A contradiction of self improvement?

[I_Only_Live_Once]

All over this website it promotes the idea of self-improvement. Yet another idea on this website is that you shouldn't be too ideal and perfect. Supposedly, women like guys who have problems because they want to be the ones who "help" you become a better guy. So how do you present yourself to a woman? The ideas seem like polar opposites to me.

 

[\O/]

Originally posted by I_Only_Live_Once
Supposedly, women like guys who have problems because they want to be the ones who "help" you become a better guy.

Where did you get that from? Women like "jerks" because they think they can change them...but they don't want guys with problems/issues..

 

[JonJack]

Originally posted by I_Only_Live_Once
So how do you present yourself to a woman?

You don't. You present yourself the way you want to present yourself depending on your objectives and how comfortable you are with it.

 

[DonJuanMonk]

Re: Re: A contradiction of self improvement?

Originally posted by JonJack
You don't. You present yourself the way you want to present yourself depending on your objectives and how comfortable you are with it.

DING DING DING. You win the reward.

 

[I_Only_Live_Once]

Re: Re: A contradiction of self improvement?

Originally posted by \O/
Where did you get that from?

For example, in Pook's article "Perfect is boring".

Originally posted by jonjack
You don't. You present yourself the way you want to present yourself depending on your objectives and how comfortable you are with it.

The objective would be to build attraction with her.

 

[tmpgstx]

Much of the time, they have issues within and about themselves that keeps them selecting the proverbial bad-boy. You can read about it here:

http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=5142&TrackingID=516311&BannerID=544657&menuid=6

You can be a good guy, just be a man with some backbone who is easy going yet successful in all his ventures.

 

[JonJack]

Re: Re: Re: A contradiction of self improvement?

Originally posted by I_Only_Live_Once
The objective would be to build attraction with her.

And when will that end? Are you talking about getting the girl to totally go oneitis on you or you're talking about getting her to just like you?

There is no end to what a person can think up in their mind to increase a girl's interest level. And it will become a never ending process if you're gonna look at the whole thing from a 'how do I get her to become more interested in me' perspective.

From what I gather from your initial post, it seems that you want to find something to change so that girls are attracted to you. It's all fine and good, but you're not understanding what self-improvement is and what weakness is. It's so true that they are polar opposites, but only if you view them in black and white.

Self-improvement is always important. Weakness depends on the individual. Some have phobias, which are pretty much uncontrolable. Some have personal issues or quirks. You can see all this when you interact and get to know many different people.

But you don't really have to think about having to show weakness to create attraction. That's pretty lame. Weaknesses are your own personal traits. You're supposed to know they exist and you're supposed to have come to accept them. If you want to, you can overcome them. If you are comfortable with it, then it's just another thing that describes you as an individual.

Seriously though, there's no thought required. Sometimes human beings just think too much about pointless and meaningless shyt. Just don't let it control you too much.