A girl got cheated on, do I have a chance with her?

eaglez1177

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Lmaooo im actually starting to get a kick outta this thread now
 

CaptainJ

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Vitanoid said:
I don't know if they're still sleeping together. I will attempt to attract her and tell you guys about the experience. Doing something is better than doing nothing at all.
Wrong. Doing nothing is better than self sabotage. The more you invest into this girl who is using you as an emotional tampon, the more you regress into AFCdom. You putting all your eggs in someone else's basket.

Forget this girl, she has a BOYFRIEND, you are just her "FRIEND", go and meet other girls.
 

Igetit!

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I'm starting to agree with Eaglez and the others,this is getting down-right ridiculous.

Vitanoid....this forum is here to help you out,but man...you're just making a complete FOOL out of yourself.

You still don't get it. Even after everything that I and the others have said,you're still COMPLETELY IGNORANT of what's going on here.


Listen to what CaptainJ said man. You need to move on. You'll get better and get start to get this straight with the very next girl you decide to pursue IF you listen to this forum,but this one is done for.



In fact,it was over with a LOOONG TIME AGO,waaaay before you even thought about making this thread.




Vitanoid said:
I sent her a message and showed some spark, how should I reply when she tells me she was crying in her room because of depression.
Here,see what we mean?

You're trying to create a sexual "spark" in this girl,while she's still using you as an emotional tampon. All she sees in you is someone to tell her problems and issues to,and this is your fault because of the way you've been interacting with her.


I'll say this again...it's TOO LATE.

It's OVER WITH. You've screwed up man. You've dropped a glass,shattered it into a zillion little tiny pieces,and instead sweeping it up and moving on,you're on your knees trying to gather up all the pieces and glue them back together again.


You can't do that man.



All you're doing is making yourself look foolish,you're not winning this girl over.



Everytime you try to create this "spark",she goes right back to dumping her emotional garbage on you because that's what YOU'VE ALLOWED her to do for however long you've known her.


You don't understand how attraction works for women. We can help you better instead it,I mean it's not that hard,but THIS ONE is over with.



Go ahead and keep making a fool out of yourself for however long you want to,but once you get tired and are ready to start getting some REAL results,we'll still be here.
 

Korrupt

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Vitanoid said:
Right now, I appear to be someone smart, curious, honest, etc. But I criticized her when she acted like a brat. I acted like her compliments about me were obvious.

When she told me, I replied with stuff like "I would never cheat on a lover, what kinda ***** would do anything like that?". We talked about how it was hard to find friends one could trust.

Her trust got broken between her bf and her. She confessed some pretty shocking stuff to me. I mean she confessed the trauma she has been through, that's the most she could ever confess.

Think I can build that bridge of trust between me and her while the one with her bf is still unrepaired?
Are you talking to some random girl online?
 

888

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haha, you guys are just being mean to him now. theres OTHER STUFF you can do with a girl aside from hook up with her. There are TONS of non-sexual perks to keeping close female friends, ya shallow f*ck!

Social proofing, emotional MANpons (yes, it works both ways, you get to unload your emotional garbage on her as well), plus you'll be able to better understand women and understand WHY the DJ ideology works.

Finally, another great use of them is CUDDLE BUDDIES!!! I actually find this to be the best thing ever, the fact that you're allowed to cuddle and hug and hold hands with and eskimo kiss and whatnot with AS MANY GIRLS AS YOU WANT, EVEN ONES WITH BOYFRIENDS!!!

I also might not have been hugged enough as a child :'(
 

f283000

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I only needed to read just a few lines of the OP's post to see where this is going.

I CAN SEE INTO THE FUTURE!!

He made himself into hb's girlfriend/emotional tampon. He might try to pursue her further and then he will be shot down with the classic excuses in cases like this (cant date right now, not over her ex, still loves her ex).

She might even tell you stuff like she "thinks about you," "she loves you" etc just to f*** with your mind to keep you as her emotional tampon and ego boost.

Sorry brother but this sort of situation is a dime a dozen and 99% of the time it always plays out the same. You allowed yourself to be her emotional tampon while she is probably obsessing over her ex. This is what you allowed yourself to become and this unfortunately is the only way she will see you.

Then of course some a**hole just like her ex will come along and she will fly into his arms and you will be left playing video games in your room thinking "how did i go wrong i was there for her when she needed it!" (which was your mistake).


