1000 approaches

[Sam_J]

Just get the phone #.

I try but its easier to get snaps

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Thanks, I definitely need to work more on it for sure tho, still lots of anxiety and embarassment around approaching sometimes.

It's normal. Even professional musicians get nervous before going on stage. It's what makes life exciting. But the anxiety will eventually go down and die off the more you do it.

The key is to remember that every human you see on the streets is just like you. Never put anyone (especially a girl) on a pedestal. They are not above you or below you. Forget their looks, their cars/house/etc, forget their attitude, they are normal human beings and you will always have something in common and something of value.

If it helps, make it a game. See every person as a surprise box, be excited about what is in that box. Because something in that box can add value to you as a human being and as a man. Make it a game to find out what that is.

Modern Man Advice

 

[Josh Davidson]

Approaches 1 & 2: Tonight I went to the bar by my house and approached two women; asking each of them if they were single. Neither one was. I would have asked them for their phone numbers if they were. They were the only two women in this small bar worth approaching. I also saw (and she saw me, but neither of us talked tonight, and I don't expect us to) the woman whose phone number I got on St. Patrick's Day, and when I tried to meet up with her she eventually texted "I'll let you know". (She just ignored me tonight; she was talking to a female friend of her's who looked [just] ok, but I assumed the woman who gave me the "I'll let you know" text would have sabotaged any attempts of mine to get with her friend.)

 

[corrector]

These women you approach. Are they on their smartphones? Do you think that's affecting your closing ratio, especially if they are plugged into dating apps and social media?

 

[SW15]

Just get the phone #.

Social media is bullshiit. Phone numbers are the only acceptable form of communication.

 

[Josh Davidson]

These women you approach. Are they on their smartphones? Do you think that's affecting your closing ratio, especially if they are plugged into dating apps and social media?

The women were not on smartphones. I did 100 approaches once within a year and only got 1 phone number! I would have thought I would have gotten more since about 15 of them were single.

 

[Mister_Skinny_Jeanz]

go for it , ive met 2 new women recently , all just by sparking up conversation.

 

[Mister_Skinny_Jeanz]

Social media is bullshiit. Phone numbers are the only acceptable form of communication.

idk bout that, i get the IG first , asking a random chick for her phone number works out rarely , she has to have an insane IL

 

[SW15]

idk bout that, i get the IG first , asking a random chick for her phone number works out rarely , she has to have an insane IL

I've been asking for phone numbers for over 20 years. No issues at any point in time.

The women were not on smartphones. I did 100 approaches once within a year and only got 1 phone number! I would have thought I would have gotten more since about 15 of them were single.

If you're doing shiity, uncalibrated approaches, that can happen. Also possible if aiming high without demonstrating any value.

 

[Mister_Skinny_Jeanz]

I've been asking for phone numbers for over 20 years. No issues at any point in time.



If you're doing shiity, uncalibrated approaches, that can happen. Also possible if aiming high without demonstrating any value.

it is what is, i get girls ig all the time , and then get the number , meeting one today she is texting me right now

 

[corrector]

The women were not on smartphones. I did 100 approaches once within a year and only got 1 phone number! I would have thought I would have gotten more since about 15 of them were single.

100 approaches in 1 year works out to roughly two approaches a week, unless you did it at one time at a huge gathering/social/party and you only went once in a year? Either way that doesn't sound like a high number of approaches, and I can see that its a low number.

If you approached 6 women per day in a year that would be 2, 190 approaches. If the first two approaches are warm-ups then you are really focusing on 2-3 quality approaches each day which would work out to hopefully 730 quality approaches and 730 daily warm-ups. Assuming you are on a learning curve and adapting then you should start seeing improved numbers.

Now the question, is can you generate a volume of that many women to approach (i.e. 4-6 women per day) using day-game without using too much of your time? Are you going to just be approaching hot women or any women? Are you wearing your best clothing and bringing on your A-game when you are doing these approaches? Watching a motivating youtube video of seeing other guys approach women? Are you going to fit it into your schedule so you have a consistent effort (ie block off 2 hours a day for approaches at XYZ location, etc....)? Would you have a journal so you can go over what you did, and what you could do better next time?

So I think there is allot of things you can do to improve your numbers. If I had the time to do this myself, I think it would be interesting to do something like that. If you have all this time and no tie-downs then you have the potential to have a great year with this.

