What's YOUR approach look like with stopping someone on the street?

[jhonny9546]

If I'm waiting for something and she happens to be next to me then sure, I'll ask an innocuous question to see if she'll ask one back. If she does then it's a sign of interest and I'll slowly crank up the charm while vetting her.

I don't know, guys. In my case, it works by simply looking at the surrounding environment and finding something in common. For example, I might say, "That fountain is beautiful! I've been to Rome, but I've never seen anything like it," or something similar.

One thing I've definitely noticed lately is that women who send you IOI are often dealing with some issues. Now, this isn't a 100% statement, but typically, a healthy woman will show interest after having interacted with you and understanding who you are, what you do, etc. Those who send you IOIs simply because you're "good looking" are often expressing their craving to satisfy their "sexual" needs, that their boyfriend dumped them, or they actually looking to do it, or that they're looking for an emotional boost.

Generally, healthier and more well-adjusted women don't send IOIs solely based on physical appearance. YMMV.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

It's been similar for me. Most of my interactions don't even have a direct rejection. Most of my interactions have a conversation that fizzles out within 30-60 seconds, prior to actual asking out.

Really?

I guess 30-60 seconds ain't the worse time in the world to be out of there, on a BANK ROBBERY.

I like to be out of there in 30 seconds, TOPS.

But hey, if you have a good rate success rate, based on HOWEVER long it's takes you to handle business, then keep up the good work.

That's a soft no. Of all my conversations that fizzle out before an ask out, I have no idea how many of them are actually in the market for new penis.

That's exactly why I ask if they are single!!

If she is in a relationship, it provides me a well needed REASON as to why I'm being rejected.

But if she is single, and is still disinterested, then I'll also know why.

The difference is, if I'm rejected because she has a boyfriend (or is married), then I don't count that an official rejection (since married women are off limits anyway)....and I usually try to respect relationships.

I said all that to say, you'll find out if she's in the market, by ASKING her.

I think a good portion of them already have boyfriends and aren't seeking new penis. I find the lack of knowledge there frustrating. It is possible that your more direct approach gives you better understanding over your interactions. I'm left in the dark wondering about what's going on with all of my soft no's.

That's the beauty of the direct approach. It cuts through the bullshiit and you know exactly what is going on.

As just mentioned, by asking "Are you single", I'll know why I'm being rejected and thus not left in the dark.

My hard no's are generally kind and polite too.

I have had some harsh blowouts but not that many.

Bro, I've done hundreds of approaches and I had only a handful that can be considered "harsh".

Soft no's can be difficult to stomach as well, but sometimes less difficult than hard no's and the harsh blowouts.

I agree. Just because the rejection is soft, doesn't mean it is any less difficult.

A soft rejection for me would be, like on at least 3 occasions (all at the gym), I've had cases where..

Soft rejection: Saw a woman on a elliptical..approached her.

Me: You're cute, are you single?

Her: Not interested. Sorry.

Ouchhhhh.

It wasn't harsh, but it also wasn't impolite.

Somewhere in the middle. Soft.

But, nevertheless, I'd rather my rejections be quick and direct, than for me to have stood there, thinking I'm vibing with her...only for me to give her my number and her NEVER calling me.
....

Harsh rejections: I'm at Walmart doing my thang. I see a Black chick standing in customer service line. I approach her.

Me: You're cute. Are you single?

Her: *Standing there looking at me, with a contemptuous look on her face.*

Her: Do I look single?

That was my latest harsh rejection, and I can't even remember the one before that one...that's how unlikely it is to get a harsh rejection.

When you play this game, there are always gonna be those odd ball ho's out there, that will fuk up what can be considered, the norm.

But those handful of times don't take away from the dozens upon dozens upon dozens of kind, and polite rejections.

I think both my hard and soft no's are kind and polite because I am better than average looking. Sub 5's doing cold approach will get more harsh blowouts.

Yeah, especially on a Mode One approach.

Haha.

 

[SW15]

you'll find out if she's in the market, by ASKING her.

I haven't been directly asking if she's in market. I have tended to think that women in market are more likely to have extended conversations. It's unknown if that's accurate. I interpret my quick fizzles as women mainly not in market, but I'm sure I've had some conversations fizzle before the ask out with some women who are unattached.

I do have that left in the dark feeling.

on a Mode One approach.

Sub 5 guys on looks are usually not confident enough to do Mode One approaches.

 

[Oatmeal31]

I haven't been directly asking if she's in market. I have tended to think that women in market are more likely to have extended conversations. It's unknown if that's accurate. I interpret my quick fizzles as women mainly not in market, but I'm sure I've had some conversations fizzle before the ask out with some women who are unattached.

I do have that left in the dark feeling.



Sub 5 guys on looks are usually not confident enough to do Mode One approaches.

Yeah I believe that conversations can turn things around for a girl that you just met that's on the fence. That's why I think it's good practice to aim for something that's a few minutes rather than 30 seconds and dipping.

Yeah you can get the yes girls, but what about the maybe girls? I think it's best to improve our chances and become more skillful by being a good conversationalist. I wish it were as easy to just say "hey I find you cute, let's go out" and get the best results consistently. I ****ing wish.

