Hidden patterns of success

jhonny9546

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Hi there!

Since birth, there are two types of men:

The Good Guy

The first type is the one raised by parents to be a good boy. This person is incredibly capable and has above-average skills in everything he does. He is very intelligent but struggles to integrate into social groups, achieve success, or be seen as a man of value by women. Despite his intelligence and proper education, he often finds himself in positions within companies where he is indispensable but subordinate to less intelligent people of similar value.

The Bully

The second type is the one raised by parents to be "good," but by nature is unpleasant and domineering, always seeking to be the center of attention. These boys, referred to as "lively," take a different path in their upbringing. They may not be very intelligent, but for some reason, they manage to integrate better into social groups. Often, they surpass the good guy in their careers, even though the good guy would be WAY more intelligent than them. They have more success in social interactions and with women, which translates into a more prosperous career.



How many of you have noticed this pattern and perhaps experienced it firsthand? People who are socially adept but not very intelligent, such as managers or CEOs, often find themselves leading groups. On the other hand, there are highly intelligent individuals who are not very social, like software engineers or analysts, who occupy lower-ranking positions but are indispensable to the company.

Most interactions and relationships in our generation are superficial and brief. As a result, intelligent and deep individuals often find themselves at a disadvantage compared to those who can only show the superficial side of their image, necessary for frivolous interactions. They do not care about others but know how to sell themselves in the eyes of people.


This dynamic is confirmed by what I have observed in the growth of my nephews. I have two: one perfectly represents the good guy, while the other is more domineering. I already see in their lives the same patterns I noticed with my friends and in older generations.



I wonder if the good guy, with his qualities, will ever become a great manager or CEO, perhaps even better than the bully. Is there space for good guys? Are there ways to succeed socially, relationally, and professionally?

We are led to believe otherwise, but for these domineering boys, the path has always been downhill. Is there something missing for good guys to succeed? Have we identified what it is? If it were merely about lacking qualities, are they learnable or innate?

ps: by a good guy i don't mean the AFC guy but a good guy with values and a backbone. That is the starting point.
 

FlirtLife

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Since birth, there are two types of men:

The Good Guy

The first type is the one raised by parents to be a good boy. This person is incredibly capable and has above-average skills in everything he does.
If someone doesn't have "above-average skills in everything", they must be a "Bully"?

I think you pulled this out of your ass.
 

FlirtLife

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"The Good Guy" has "above-average skills in everything" - those are your words. You also said there are only two categories. Everyone who does not have "above-average skills in everything" must be in the other category. Or you're wrong - which I find more likely.
 

jaygreenb

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Hi there!

Since birth, there are two types of men:

The Good Guy

The first type is the one raised by parents to be a good boy. This person is incredibly capable and has above-average skills in everything he does. He is very intelligent but struggles to integrate into social groups, achieve success, or be seen as a man of value by women. Despite his intelligence and proper education, he often finds himself in positions within companies where he is indispensable but subordinate to less intelligent people of similar value.

The Bully

The second type is the one raised by parents to be "good," but by nature is unpleasant and domineering, always seeking to be the center of attention. These boys, referred to as "lively," take a different path in their upbringing. They may not be very intelligent, but for some reason, they manage to integrate better into social groups. Often, they surpass the good guy in their careers, even though the good guy would be WAY more intelligent than them. They have more success in social interactions and with women, which translates into a more prosperous career.



How many of you have noticed this pattern and perhaps experienced it firsthand? People who are socially adept but not very intelligent, such as managers or CEOs, often find themselves leading groups. On the other hand, there are highly intelligent individuals who are not very social, like software engineers or analysts, who occupy lower-ranking positions but are indispensable to the company.

Most interactions and relationships in our generation are superficial and brief. As a result, intelligent and deep individuals often find themselves at a disadvantage compared to those who can only show the superficial side of their image, necessary for frivolous interactions. They do not care about others but know how to sell themselves in the eyes of people.


