I have been reading this book lately that has some great stuff in it, including these 13 things. I actually got the title from this website. Anyhow I've noticed there are alot of people making mistakes when they jump into a realtionship, including myself, so I thought I would share these with you all. They are the most common things we do in search of love or a relationship in which we want to be loved. Each of these things will inevitably fail to meet our needs. They will however take us to a hellish experience:
1. All the signs say this is not the one, but you ignore your internal alarms, and move ahead into a love fantasy.
2. Because you fear being alone, or because you cannot have what you want in a relationship, you accept the first person who comes along, only to be left, beaten or ripped off.
3. You confuse friendship and niceness with romantic love.
4. Because someone is nice to you and you are not used to it, you don't know how to say no to them when you realize they are not who you want.
5. You get caught up in the packaging and promises.
6. You force your desires for a relationship onto another person, or issue an ultimatum. Because the person does not know how to say no, he or she goes along with you for a while
7. Because the other person express interest in you, you respond without really exploring if this is who or what you want.
8. You allow blind faith, which leads to blind love, to take you into a relationship that is unhealthy.
9. You choose to believe that what your partner has done to another person, they will not do to you.
10. Sexual compatibility is mistaken for love.
11. You stay in a relationship although you are miserable, trying to work things out even when your partner shows no interest in working through the difficulty.
12. You don't express what you really feel because you believe it will hurt your partner's feelings.
13. You choose to believe your partner's lies even when you know the truth. You act like you do not know what is going on when you do.
I think I'm guilty of a couple of these....
1. All the signs say this is not the one, but you ignore your internal alarms, and move ahead into a love fantasy.
2. Because you fear being alone, or because you cannot have what you want in a relationship, you accept the first person who comes along, only to be left, beaten or ripped off.
3. You confuse friendship and niceness with romantic love.
4. Because someone is nice to you and you are not used to it, you don't know how to say no to them when you realize they are not who you want.
5. You get caught up in the packaging and promises.
6. You force your desires for a relationship onto another person, or issue an ultimatum. Because the person does not know how to say no, he or she goes along with you for a while
7. Because the other person express interest in you, you respond without really exploring if this is who or what you want.
8. You allow blind faith, which leads to blind love, to take you into a relationship that is unhealthy.
9. You choose to believe that what your partner has done to another person, they will not do to you.
10. Sexual compatibility is mistaken for love.
11. You stay in a relationship although you are miserable, trying to work things out even when your partner shows no interest in working through the difficulty.
12. You don't express what you really feel because you believe it will hurt your partner's feelings.
13. You choose to believe your partner's lies even when you know the truth. You act like you do not know what is going on when you do.
I think I'm guilty of a couple of these....