 

[Josh Davidson]

I usually just approach hot women (8-10/10) but sometimes go for 7's/10.

 

[Plinco]

Success rates are subjective. How you view success is different than the next person.

Had to get this off my chest. It is not subjective, it is objective because it is contextual.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Had to get this off my chest. It is not subjective, it is objective because it is contextual.

I can see why you are saying that and you are actually not wrong. However, what an accomplished man can pull will be different from what a not so accomplished man can pull. The former would consider getting her in bed success, the ladder simply getting the number success. The two subjects are simply on two different levels of accomplishment.

You can't simply deny someone new to the "game" having the courage to talk (IRL) to women of calling that a success. The same goes for so many different concepts, happiness, wealth, or even God. We all experience those things in a very intimate and personal manner. That is why I referred it as subjective.

But again, I 100% get what you are saying in the greater scheme of things.

Modern Man Advice

 

[Josh Davidson]

Approach 3: I went to the bar by my house and approached a woman. I asked her if she was single, and she said: No.

 

[Georgepithyou]

Approach 3: I went to the bar by my house and approached a woman. I asked her if she was single, and she said: No.

That's a terrible opener, why not go for some tried and true daygame openers instead?

 

[Josh Davidson]

That's a terrible opener, why not go for some tried and true daygame openers instead?

What opener would you suggest? And I'm asking this to anyone reading this.

 

[corrector]

Approach 3: I went to the bar by my house and approached a woman. I asked her if she was single, and she said: No.

That's a good opener. Why? Because YOU DID SOMETHING. It doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be done.

You said approach # 3. I don't judge you for having the balls to make an effort.

She said no. Maybe she's not single. Maybe she's not interested in you. The problem is it's just one woman.

Just do more approaches (at least on this thread).

Try this:

1) Are you single --- if one says 'yes'

2) Do you think I'm attractive? ---- if one says 'yes'.

3) Why can't we make-out right now? Then kiss-close her.

It's a numbers game. One approach out the blue says you are probably nervous as heck, had all sorts of low value scarcity sub-communication and no matter what approach you use, you would have been totally socially uncalibrated and it would just fail anyway at the end. If you say a bad opener that's expressed right with confidence then it can be a great opener. Its all on how you deliver not what you say.

 

[Josh Davidson]

That's a good opener. Why? Because YOU DID SOMETHING. It doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be done.

You said approach # 3. I don't judge you for having the balls to make an effort.

She said no. Maybe she's not single. Maybe she's not interested in you. The problem is it's just one woman.

Just do more approaches (at least on this thread).

Try this:

1) Are you single --- if one says 'yes'

2) Do you think I'm attractive? ---- if one says 'yes'.

3) Why can't we make-out right now? Then kiss-close her.

It's a numbers game. One approach out the blue says you are probably nervous as heck, had all sorts of low value scarcity sub-communication and no matter what approach you use, you would have been totally socially uncalibrated and it would just fail anyway at the end. If you say a bad opener that's expressed right with confidence then it can be a great opener. Its all on how you deliver not what you say.

I don't approach women more often than I do because I live in a small town with not very many people; so that means not many good looking women worth approaching.

 

[f283000]

I admire your will for improvement but I can’t help but feel like you are wasting your efforts. It’s 2021 and the sexual market place is way different than years ago when approaching was popular.

right now because of social media even a 4 has a hundred simps on her inbox giving her validation. So whatever acceptable woman you approach you can bet there’s simps in her life giving her validation so you got competition.

women now a days will give you the number just so you can go away they have become privy to approaching.

the biggest dating app in the world right now is IG. It’s what women use and it’s what they respond to which is clout/being attracted to a guy that presents an attractive proposition for dating based on his pictures.

I know I may sound like a hater for cold approaching but I just feel in this day and age of 2021 men should already be past going around walking embarrassing themselves getting rejected by hundreds of women just to get a phone #

are men still this thirsty in 2021? Could all that time you will be spending walking around be better spent going to the gym, taking salsa classes, boxing, public speaking and making yourself a really attractive proposition for women?

And if I can add that approaching doesn’t really improve your social skills that much besides just getting over the fear of talking to women. People say it’s about improving social skills but if you look at most guys that do this most are ackward af.