people I see almost all the time when I'm working there.

 

[Enduro]

Yes, they were customers. Why is that intriguing?

 

[es_mer8]

Because its something I've considered doing

 

[JustDoItAlways]

Hey good job.

But absolutely go after the vacation girl as well as Erin. Girls on vacation are such easy scores.

 

[Enduro]

8/19 - Today

Today's lesson, boys and girls, is about breaking through the "friend zone".

There have been quite a few threads on this site regarding boys who have this friend that they really like and want to go out with but can't seem to make her feel the same way.

Pay attention now little ones, because I'm only going to say this once.

The Friend Zone

What is the friend zone? To be able to break through it one must first understand what it is. It's actually quite simple. The friend zone means you get to be her emotional tampon, she thinks of you as her brother, etc., and because of this you'll never score with her in any way shape or form.

What causes a man to be trapped in the friend zone? Often, if the girl is someone they want to be more than friends with, AFC tendencies (read: lack of initiative) create the friend zone. Because you're too afraid or nervous to do anything such as teasing her, touch her, date her, or leave her alone for just a few hours. Your natural response to desire is to smother her with affection and attention.

And that should make her want you, right?

You know the answer to that, I'm sure you've read it on this site a million times: wrong.

In fact, if you want to get out of the friend zone, the last thing you want to do is smother her with anything - especially attention/affection.

There are several keys to getting out of the friend zone, and I am writing this assuming all of you reading this knows the basics of being a DJ - confidence, C&F, etc..

Patience

This is THE key in getting out of the friend zone. What you need to do is to give her a lot of space - and then some. Stop talking to her so much. Stop hanging around her every waking moment. If she has the least bit of interest in you, as a friend or otherwise - she'll start to miss you. It may be tough at first seeing as you're infatuated with this chick but it's absolutely necessary. When you are around her or talk to her (on the phone if you can't be there in person from now on, this is essential - no more AIM or instant messaging for you) - be ****y. Be confident. This breeds desire on her part. She'll notice that you've changed and she'll want to be around you more. End every conversation/meeting you have with her at a high point - keep her interest level WAY up there.

You still want to give her plenty of room like any normal DJ would. You want to keep her interested, and you'll bore her to suicide if you're constantly in contact with her.

Kinesthetics

This is the second most important thing in breaking through the friend zone barrier. You need to touch her. Aside from 'normal' kino, such as touching her shoulder, arm, etc. while you're talking or to emphasize a point, do some kino that ties into a C&F attitude - slapping her ass, maybe snapping her bra or thong (as she's bending over, for example). Do this with a ****y smile on your face. She'll like it.

And she will return the favor. Maybe she'll pinch your ass, 'accidentally' brush her chest up against yours, et cetera. There are a million different things that she could do (and that you could do in return) and I'm not going to bother to list them all here. Be creative, you're not some kind of drone.

Initiative

This is the last key for now.

You haven't gotten this far if you didn't have some initiative, but now it's time to kick it up a few notches. Ask her out. On a date. Make sure she knows it's a date. Go somewhere exciting, do something physical. I like to take some girls kayaking, rafting, rock climbing, etc.. If you're not into that stuff, think of something else (duh!). Take her to dinner. But not just any regular place, go somewhere exotic. Go eat some Thai food and then catch a flick.

Be ORIGINAL and EXCITING! Don't be boring. And you want to go somewhere and do something where there is maximum potential for kino - the goal here is to get her to like you, afterall. Kiss her!
I'm not going to explain how to lead her into that, there are threads on that all over these forums.

I realize this was quite short but I am strapped for time. More lessons and field reports to come at a later date.


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[MrNiceGuy]

where do you work? I'm guessing its a shop of some sort..I'm interested to know.. I'm finishing studying soon, and then I'll need to work for a few months to save to go travelling, I'm trying to work out what sort of job will be best to meet chicks with.

also this "textbook" approach.. what was it? I'm intrigued to know what people do to go around getting 3-4 numbers a day.. did she show interest signs first or did you just barge right on in.. what was your opener? something situational or just a simple hello?

 

[becker]

Gotta work at a trendy clothing store like Abercrombie for the hottest women. I don't think any ugly women shop at that store, and working there gives you the perfect opening to go in and sweep her off her feet.

 

[Enduro]

8/19 - Yesterday

Had the day off work. Took a girl (the surfer mentioned in a previous post) to see Freddy vs Jason. It was a decent movie and it made her jump a lot! I was constantly teasing her about it... I had a good time but she was kind of boring. She told me to call her soon but I don't think I will. I'm not a stickler for the details so if you guys have any questions, just ask.

MrNiceGuy: I work at a grocery store like Gigalo said. The 'textbook approach' was me simply walking up to her and introducing myself. I asked her if she was from around here (she was) and we talked about some local happenings. Easy as pie, gentlemen.

becker: I applied for a job at Abercrombie before applying for a job at my current place of employment. The job was mine but I decided not to take it. It's not as physical as I would like, and while the girls there are hot, they tend to be exactly the same. I like variety.

 

[MrNiceGuy]

thanks for the info..

right one more question.. seeing as cold approaches are probably my weakest area, for the 'textbook' approach, did you stop this girl as she was walking along.. or was she just sat on a bench / looking in a shop window / waiting for a bus... ie. what was she doing??

I feel like stopping someone when they're walking somewhere is kinda rude unless you already know them... anyway keep this journal going if you can, its interesting..

 

[Enduro]

She was looking at bread when I approached her.

 

[Enduro]

8/21 - Today

Very, very uneventful day today. I worked 12 hours so I didn't have the initiative to do much besides work and then hit the gym.

I have two dates tomorrow though... meeting some chick for lunch and then meeting another one for dinner. Never done that before - two dates in the same day! I'll let you guys know how it plays out.

Oh, and they're HB7 and HB 7.5


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