Is Silence Really Golden?

[soulforge]

Ex girlfriend, I currently walked away from, due to her not appreciating my time and efforts in the relationship.

I ghosted her because she was barely making any effort to text me.. After 7 days of radio silence from me, she ended the relationship.

However.. she has started messaging me on bumble (Clearly she joined bumble again to meet other men)

She is intentionally guilt tripping me, blaming me for the demise of the relationship.

Should I even reply back to her false accusations? Or is ignoring her the better option.

 

[TheProspect]

Should I even reply back to her false accusations?

No.

Ignore, then move on.

If you need an explanation, re-read literally every sentence in your post. Should be self-evident.

 

[soulforge]

No.

Ignore, then move on.

If you need an explanation, re-read literally every sentence in your post. Should be self-evident.

Thanks man.. When it comes to females.. Silence is usually always the right answer.

 

[saige]

Absolutely not. She’s clearly using you for validation or trying to test to see if you’ll come around. She’s doing this so the next time she leaves she knows you’re going to let her come back anyways.

How is she blaming you for the relationship ended when like she’s the one that decided to throw the towel in? A week of radio silence is absolutely ridiculous. I am in a relationship and if I haven’t heard from them in a couple of days I’d be really skeptical unless there was a good reason.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Case by case basis.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Histrionic Personality Disorder. It's more accurately a spectrum than a yes/no. Borderline personality disorder would be the max. I would sum it up as the need to feel the emotions of "isn't it so sad that we can't be together?"

 

[soulforge]

Absolutely not. She’s clearly using you for validation or trying to test to see if you’ll come around. She’s doing this so the next time she leaves she knows you’re going to let her come back anyways.

How is she blaming you for the relationship ended when like she’s the one that decided to throw the towel in? A week of radio silence is absolutely ridiculous. I am in a relationship and if I haven’t heard from them in a couple of days I’d be really skeptical unless there was a good reason.

Well the communication broke down, due to her pulling back with the text messaging.

It felt like a power move on her part.. limited text messages from her, not making much effort. No affection in the messages.

I didn't like it or appreciate it. Wasn't willing to fold either or chase her. So I simply stopped giving her attention and validating her games.

All communication stopped for seven days, then she reappeared gaslighting me, shifting all blame to me, and ending the relationship.

I kept it simple.. I let her know this isn't working for me. My time/effort isn't being valued, so I am also done with this. Good luck.

Since then.. she has sent me a wall of text messages, blame shifting, gaslighting more than likely, as per usual.

I simply ignore the messages. However I can't lie, I am tempted to read them, but I can't see anything good coming out of it.

So I guess I will keep with NC.

 

[sevbucmash]

She ended the relationship. You already did let her know she's a crazy ***** and you want nothing to do with her. There is nothing here. Black list her.

 

[soulforge]

She ended the relationship. You already did let her know she's a crazy ***** and you want nothing to do with her. There is nothing here. Black list her.

Yeh she bailed out of the relationship. After the fact, I simply agreed with the break up & let her know that I wasn't appreciated, therefore I am done with this too.

This is where the manipulation part comes into play.

She sent a wall of guilt tripping messages & dodged all accountability, however she made it look like in her message, that I pulled the chord on the relationship & she respects my decision.

Never get sucked into a back and forth with a female, especially if she is showing signs of manipulation.. It's all NC from here on.

 

[Glassguy]

@soulforge why did you swipe right on her to begin with? Just curious

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver.

I wouldn't ignore her.

I will keep her as a rotation piece.

Keep your feelings OUT of it, but keep her around so that you can tap it on occasions.

 

[soulforge]

Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver.

I wouldn't ignore her.

I will keep her as a rotation piece.

Keep your feelings OUT of it, but keep her around so that you can tap it on occasions.

You know I used to have this mindset.. keeping a girl around as a rotation piece.

However often I found in reality, over a longer period of sleeping with someone, waking up with them, watching a movie together etc.. Feelings tend to develop over time.

I don't think you can indefinitely have sex with a woman, without catching some feelings at some point down the line, unless you're literally not attracted to her, and she is just something you bust a nut in, and forget about.

Especially with Exes.. Rarely does hook ups with Ex's end well.

 

[soulforge]

@soulforge why did you swipe right on her to begin with? Just curious

Pure accident I was having some drinks at the house with a pal. Wasn't drunk, but kinda tipsy.

Anyway. My pal went to use the bathroom, so I decided to look at my Bumble account.

As I was swiping away, I wasn't even concentrating and barely looking. I swiped right on a couple of hotties, and by accident swiped right on her profile.

To be honest, I wasn't sure it was her.. I kinda thought for a moment "Wait was that my ex"

Its only later that night, she messaged me in Bumble, and then the penny dropped.

