21 and allready limp. WTF!

[Shag&Brag]

Ok, so last night I got a girl over from Tinder. Everything was cool. We are making out, I have gotten her completely naked and I was fingering her + rubbing her ****. I *think* I got her off (I said think, because all tho she was breathing heavely, moaning and having this redish blush in her face, I really did not notice any cramps) and now I was ready to penetrate her. I put the condom on, and I allready feel my wood fading a bit, so I try to put it in and FCK! It was like I was up against solid wall. I tried a few times untill I went completely limp. So that sucked..

I think I plaid it off well. I just said "It happens some times", and acted like it was no big deal. Masturbated her, cuddled, musturbaded her again, cuddled, gave her cunilingus twice, and in the end let her jack me off. Alltho I tried to please her as much as I could that night, I don't think she will be up for next time. The morning after was pretty akward.

And another interesting thing is when she jacked me off, alltho my penis was risen, it was fairly easaly to bend. I would not make big deal out of this, because I sleep irregular hours, jackoff to porn once in two days for past 3 years, have stress at school/job, do not work out and have a poor diet. I think it all can contribute to me not being able to perform.

But then it hit me. I have bean expierencing similar problems my whole sexual life. I mean, previous times I had written it off to having alchachol prior , smoking weed prior or not being used to condoms. But now I am fraid, that it might be a effect of a more serious cause.

Have anybody got some soart of expierence in this type situation? And WTF? Can I have serious erectyle disfunction as early as 21 years of age? I mean, I have heard roumors, that my father was not that grate of a lover either...

The more I think about all of this, the more I am starting to freak out. Any response would be grately appreciated!

 

[AttackFormation]

1) Stop watching porn. Do not watch any porn, ever
2) Do not masturbate, do not put your hand around your d!ck
These two things will re-sensitize your mind and d!ck over time if you have the patience and self-control for it (and if you don't, you will see the level of addiction it's become to you), I guarantee you. I'm on these two things right now.

3) Does your diet include all the nutrients you need
4) How much good sleep do you get/night
5) Do you drink
6) Do you smoke
7) Are you out of shape
8) If you're having performance anxiety about it, that in itself can cause it
9) In my experience, this (like sex in general) gets better the more sex you have with someone - the first time should really be regarded as a testing ground

Then you also have to keep in mind three more things... condoms really suck (I personally have a policy of not giving a girl sex unless she is on or willing to go on birth control), condoms are a distraction (any distraction, even mental ones, can cause problems with the boner), and you can't keep an erection forever so hammer her while the iron is hot rather than spending half an hour touching her pvssy or whatever before you even enter her.

 

[LiveYourDream]

Relax. Your body was a bit off. It happens. Now educate yourself and modify your behavior as needed to rewire your brain, if that is the culprit. See below...

Know that there is a HUGE population suffering from "porn induced erectile dysfunction." Google it. You can read countless stories. These aren't just older men. There are lots of younger men in their late teens and early 20's, who despite their youth, an HB, and full intent, are no longer able to get hard and have sex (or consistently). Some can no longer even get hard to masturbate or without really extreme porn. (This is not an anti porn post.)

There are articles explaining how the brain changes from watching porn excessively and/or increasingly pushing the limits for the kind of porn you do watch. There articles explaining how it alters the brain and response system and thus can eventually affect your ability to be hard with a woman. It is becoming a pervasive and much more openly discussed issue. There is lots of online support and forums for the journey to regain full function, as well as lots of success stories to read.

You are not alone. Do not worry. Young men just like you have rebooted back to rock hard erections. There is information readily available to understand it and regain full function, should it be the cause of your issue. If it's not, at least understand it, so you can choose to prevent it.

What happened in the morning? Were you able to get hard or did you avoid the issue to avoid possibly feeling embarrassed a second time in a row with her? Curious? Men set the tone with women about it. If you are casual and not upset it's sooooo much easier for a woman to go with the flow and enjoy each other in other ways.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Do what they said about rewiring your brain for real sex and real visuals. Get a nice friend who is patient with you who loves to give you head. Someone you can be 110% comfortable in your skin around. This is part of the problem, anxiety. You need to be able to enjoy without worrying about having to perform.

 

[custardpie]

It's all in your head. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself and just concentrate on arousing yourself. Look at her body, imagine all the positions you'd like to fvck her in and what it would feel like.

Oh and fvck condoms.

 

[Huffman]

1) Can you get hard watching porn, anything, any time at all? Maybe on a beautiful sunday morning, you watch your favourite porn, feel good, feel strong? If so then relax - it's not a medical condition - you can rewire your brain. Which may involve

2) Been there, had sex with a girl that I actually wasn't that attracted to. She started to really annoy me (see other thread: your biggest turn off) and I lost it. I kinda still wanted to so got confused, started doubting myself etc. Had 2 more girls after that which were both super tight and couldn't get it in either. I seriously thought I had ED at that time.

You know how I broke the circle? I called up my old f*ck buddy who was thankfully still available and well..... had problems at first, boy had I gotten insecure. But I just said "oops", she said "hehe", did some more foreplay and off we went. Had a great session and confidence is restored ever since.

 

[Huffman]

By the way you wrote how you "masturbated her" like 5 times - what did she do to YOU? Guys need foreplay too. You're not 14 anymore and walking around rock hard all day. This is as much for YOU as it is for her. Don't try to perform.

If any girl is reading this, a great thing you can do is to keep kissing / doing foreplay as the guy is putting the condom on.... helps ALOT if he does struggle every now in a while.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Viagra used to be $20 a pill. Now the generic stuff from SE Asia is about 75 cents.

Working out will help to raise your testosterone levels. Also, avoid soy in your diet. The first time I ever got limp-d!ck was in law school. I never exercised, and I was living off Boca burgers, which are made of soy.

 

[CuddleJunkie]

I don't know if I can post a link to another forum, but if not, just PM me OP. Penile exercises are awesome, get your erections at 100% level and get you bigger if you are after it. I can say as a matter of fact that it works.