A common trait I saw in men that succeeded with cold approach vs most that failed.

[member160292]

Dude I'm stealing this as a white guy

I’m not posting your bail

 

[Ricky]

Ever since getting into game years ago, I started to wing with a number of guys whether it is going out to nightgame with them or a year ago when I started to take daygame seriously. In that time, I knew a small number of guys who finally made it and ascended versus other guys that are still stuck. I have known some guys that have gamed for years and are still struggling with women. I won't focus much on the Black Pill topics like looks, status, and money even though those matter. What I am going to do is focus on just one trait, completely within a guy's control, that I noticed.

The guys who succeeded after learning "game" fell in love with "game" as a skill.

It is so hard to describe but these guys were more in love with "game" than they were with women. I had one wingman who found "dates" to be somewhat of a drag on some days because it stopped him from going out and talking to more new girls. This guy had 3 dates on one day and slept with two of them (he provided the receipts). For these men, it became less about a particular woman or even women but more about what cold approach stood for. It meant that they could, at any time, just walk up to a random woman and approach her if they were in a big enough city. One guy said that the idea of something like that made him feel "free", like he no longer had to rely on friends, apps, or anything to meet girls.

Guys I talked to who adopted this mindset seemed to almost always succeed with cold approach even if they were not the hottest or wealthiest guy around. If they had a bad day and night, they did not care because they were learning what went wrong and what they could have done differently. Every loss was a learning opportunity and a chance to grow. The more I adopted this mindset, the more I started to succeed.

It became about having fun. Let's go out and try this tactic versus that. Let's go out and talk about a great interaction we had versus a crappy one. Let's go out and get more interactions in and see how women react. To these guys, "game" actually became a freaking game they had fun with.

What about most of the guys that failed?

For the guys that failed, which is most, I'd say 80%, I noticed a different mentality. For them, it was more about the girl than learning the game. Overtime, these guys cracked from rejection. A lot of these guys would lose it and some would get upset when they were having a bad day or night with game. One that comes to mind the most are two of my wingmen.

"How are these girls meeting their men?"

I had two wingmen who, after getting rejected, would ask girls how they are meeting their boyfriends. Girls told them church, work, or through friends. All these guys would talk about to me when we were out running game is what these girls told them about how they met their BF. They both seemed miserable doing cold approach because they were not getting that ideal girlfriend. One wing of mines would not shut up and kept going and going for an hour, I am not kidding here, about how girls are meeting their boyfriends and it is never through cold approach.

It is like these men became so affected by the fact that women out there are dating guys and meeting them through other avenues. They wanted me to share in on their misery because these guys saw cold approach as a chore and if they had a bad outing, it would affect them emotionally. I cut ties with both wings even though they were decent wings.

They wished that they had a girlfriend they met through friends and found cold approach to be something they had to do, not something they genuinely enjoyed. Long-term, both transitioned out of game altogether. Both now rely on dating apps to get dates but I just remember how toxic it was hanging out with them always whining about how girls are meeting guys and they aren't that guy the girls are meeting.

i agree. Once you love the game it will never feel like work again. I love the game

 

[Millard Fillmore]

Ever since getting into game years ago, I started to wing with a number of guys whether it is going out to nightgame with them or a year ago when I started to take daygame seriously. In that time, I knew a small number of guys who finally made it and ascended versus other guys that are still stuck. I have known some guys that have gamed for years and are still struggling with women. I won't focus much on the Black Pill topics like looks, status, and money even though those matter. What I am going to do is focus on just one trait, completely within a guy's control, that I noticed.

The guys who succeeded after learning "game" fell in love with "game" as a skill.

It is so hard to describe but these guys were more in love with "game" than they were with women. I had one wingman who found "dates" to be somewhat of a drag on some days because it stopped him from going out and talking to more new girls. This guy had 3 dates on one day and slept with two of them (he provided the receipts). For these men, it became less about a particular woman or even women but more about what cold approach stood for. It meant that they could, at any time, just walk up to a random woman and approach her if they were in a big enough city. One guy said that the idea of something like that made him feel "free", like he no longer had to rely on friends, apps, or anything to meet girls.

Guys I talked to who adopted this mindset seemed to almost always succeed with cold approach even if they were not the hottest or wealthiest guy around. If they had a bad day and night, they did not care because they were learning what went wrong and what they could have done differently. Every loss was a learning opportunity and a chance to grow. The more I adopted this mindset, the more I started to succeed.

It became about having fun. Let's go out and try this tactic versus that. Let's go out and talk about a great interaction we had versus a crappy one. Let's go out and get more interactions in and see how women react. To these guys, "game" actually became a freaking game they had fun with.

What about most of the guys that failed?

For the guys that failed, which is most, I'd say 80%, I noticed a different mentality. For them, it was more about the girl than learning the game. Overtime, these guys cracked from rejection. A lot of these guys would lose it and some would get upset when they were having a bad day or night with game. One that comes to mind the most are two of my wingmen.

"How are these girls meeting their men?"

I had two wingmen who, after getting rejected, would ask girls how they are meeting their boyfriends. Girls told them church, work, or through friends. All these guys would talk about to me when we were out running game is what these girls told them about how they met their BF. They both seemed miserable doing cold approach because they were not getting that ideal girlfriend. One wing of mines would not shut up and kept going and going for an hour, I am not kidding here, about how girls are meeting their boyfriends and it is never through cold approach.

It is like these men became so affected by the fact that women out there are dating guys and meeting them through other avenues. They wanted me to share in on their misery because these guys saw cold approach as a chore and if they had a bad outing, it would affect them emotionally. I cut ties with both wings even though they were decent wings.

They wished that they had a girlfriend they met through friends and found cold approach to be something they had to do, not something they genuinely enjoyed. Long-term, both transitioned out of game altogether. Both now rely on dating apps to get dates but I just remember how toxic it was hanging out with them always whining about how girls are meeting guys and they aren't that guy the girls are meeting.

Yes but I have seen guys who "fell in love with game" become ego invested in everyone knowing about it. It became part of their identity to the point that having a rep was bigger than just enjoying the female company. Actually I have gone through that phase as well but luckily took a step back and became quieter about it.