See I told you I could see into the future. Well not really i've just seen this situation before.

I hope you take the advice of others and never allow yourself to become an emotional tampon to a woman again. The moment a woman wants to talk to you about her man problems you need to RUN! It's a trap you can't escape from if you fall.
 

CaptainJ

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888 said:
haha, you guys are just being mean to him now. theres OTHER STUFF you can do with a girl aside from hook up with her. There are TONS of non-sexual perks to keeping close female friends, ya shallow f*ck!

Social proofing, emotional MANpons (yes, it works both ways, you get to unload your emotional garbage on her as well), plus you'll be able to better understand women and understand WHY the DJ ideology works.

Finally, another great use of them is CUDDLE BUDDIES!!! I actually find this to be the best thing ever, the fact that you're allowed to cuddle and hug and hold hands with and eskimo kiss and whatnot with AS MANY GIRLS AS YOU WANT, EVEN ONES WITH BOYFRIENDS!!!

I also might not have been hugged enough as a child :'(
Yes female friends are good, but this guy doesn't want to be her friend, he wants to fvck her. He's going the wrong way about it.
 

Vitanoid

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I talked to her on Friday over the internet. I have never really talked to her before.

Now, in class, she is acting rather strange. She stubs her toe and hollers out (very loud) of frustration then smacks the chair. The whole class went silent, which was funny.

So she goes up to me, says hi to me, and tells me to smile, chewing her gum with her mouth as open as she can. I'm like, "I only smile when I feel like it." when I should of said "What's with people asking me to smile? Soon, people are gonna beg me to smile!". I need to learn how to make stuff up while staring at someone's face.

We were gonna watch a video, and the teacher turned the lights off, but she persisted and he turned them back on.

These sound like cries of attention. She never did stuff like this. I did threaten her with "I'll just find another girl to talk to, maybe she will be more >something< and >something<" last night.

I guess I better show some spark to her tomorrow. Or today, if we talk online. I don't know if she has figured out that I am trying to pick her up by now. She's really stupid, I'll tell ya that, lol.
 

888

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vitanoooooooooidddd

you better be gaming other chicks and posting about this one girl just to get some advice on specifics. otherwise, as other people have said, you are getting / have gotten oneitis. No one else can tell you that you for certain DO have it, you yourself need to analyze your feelings towards her and decide if they are affecting your actions negatively.

secondly, When she comes up in your face doing something that you don't like, such as chewing her gum obnoxiously, call her on it and neg her ("ewww GROSS. Go smack your gum somewhere else please. :)" ) Then when she is trying to regain her composure after your neg, you can take your time coming up with witty followups, and suddenly, BAM! you're in a playful, flirtatious conversation. The reason you feel tension when someone talks to you face to face is because you feel like you're being put on the spot, like they are observing and judging you. Take the attention away from yourself, shift it onto her, and put HER on the spot.

as for your "threats." They should be more like jokes. The impression they should give is "I know he was just joking...but... *GASP* what if he actually DOES go talk to other girls??" Have you ever made a joke at a girl's expense, and she got angry, as though you meant it seriously? Thats what you need to do.

I'm also getting the impression that you don't talk to her face to face very much, since you're noticing all the silly little things she does (noticing little things and attributing them to yourself is also a symptom of oneitis, btw) so...talk to her more in person, get to know her as a person (trite, yes, i know). Now, I'm not saying go chase her down and force her into talking to you. Well, yes, actually, do that, but make it as indirect as possible. When she thinks "why is he talking to me?", the answer should be "well, he needed to [blah blah blah, whatever your official reason is] and somehow we got to talking and OMG he's kind of cute!" rather than "ermmm...because he's a creeper and he's waaaay too into me, and I should make him go away (or maybe I'll just string him along)"


lastly, dude, you need to be more open and honest with yourself. It seems like you're just seeing what you want to, in the way that you want to. We are all here to help you, and part of that involves critiquing your method. Don't let your pride to affect the way you see things. Remove your emotions from the equation; realize that NONE of this is a reflection on you as a person. Otherwise, you're basically driving on a highway with a dirty windshield. I'd rather think "oh SH*T! i'm about to hit that car!" (but be able to do something about it) than to not even realize that I'm headed for a collision.

EDIT: you do seem to be very committed to this though, which is more than I can say for most of the new guys who come on here. Keep at it!
 
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