Yeah, some conversations do fizzle out even when it seems like she's interested. Just happens sometimes. That feeling that you're left in the dark can be haunting. leaves you wondering if there's more you coulda done

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

I haven't been directly asking if she's in market. I have tended to think that women in market are more likely to have extended conversations. It's unknown if that's accurate. I interpret my quick fizzles as women mainly not in market, but I'm sure I've had some conversations fizzle before the ask out with some women who are unattached.

I do have that left in the dark feeling.

Whewww.

Bro, you leave a lot up for speculation, I tell ya.

But if you'd rather know, than not know, the only way to know would be to ask.

Unless you want to keep the mystery in place.

Sub 5 guys on looks are usually not confident enough to do Mode One approaches.

Usually, yes.

 

[CornbreadFed]

You have yet to see a guy randomly stopping women on the street and starting conversations?

I don't see many stranger approachers at Dallas area parks or on the 2 most heavily trafficked walking paths in the area.

Nope lol, not anywhere I go to

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

.

I love how folks talk to other people about shiit that I said...instead of directly addressing me about what I said

Look at that, indirect communication runs rampant on this forum, in more ways than one.

Yeah I believe that conversations can turn things around for a girl that you just met that's on the fence.

If you are physically unattracted to a woman, there is no amount of on-the-fence conversation that will change this.

So what makes you think the same isn't true on the flipside, with women, in their attractive levels towards you?

That's why I think it's good practice to aim for something that's a few minutes rather than 30 seconds and dipping.

If you are physically unattracted to a woman after 30 seconds, then you'll be physically unattracted to her in 3 minutes, or 30 minutes.

Matters a damn about how well her "conversation game" is.

Yeah you can get the yes girls, but what about the maybe girls?

There are no maybes. Either she is physically attracted to you, or she ain't.

I think it's best to improve our chances and become more skillful by being a good conversationalist. I wish it were as easy to just say "hey I find you cute, let's go out" and get the best results consistently. I ****ing wish.

First off, you are misrepresenting my point.

No one is suggesting the idea that you will consistently get the best results (from approach, to sex) with my method.

What I am guaranteeing is that, with my method, you won't be wasting your time in an extended conversation with a woman that never had plans of having sex with you in the first place, from the moment you approached her.

"Damn, all that conversation FOR NOTHING".

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

You have yet to see a guy randomly stopping women on the street and starting conversations?

I don't see many stranger approachers at Dallas area parks or on the 2 most heavily trafficked walking paths in the area.

Bro, one of the best women I ever met, I met on a cold approach.

She treats me out to dinner, lunch, breakfast...she cooks for me, massages my back..and when I spend nights over her crib and we fall asleep after fuking, she clings on to me as if her life depends on it.

All on a cold approach...all because, I saw something I liked, and went after it...as a man is supposed to do.

I ain't wait on no damn choosing signals or IOI's, either.

 

[Swagman]

I've been using OLD exclusively since I started again. I get matches but I really don't like them... this thread has given me a lot to think about. Never cold approached before, can't even fathom going in without an IOI. Maybe this is something I need to try.

 

[ManlyMan]

With this type of approach it is important to get this girl to stop so you can have her full attention. So you step one foot into her path with one foot and deliver your opener. Putting one foot in her path will most likeley get her to stop if she is somewhat receptive to talking to a stranger.

As I have stated before. Cold approaching is not calibrated (to some people out there not us). You are a stranger approaching girls. If you can accept that is not calibrated to some folks out their I think this will get easier for you. If not gonna have to find a differnet hobby. I think that is very important to understand.

However many women will enjoy your compliments or conversation. As other people have stated 98% of the time it is a polite rejection

 

[Oatmeal31]

.

I love how folks talk to other people about shiit that I said...instead of directly addressing me about what I said

Look at that, indirect communication runs rampant on this forum, in more ways than one.



If you are physically unattracted to a woman, there is no amount of on-the-fence conversation that will change this.

So what makes you think the same isn't true on the flipside, with women, in their attractive levels towards you?



If you are physically unattracted to a woman after 30 seconds, then you'll be physically unattracted to her in 3 minutes, or 30 minutes.

Matters a damn about how well her "conversation game" is.



There are no maybes. Either she is physically attracted to you, or she ain't.



First off, you are misrepresenting my point.

No one is suggesting the idea that you will consistently get the best results (from approach, to sex) with my method.

What I am guaranteeing is that, with my method, you won't be wasting your time in an extended conversation with a woman that never had plans of having sex with you in the first place, from the moment you approached her.

"Damn, all that conversation FOR NOTHING".

You are really weird. I wasn't directing addressing you. I was contributing to the conversation and you took offense. But yeah, keep being weird. See how that 30 seconds work out for ya. Are you one of those instagram guys that only knows how to go around and repeat a pickup line that's been milked to death?

Social skills play a large part of attraction in this game. Doesn't matter how attractive you are to a majority of girls, when you don't know how to carry a conversation with a complete stranger past 30 seconds.