19 year old noob here. I really ****ed up and need help

[Great being a man]

I suppose one of things I always wonder about with stuff like this is, are you really that interested in a girl? Or are you just looking for some tail action?

If you're wanting someone serious, I'd be trying to see just how well you'd match up..........otherwise, if it's just for some fun, why get so hung up over her?

I can't speak for all men, but I knew within 10 minutes of meeting any woman if she was someone I wanted to cohabitate with.

I wish more men here would develop an abundance mindset with women............truly, there are litterally 1000s available

 

[Fratboy]

See how she is seeking attention? Creating an orbiter? She wants you to ask "how was your night?'
Then she will blather on and on, drama, so sick, so drunk, blah blah, blah. Such a wild night, etc.

Before you know it, you have wasted an hour of your life, for fvck all.

YOU don't really give a flying FVCK how hung over she is.

Your goal is a date. Don't be a girlfriend - with- a- ****. Let her text her Gf this drama and crap.

Here is what you do.

Ignore the chit chat text. Ignore the snapchats.

Eventually she will wonder "WTF? Why hasn't he responded" and she will text something of more substance, like "Hey, haven't heard from you, is everything ok?"

You: " Yeah, just crazy busy. When are you free to get together?"

Her:" Let me tell you about last night. Blah, blah Blah,."

You: Silence
Her "It was so crazy!"

You: Silence

Her: "Is your phone working?"

You: "Yeah, sorry. Crazy busy. When are you free to get together?"

Her : "I don't know...........I am going out tomorrow, and have a friend's birthday Friday....."

You : "Get ahold of me when you are free"


Then you go absolute radio silence. Don't respond to ANYTHING other than the offer of a date night. No responses that day at all, unless it is to respond to a night she is free.

YOU NEVER INITIATE CONTACT. When she does again, same old same old. You don't chit-chat, or small talk, it is right back to "I'm kinda tied up right now, when are you free to get together"


She will either set a date or get tired of trying to make you an orbiter and seek greener pastures. Either way, you win.

This is gold. Thank you

 

[Terrie_Cotterx94]

Girls = Not stupid.
Most don't care about the relationships, but even party girls aren't all about ****ing. Which means one of two things; 1) she just wants a friend out of you (with all the snapchating && texting), or 2) she knows she has got you under your thumb, and you have no shot, unless she wants to give you that shot.
Your 19 dude, wake up!! It's not all about s** dr*** && rock n' roll :rockon: . If you are really interested in her, tell her. While yes, she may already know, she may just be really ignorant and not know.

Being clingy will not land you a ****, it will land you in the friendzone. I am not sure if you want to be in any kind of realtionship (probably not by the sounds of it), at the same time you already sound like you are at the break-up point.

So my advice to you is move on.

 

[hudpes]

God damnit mauser repped! (would have, unable to)

 

[Fratboy]

Thank you everyone for the advice. I am going to follow Mausser's advice, and will post back here if anything happens. If not, I don't care, and I am going to start reading the bible today after my midterm.

My ascent from ground level has started.

 

[No.Danny]

Stop the texting ****. You'll end up as her texting bff. I can say it from harsh experience

 

[Fratboy]

Update: She texted me last night, didn't respond. Took only 4 days.

 

[Fratboy]

I literally laughed my ass off when she texted me. It was too easy

 

[Fratboy]

I will let you guys know when she texts me next time. I will follow your advice exactly. If there is no mentioning of hanging out and a time and place, just gonna cut it off. My ****s not gonna **** itself. I'm not trying to waste any time anymore

 

[Fratboy]

Update: Pretty much NC for 3 weeks and I've been seeing other girls and have wiped her out. Today she told my roommate at a party that I apparently hate her now

 

[Fratboy]

Women have very fragile egos that need constant validation. (younger women especially) Hence Facebook. Constant loading of selfies for guys and girls to "like" and oohh and ahhh over.

When you don't give them that, you "must hate them".

Don't worry about it, carry on with your life.


You have learned an important lesson in your own value today.



Eventually, she will probably chat you up at a party, etc. Keep things polite, brief, happy.Neutral. Deny hating her, or even having any feelings towards her. This will confuse the living shVt outta her, because right now she NEEDS to know if you are angry and butthurt, or if you hate her, or if you want to be with her. It's the fragile ego thing again. Chat for a minute or two in a polite manner, then find an excuse to excuse yourself, leaving with the words "It was really nice to see you"

Betcha she texts you shortly after. THEN, you avoid the chit--chat trap with the same behavior I recommended before "When are you free to go out"


Remember, you don't have to HATE her or have hard feelings - you are just making it clear you want to date her, not be an attention source (filling her needs and wants whilst ignoring your own)

What do you mean by I learned an important lesson in my value?

 

[johnywhite17]

I didn't read any further than the part when she went home and ****ed a nerd. Why did you have any attraction left after this? Instead of getting laid by any of the other girls at the party, you got butthurt over a girl who gets ****ed by nerds that she just met. That's your main problem.