60 years old and separated....Now what?

[Craigster]

Hi guys! Recently, my wife asked me for a divorce so now I find myself separated. I'm 60 years old, but still in great health and have a great libido. I've been told I don't look my age and honestly, I don't feel my age. I'm semi-retired and am financially secure with an IRA, I work part-time, and am building a side hustle. I'm not particularly fond of women my age (I'm sure you understand). I have no ambitions of marrying ever again. So what's a guy to do? Any suggestions?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Hi guys! Recently, my wife asked me for a divorce so now I find myself separated. I'm 60 years old, but still in great health and have a great libido. I've been told I don't look my age and honestly, I don't feel my age. I'm semi-retired and am financially secure with an IRA, I work part-time, and am building a side hustle. I'm not particularly fond of women my age (I'm sure you understand). I have no ambitions of marrying ever again. So what's a guy to do? Any suggestions?

What was the reason given for the divorce? Were things heading downhill for a while or did she catch you off guard?

Do you live in a decently large populated area? That will obviously effect the amount of options you have

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Hi guys! Recently, my wife asked me for a divorce so now I find myself separated. I'm 60 years old, but still in great health and have a great libido. I've been told I don't look my age and honestly, I don't feel my age. I'm semi-retired and am financially secure with an IRA, I work part-time, and am building a side hustle. I'm not particularly fond of women my age (I'm sure you understand). I have no ambitions of marrying ever again. So what's a guy to do? Any suggestions?

Are you willing to bang the hotwives your age? They're still old but generally decent for their age and from what I can tell there's little attitude.

 

[member160292]

OP’s post has feminine vibes all over, I can’t be the only one reading between the lines. Right?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

OP’s post has feminine vibes all over, I can’t be the only one reading between the lines. Right?

Don't slow the roll

 

[ManFromTartarus]

OP I understand your situation more than most here as I am in almost the same place in life. Although I have a few more challenges to overcome than you, all I can say is rebuild yourself mentally, emotionally, and socially. If you're coming out of a long relationship, life and the social/dating world is a different place now.

"what's a guy to do?" Is a broad question, but if it's about not being fond of the women our age, you need to look at that objectively, and what you have to offer (your value). It's a tough thing to wrap your head around at times, and I suffer from it too.

If it's just about getting younger women, workout, looksmaxx yourself, and most of all build up some $$$ cause that's probably going to make the most difference.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

OP I understand your situation more than most here as I am in almost the same place in life. Although I have a few more challenges to overcome than you, all I can say is rebuild yourself mentally, emotionally, and socially. If you're coming out of a long relationship, life and the social/dating world is a different place now.

"what's a guy to do?" Is a broad question, but if it's about not being fond of the women our age, you need to look at that objectively, and what you have to offer (your value). It's a tough thing to wrap your head around at times, and I suffer from it too.

If it's just about getting younger women, workout, looksmaxx yourself, and most of all build up some $$$ cause that's probably going to make the most difference.

OP also needs to be realistic. If he thinks he is pulling some 25 year old, he is going to badly disappointed. Very few women that age will go for the wrinkly balls and Viagra shtick.

Younger women will likely be late 40s or early 50s.

 

[SW15]

OP also needs to be realistic. If he thinks he is pulling some 25 year old, he is going to badly disappointed. Very few women that age will go for the wrinkly balls and Viagra shtick.

Younger women will likely be late 40s or early 50s.

After age 50, most men need to go into some sort of "directly paid" relationship to get an under 30 woman.

For a 60 year old, getting a 50 year old woman is a decent achievement and can be done without directly paying her. Even that takes some amount of Game.

 

[Barrister]

If you look good for your age and have money you should have no issue pulling women 10-15 years younger.

 

[SW15]

If you look good for your age and have money you should have no issue pulling women 10-15 years younger.

I'm not particularly fond of women my age (I'm sure you understand). I have no ambitions of marrying ever again. So what's a guy to do? Any suggestions?

The 45-50 year old women he might be able to get won't be that good of a deal. Most 45-50 year old available women have kids somewhere between 14-25. What 60 year old man wants to deal with a random teenager or young adult add on to his girlfriend? Plenty of 55+ men are dealing with their girlfriends/their wives' teenaged or adult children. That sucks.