So much for keeping NC.. Anyway I haven't responded back to her, and I reckon it might make me look petty, if I unmatch her.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

You know I used to have this mindset.. keeping a girl around as a rotation piece.

However often I found in reality, over a longer period of sleeping with someone, waking up with them, watching a movie together etc.. Feelings tend to develop over time. I don't think you can indefinitely have sex with a woman, without catching some feelings at some point down the line, unless you're literally not attracted to her, and she is just something you bust a nut in, and forget about.

Especially with Exes.. Rarely does hook ups with Ex's end well.

I get it.

But as a wise man once said,

"It may be easier said than done, but you still have to do it."

Here are your options.

1. As I said, keep her around as a rotation piece, leave your heart and feelings at the door.

2. Give her another chance, as there is this thing called "forgiveness", and forgiveness is divine.

3. Implement the No Contact Strategy, as it is the best proven method to either get over your ex, or bring your ex back to you. Two birds with one stone, depending on which one you prefer.

 

[soulforge]

I get it.

But as a wise man once said,

"It may be easier said than done, but you still have to do it."

Here are your options.

1. As I said, keep her around as a rotation piece, leave your heart and feelings at the door.

2. Give her another chance, as there is this thing called "forgiveness", and forgiveness is divine.

3. Implement the No Contact Strategy, as it is the best proven method to either get over your ex, or bring your ex back to you. Two birds with one stone, depending on which one you prefer.

Something for sure. That EX has a very very high sex drive and has a inscaciable appetite for getting fvked.

The fact that she is on a dating site, 4-5 weeks after break up, guaranteed she is likely hooking up already.

Can't really be forgiven that.

 

[New_Journey]

Ex girlfriend, I currently walked away from, due to her not appreciating my time and efforts in the relationship.

I ghosted her because she was barely making any effort to text me.. After 7 days of radio silence from me, she ended the relationship.

However.. she has started messaging me on bumble (Clearly she joined bumble again to meet other men)

She is intentionally guilt tripping me, blaming me for the demise of the relationship.

Should I even reply back to her false accusations? Or is ignoring her the better option.

Are you sure you're over her? If you truly are, and DGAF what she thinks. If I were you, I would run game on her and DHV, would do C&F and AM, like she's a new girl.

I mean, of course she's lonely, that type of women will never be happy, but is she's hot, another plate on your belt is not a bad idea, just realize she's not LTR material and act like it.

I would hook her up, but I'll never fall for her again cause you know where that ends. You can have fun with her while not getting attached.

If I were you, its Game On

 

[New_Journey]

Since then.. she has sent me a wall of text messages, blame shifting, gaslighting more than likely, as per usual.

She wants you to fvck her. If you're over her, use her as your slut, put it in every hole and treat her like a slut but don't give a fvck about her emotions. She is looking for a man she can chase, who ignores her when she texts, who has other women too so she can have some meaning

 

[soulforge]

Are you sure you're over her? If you truly are, and DGAF what she thinks. If I were you, I would run game on her and DHV, would do C&F and AM, like she's a new girl.

I mean, of course she's lonely, that type of women will never be happy, but is she's hot, another plate on your belt is not a bad idea, just realize she's not LTR material and act like it.

I would hook her up, but I'll never fall for her again cause you know where that ends. You can have fun with her while not getting attached.

If I were you, its Game On

I get what you're saying.. she definitely has some red flags that rule her out of LTR material. I kind knew this from day one.

However somewhere along the line, I caught some feelings for her (but not in a major way)

5 WKs of no contact and all I see her good for now is smash only

 

[soulforge]

She wants you to fvck her. If you're over her, use her as your slut, put it in every hole and treat her like a slut but don't give a fvck about her emotions. She is looking for a man she can chase, who ignores her when she texts, who has other women too so she can have some meaning

I was already smashing every hole lol.. but when I pulled back with the texting her, she pulled back too and bailed out.

 

[Barrister]

Pure accident I was having some drinks at the house with a pal. Wasn't drunk, but kinda tipsy.

Anyway. My pal went to use the bathroom, so I decided to look at my Bumble account.

As I was swiping away, I wasn't even concentrating and barely looking. I swiped right on a couple of hotties, and by accident swiped right on her profile.

To be honest, I wasn't sure it was her.. I kinda thought for a moment "Wait was that my ex"

Its only later that night, she messaged me in Bumble, and then the penny dropped.

So much for keeping NC.. Anyway I haven't responded back to her, and I reckon it might make me look petty, if I unmatch her.

First, I have a hard time buying you “accidentally” swiped right on the ex you’re currently in NC with. But regardless, absolutely unmatch her. Why in the fvck would care if it looks “petty” to her? She’s an ex now. You don’t have children with her. She’s nothing.

I have a suspicion you WANT the contact with her through the app. You’re playing with fire and delaying your ability to move on. Be smarter. You know better.