A girl from the past popping up

[Dam44]

I used to be really close with this girl (made a lot of mistakes as I had no game then. You can find the thread about her in my profile. I told her that I liked her and she rejected me saying she was in a 'relationship'). It's been over a year since I stopped talking and texting her. We only talk when we run into each other during lectures(rarely)

However we started talking recently when I sent a message to our class WhatsApp group and she replied it privately. Asks how I am and how the holiday has been. A bit of small talk here and there and starts telling me about how she's been spending hers, her new business she's starting.

It seemed like she wanted something. Over the past 2 weeks, we've been having a bit of light conversation. We ended up talking about how we've not been talking to each other and she says she wants us to talk more often. This was days ago and I haven't contacted her since then.



She seems to have some kind of interest rekindled but I really don't want to be back in the friendzone. I feel if she wants something between us, she has to put in more effort

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Tell her let's catch up in person sometime and gauge her reaction. If it's enthusiastic then perhaps she may have some interest.

 

[Dam44]

Tell her let's catch up in person sometime and gauge her reaction. If it's enthusiastic then perhaps she may have some interest.

I'll do that. On holiday currently, school reopens in a few weeks. What should I do before then. Just ignore her till then.
Any gain in asking her about her 'relationship'?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I'll do that. On holiday currently, school reopens in a few weeks. What should I do before then. Just ignore her till then.
Any gain in asking her about her 'relationship'?

Why would you ignore her?

No, chat with her and then when time gets closer set up a time and place to catch up once you are back within a few days.

No, it doesn't matter what her status is.

 

[The Duke]

I'll do that. On holiday currently, school reopens in a few weeks. What should I do before then. Just ignore her till then.
Any gain in asking her about her 'relationship'?

No and no. Simply say"hey, talking in person is way more fun. Lets meet up for a date Friday nite??" If she she hesitates then stop talking to her. Find another one. Actions speak louder than words. You putting her in a position to act brings clarity to the situation and addresses your concerns.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Every reason to ignore her over holiday

I don't subscribe to that nonsense

 

[RickPound]

Somewhere in between ignoring her and chatting until you go back to classes. Once you’re back, arrange to meet up and hopefully you’ve done just the right amount of peaking her interest and not being too available to chat, that you can escalate in person and see where it goes.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Did they even have text messaging when you were in college? Lol

Hahaha, we still had dial up internet when I was in college

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Movie night. Insert location. Tell her to dress sexy. Beat it rotten or disregard her. #nextset

 

[Grounded eagle]

I used to be really close with this girl (made a lot of mistakes as I had no game then. You can find the thread about her in my profile. I told her that I liked her and she rejected me saying she was in a 'relationship'). It's been over a year since I stopped talking and texting her. We only talk when we run into each other during lectures(rarely)

However we started talking recently when I sent a message to our class WhatsApp group and she replied it privately. Asks how I am and how the holiday has been. A bit of small talk here and there and starts telling me about how she's been spending hers, her new business she's starting.

It seemed like she wanted something. Over the past 2 weeks, we've been having a bit of light conversation. We ended up talking about how we've not been talking to each other and she says she wants us to talk more often. This was days ago and I haven't contacted her since then.

View attachment 8690

She seems to have some kind of interest rekindled but I really don't want to be back in the friendzone. I feel if she wants something between us, she has to put in more effort

If I were you I’d avoid this girl like the plague. I can assure you that the issues,whatever they may have been,that led to your parting ways with her are still a factor.Especially considering it’s just been a little bit over a year.

Suddenly you’re worth her time because she’s no longer in a “relationship?” You should only be willing to make an exception if she moves heaven and earth to make things happen.

This actually reminds me of my experience with the most vapid and selfish girl I’ve ever been involved with.This was back in my blue pilled days.She wasted a lot of my time and had a really childish view of how relationships worked.Then one day things came to a head and she confessed that there was some guy she was “trying to make things work with.”The inference was that I was supposed to be okay with that. Even back then, I had the wherewithal to cut her the fvck off.