This dynamic is confirmed by what I have observed in the growth of my nephews. I have two: one perfectly represents the good guy, while the other is more domineering. I already see in their lives the same patterns I noticed with my friends and in older generations.



I wonder if the good guy, with his qualities, will ever become a great manager or CEO, perhaps even better than the bully. Is there space for good guys? Are there ways to succeed socially, relationally, and professionally?

We are led to believe otherwise, but for these domineering boys, the path has always been downhill. Is there something missing for good guys to succeed? Have we identified what it is? If it were merely about lacking qualities, are they learnable or innate?

ps: by a good guy i don't mean the AFC guy but a good guy with values and a backbone. That is the starting point.
Can't get on board with this but just a few points.

Social skills are incredibly important whether playing the corporate game, managing people, running a business or being able to sell. Without this your value will be limited directly to your own personal labor which is going to severely cap your earning potential.

The intelligent and deep individual "good guy" often times gets limited because they lack the confidence to take on risk. Whether that starting a business, investing, changing careers etc. Confidence and willingness to take calculated risks is one the key traits needed to get past mediocrity.
 

jhonny9546

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The intelligent and deep individual "good guy" often times gets limited because they lack the confidence to take on risk. Whether that starting a business, investing, changing careers etc. Confidence and willingness to take calculated risks is one the key traits needed to get past mediocrity.
I think this is a good point!
Very good point or really centered the point.

Why this happen?
 

sangheilios

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Can't get on board with this but just a few points.

Social skills are incredibly important whether playing the corporate game, managing people, running a business or being able to sell. Without this your value will be limited directly to your own personal labor which is going to severely cap your earning potential.

The intelligent and deep individual "good guy" often times gets limited because they lack the confidence to take on risk. Whether that starting a business, investing, changing careers etc. Confidence and willingness to take calculated risks is one the key traits needed to get past mediocrity.
I wouldn't even use the term "good guy" to describe the willingness, or rather unwillingness, to take risks. Most people are risk adverse, particularly when it comes to career, finance and where they choose to live.

Most people will not pick up and move to a new place where they don't know anyone. You literally leave your support system behind and essentially have to build up your social network on your own from scratch. I'm specifically referring to people who are single and on their own, it's very different if you have a family who is moving with you. Something like this could honestly be of huge benefit for many young and single guys who may not like the area they are in for social/mating market reasons.

As for investing. I can't tell you how many times I've heard people complain about the stock market and how they can just lose all their money. If you aren't cherry picking stocks and investing with a firm that allocates the assets for you, that's a ticket for long term growth. This fearful mindset is the reason why people avoid investing, particularly at ideal times to be accumulating, and they either full blown avoid it all together or they make some minor contributions with their 401k program at their company.

As for business. In my opinion, most people are better off not pursuing stuff like this, as it will require a lot more of your time and energy than a regular job for potential earnings that honestly might not be worth it. It' such a hyper competitive market today that it can be very difficult to really get things going, I could think of way easier ways to make money. It's a huge reason why fields like law are heavily overvalued because people don't consider that they are actively competing against people that are about as competent and intelligent as they are, if not more so, AND potentially with people who are willing to out work you and everyone else in the room.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Since birth, there are two types of men:
No.
Stop with your infantile theories. Even a child knows there are more than two types of men; of women; of cats; of dogs.

Simplifying by generalising isn't beneficial to anyone.
 

oOh Nasty

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No.
Stop with your infantile theories. Even a child knows there are more than two types of men; of women; of cats; of dogs.

Simplifying by generalising isn't beneficial to anyone.
Suggesting he stop theorizing means he has to go out into the real world and actually start experiencing things. Not sure if he's ready for that.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Suggesting he stop theorizing means he has to go out into the real world and actually start experiencing things. Not sure if he's ready for that.
Don't underestimate the desire to please.
 
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