4th date at the weekend still no kiss. wtf.

[bunjy]

Some great advice here DJ's.

Update: So as it turned out SHE flaked on our 4th date. It was all arranged and I get a txt 2 hours before meet up time saying shes having to work late as theres been a major crisis in work etc etc (turns out this is actually true as I have a friend who works at the same place and hes been working late everynight). I txted back 'OK' and that was it. I was kinda relieved because I knew where I stood with her now and was bored of the whole thing.

So I end up going out drinking with my buddy instead. Was a good night out. Heres the weird thing though, she txts me that night saying how shes still in work and is 'really sorry'. Obviously I dont respond. An hour later she txts again saying how she'll 'make it up to me yada yada'. I dont respond. By the time I leave the bar and get home she has txted me 4 times basically apologising and trying to engage me. Id not responded at all.

Fast forward 48 hours and over this period shes message me about 6 times trying to engage and again apologising, no counteroffer though. I have responded twice and the last one I sent her basically was me telling her how I know shes too busy too meet and we should just leave it now.

Why the hell is she still messaging me? This is her opportunity to close this now, Ive made it obvious my interest has waned significantly so why bother txting me? Im bored of chatting to her and short of her calling me up with a concrete date and basically telling me she wants it Im not interested in the slightest. I know some women try and nicely let you know they are not interested but she should just stop messaging me if shes not interested.

 

[pyros]

Some great advice here DJ's.

Update: So as it turned out SHE flaked on our 4th date. It was all arranged and I get a txt 2 hours before meet up time saying shes having to work late as theres been a major crisis in work etc etc (turns out this is actually true as I have a friend who works at the same place and hes been working late everynight). I txted back 'OK' and that was it. I was kinda relieved because I knew where I stood with her now and was bored of the whole thing.

So I end up going out drinking with my buddy instead. Was a good night out. Heres the weird thing though, she txts me that night saying how shes still in work and is 'really sorry'. Obviously I dont respond. An hour later she txts again saying how she'll 'make it up to me yada yada'. I dont respond. By the time I leave the bar and get home she has txted me 4 times basically apologising and trying to engage me. Id not responded at all.

Fast forward 48 hours and over this period shes message me about 6 times trying to engage and again apologising, no counteroffer though. I have responded twice and the last one I sent her basically was me telling her how I know shes too busy too meet and we should just leave it now.

Why the hell is she still messaging me? This is her opportunity to close this now, Ive made it obvious my interest has waned significantly so why bother txting me? Im bored of chatting to her and short of her calling me up with a concrete date and basically telling me she wants it Im not interested in the slightest. I know some women try and nicely let you know they are not interested but she should just stop messaging me if shes not interested.

sorry to be rude but...you're kind of fuc-ked up in your head.

Obviously she has little interest, ok, but she had a real problem (you could confirm it) at work, and she texted you a dozen of times to apologise etc! so just arrange another date for God's sake!!

Go on a damn date, try to kiss her and see if she likes it, if not, send her to hell.

Jeezzzz...she has little interest, but you had DJ overdose.

 

[marmel75]

Some great advice here DJ's.

Update: So as it turned out SHE flaked on our 4th date. It was all arranged and I get a txt 2 hours before meet up time saying shes having to work late as theres been a major crisis in work etc etc (turns out this is actually true as I have a friend who works at the same place and hes been working late everynight). I txted back 'OK' and that was it. I was kinda relieved because I knew where I stood with her now and was bored of the whole thing.

So I end up going out drinking with my buddy instead. Was a good night out. Heres the weird thing though, she txts me that night saying how shes still in work and is 'really sorry'. Obviously I dont respond. An hour later she txts again saying how she'll 'make it up to me yada yada'. I dont respond. By the time I leave the bar and get home she has txted me 4 times basically apologising and trying to engage me. Id not responded at all.

Fast forward 48 hours and over this period shes message me about 6 times trying to engage and again apologising, no counteroffer though. I have responded twice and the last one I sent her basically was me telling her how I know shes too busy too meet and we should just leave it now.

Why the hell is she still messaging me? This is her opportunity to close this now, Ive made it obvious my interest has waned significantly so why bother txting me? Im bored of chatting to her and short of her calling me up with a concrete date and basically telling me she wants it Im not interested in the slightest. I know some women try and nicely let you know they are not interested but she should just stop messaging me if shes not interested.

I would have probably just texted her "Let me know when you wanted to make it up to me and if I'm still single, maybe we can meet up."