Months later she tried reaching out,apologizing not because of what she did but because she “wanted peace of mind.”Cut her off again.

2 weeks ago I saw her for the first time in 4 years at a party,and she tried to get my attention and come on to me.Guess what?She was just as vapid and selfish.Girls like that never change,especially not over a time frame as short as just over a year.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

It seemed like she wanted something.

They always do..
She didn't want you back then when she was in her 304 phase, now reached her epiphany phase she is suddenly looking for nice guys like you!

Don't be the fool and buy into it.

 

[Dam44]

They always do..
She didn't want you back then when she was in her 304 phase, now reached her epiphany phase she is suddenly looking for nice guys like you!

Don't be the fool and buy into it.

I can actually say she's not a 'bad' girl. And I think she's still very far from epiphany (we're 21/20).

My worry is she might be doing it for the attention

 

[Dam44]

Why would you ignore her?

No, chat with her and then when time gets closer set up a time and place to catch up once you are back within a few days.

No, it doesn't matter what her status is.

Yeah, this seems good.

I'll be sure to give an update later

 

[Dam44]

No and no. Simply say"hey, talking in person is way more fun. Lets meet up for a date Friday nite??" If she she hesitates then stop talking to her. Find another one. Actions speak louder than words. You putting her in a position to act brings clarity to the situation and addresses your concerns.

We can't see right now as we're in different parts of the country. School's on break

 

[Dam44]

Somewhere in between ignoring her and chatting until you go back to classes. Once you’re back, arrange to meet up and hopefully you’ve done just the right amount of peaking her interest and not being too available to chat, that you can escalate in person and see where it goes.

Yeah, thank you. Let's see what happens

 

[AureliusMaximus]

I can actually say she's not a 'bad' girl.

There are no good girls. Its man's phantasy and they do not exist.

And I think she's still very far from epiphany (we're 21/20).

Maybe not; some girls have done everything already in a really early age. I know one myself and she is also 21 and already wants the full package, (E.g. husband, kids, house, dog and a Volvo). She even told me that she quote: "I've already done it all and including the crazy stuff and now I want to settle down with a good guy. I really want kids...".

 

[Dam44]

There are no good girls. Its man's phantasy and they do not exist.

I said she's not a bad girl not that she's good. There are girls who aren't bad girls

There are no good girls. Its man's phantasy and they do not exist.


Maybe not; some girls have done everything already in a really early age. I know one myself and she is also 21 and already wants the full package, (E.g. husband, kids, house, dog and a Volvo). She even told me that she quote: "I've already done it all and including the crazy stuff and now I want to settle down with a good guy. I really want kids...".

This is funny, I feel 21 is still very young

 

[2Rocky]

So this is a boomerang girl. She's attracted enough to reach out. I'll give her credit for sticking with her relationship, but it sounds like things have changed. Line her up for a date when school resumes and have your logistics set for an overnight stay. Make a solid date. Invite her to come by and "see your new place". Treat is like a Date 2 after an info date. Show sexual intent. Have a drink "to celebrate". Go for the kiss before the end of the first drink...

I think you are looking at a Hookup at the least or determining if she is a time waster. Consider her a part of this fall's rotation, and also reach out to other women so when you see them back at Uni it is a Warm approach, not a cold one. Ideally you will have 3 girls in rotation from 3 different social circles.

 

[manfrombelow]

Like the above brothers have correctly advised: Stop the meaningless chit-chat, and ask her out. Everything that really matters starts from that real first date, not on phone screens.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

There are no good girls. Its man's phantasy and they do not exist.

Exactly this...all girls have a naughty and dirty wild side with the right person. The question then becomes are you a man who can bring it out of them or are you the guy bringing out the sweet innocent side?

The same sweet innocent girl that won't kiss on the first date and makes you wait five or six dates for sex is the same girl getting fvcked in the ass and doing ass to mouth with a dude she met an hour ago at the club.

You see the side of the woman you bring out in her and nothing more.