At least by not marrying again, this 60 year old would be able to limit the interactions with a woman's teenaged or adult children in the years to come.

Adult children also do not like when their 50+ parents get into more serious relationships, particularly marriages. Adult children generally have next to no interest in spending any time with their aging parent's new love interest.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

OP: what do you want? Do you want to try to play the field? Get remarried? Get into a monogamous LTR?

As a man in his 50’s I can tell you that the number one way that you can differentiate yourself from your peer group is fitness, I don’t mean just being a normal weight I mean, actually carrying muscle. Get in the gym if you don’t or haven’t and learn how to lift weights.

 

[kavi]

You have a lot of good potential to socialise and get close to ppl. Because you work-part time, have financial security it means you can have the time and energy to build the social and love life you want. You should know how attractive you are and what kind of women will like you for looks and personality. You can probably be valued by women 40+ in the West but it depends on how you present yourself.

An older guy will be treated differently by women and men in social groups than a younger man, ppl will naturally trust you more and feel comfortable with you in their social group due to extra life experience and maturity. So I think the best thing is to find social groups that you can be a part of and meet women that way. You can use things like meetup etc to find local groups and communities where you may find lots of divorced single older women looking for personal connection.

 

[Stuffnu]

Welcome to freedom! You’ll be fine OP.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Depends on how attractive, youthful looking and well off OP is. And not compared to just other middle aged guys but guys in general.

 

[ManFromTartarus]

I don’t mean just being a normal weight I mean, actually carrying muscle. Get in the gym if you don’t or haven’t and learn how to lift weights.

After 50 it's next to impossible to *build* a lot of muscle, unless OP is going to go roids and spend all his time in the gym, the best guys our age can do is maintain what we have.

Better off getting his head right, just keeping his body together, and building cash for lean times ahead.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Not true. If your T levels aren’t youthful get on TRT.

After 50 it's next to impossible to *build* a lot of muscle, unless OP is going to go roids and spend all his time in the gym, the best guys our age can do is maintain what we have.

Better off getting his head right, just keeping his body together, and building cash for lean times ahead.

 

[jafman]

OP: what do you want? Do you want to try to play the field? Get remarried? Get into a monogamous LTR?

As a man in his 50’s I can tell you that the number one way that you can differentiate yourself from your peer group is fitness, I don’t mean just being a normal weight I mean, actually carrying muscle. Get in the gym if you don’t or haven’t and learn how to lift weights.

This is the best advice by a long way. The protector desire is deep rooted in the female psyche and the shoulder to waist ratio is everything.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Firstly welcome to the boards. The questions posed to you by @BackInTheGame78 are significant as they will impact your dating landscape immensely. Being 60 and newly single is a much different thing in Los Angeles, CA than Gary, Indiana for example (assuming you are in the US.) Very different in London versus the English countryside if you get my drift.

What went sideways in your marriage? This is important because it will affect your mindset going into the singles scene. If you were in a dead bedroom with a woman who let herself go physically and you were having to beg for sex, that is a very different thing than her cheating or you cheating or being with someone who was fit but difficult/demanding etc. Where you have been is going to materially affect your mindset going forward.

The assumption I make based on your initial post is that this has been a difficult relationship and that you therefore do not wish to make a similar investment in someone new. Bear in mind that the dating scene you are entering is extremely different than if you were young and inexperienced in life.

How long were you married and what happened?

 

[ManFromTartarus]

Not true. If your T levels aren’t youthful get on TRT.

I already am, and I'm diligent on workouts, but it's science and nature that proves gaining a lot of muscle at 60 is extremely difficult. All the T boosters and protein powder in the world isn't going to change that.

 

[bmp2cpm]

As someone in his early 50s, I can say that ALL the women my age that used to be beautiful/hot now look like grandmothers.

It is really sad to see. A stark reminder of how short life is. Thankfully, I married a woman that is a little younger.

In my opinion, very few women in their early 50s are worth getting involved with, like 1 in 10,000.

Some exceptional women in their early 40s are worth getting involved with like 1 in 5000,

But the odds of a 60-year getting a 40-year woman are only going good if you are Buzz Aldrin. But if you are not Buzz, good luck.