Basically tells her she F'd up and you are pursuing other options. Nothing to really lose, if she gets upset by it, you already had nothing here anyway.

And no girl that is interested in a guy is going to pull away after an attempted kiss on a 3rd date.

 

[zinc4]

She doesn't deserve any replies from you at thus point and isn't worth a date go get new girls abd always go for the kiss abd sex first date abd don't accept no...time to go ghost forever in this one..

 

[bunjy]

I would have probably just texted her "Let me know when you wanted to make it up to me and if I'm still single, maybe we can meet up."

Basically tells her she F'd up and you are pursuing other options. Nothing to really lose, if she gets upset by it, you already had nothing here anyway.

And no girl that is interested in a guy is going to pull away after an attempted kiss on a 3rd date.

Yeah you've pretty much nailed it here. Between her pulling away from kisses and flaking my interest level has nosedived.

 

[bunjy]

She doesn't deserve any replies from you at thus point and isn't worth a date go get new girls abd always go for the kiss abd sex first date abd don't accept no...time to go ghost forever in this one..

Thats where Im at really. I cant be bothered even txting her anymore. She was texting me again yesterday, I replied this time and basically made it obvious Im not interested in talking to her anymore unless we meet up.

She proposed a date next weekend and I agreed.

All signs point to her flaking again. Im not sure I actually want to meet her again as I think Im largely wasting my time and Im much more interested in chasing other women now.

 

[Kailex]

Oh, she will flake on you again, and text you in the meantime, because you can't even realized you were friendzoned a while ago.

All those things you listed as signs of interest level (in one of your first posts in this thread)... aren't really true signs of interest. The non-kissing trumps all of those.

You might want to read what Einstein's definition of insanity is. And soak that in.

 

[zinc4]

You just don't get it...go ghost...that means don't contact her anymore... nothing....zilch..nada...no replies to her either and if she doesn't flake than stand her up and remain ghost....give her no warning no closure... nothing....You have to have limits abd boundaries and you can't be afraid to be a selfish *******....stand her up and laugh to yourself about it and just forget about her....there is no in between..she friend zoned you already there fore she deserves nothing from you including common courtesy.... just regard her as a ****roach from now on that you want nothing to do with...

 

[bunjy]

Oh, she will flake on you again, and text you in the meantime, because you can't even realized you were friendzoned a while ago.

All those things you listed as signs of interest level (in one of your first posts in this thread)... aren't really true signs of interest. The non-kissing trumps all of those.

You might want to read what Einstein's definition of insanity is. And soak that in.

Yep, the non kissing is a strong indicator of no real interest really. Throw in the flaking and its obvious shes just doing it for attention.

 

[bunjy]

Hey guys thought Id give you a little update just to finish this thread off and as a good example of how all the advice on here was great and displayed a good understanding of womens games.

As I posted previously she tried to arrange a date last weekend for this weekend and I agreed. After that I didnt hear from her for 3 days (almost proof she really wasnt interested as if she was she would have maintained contact in an attempt to smooth things over after flaking) and then get a txt midweek basically asking how I am doing etc. I didnt respond, I did however get drunk two nights later and respond (bad move I know but I wasnt really bothered by it all anyway as Ive been gaming another chick who is obviously interested). Anyway she responded fairly quickly and we had a short txt conversation.

Since then Ive heard nothing from the flake, which is great as I was tired of talking to her anyway and had otherwise been putting my energy into gaming this other chick. So it comes to the day she proposed another date (yesterday) and as predicted I hear nothing at all. No txt/call excuse or anything, of course this didnt phase me as Id long given up on her. In short, pretty much everything that has been said in this thread here was 100% correct. She clearly wasnt interested and was just looking for attention. By distancing myself and going cold on her after she flaked initially it forced her hand and her true intentions came out e.g. little to no interest. I can imagine that some guys might have tolerated her bad behaviour and continued to contact and respond positively to her. The cycle would have carried on. I still suspect she will attempt to re-engage with me over the next few days, obviously Im not even going to consider wasting any more time on her.

The best point that can be proven by this thread is the old rule that if you have all your energy focused on one chick your much more likely to tolerate unacceptable behaviour. Because I was gaming this other girl last week it was easy to see the visible differences between the two chicks. One was flaky and frustrated me the other was acting interested, responsive to me texting her and keen to meet me ASAP. Im taking her out tomorrow night.

Always have other options. Case closed.