Can't get a solid dating rotation going for love nor money

[Bingo-Player]

I've had a lot of sex this year probably the most I've had in a while , problem is it's all been causual flings / one night stands , usually same day lays etc and

I'm not intentionally setting out for this dynamic I just keep randomly meeting these types of women where I'm really not that bothered about them , but they put effort in with me and we just end up flirting / touching / kissing and quickly having sex ....after I usually couldn't care less wether I see the girls again or not

The reality is I actually WANT to date properly but I can't seem to find any women that fit this criteria

IDK wtf is going on I have little issue in approaching or talking to women building tension etc but I just can't seem to get women into a familiar dating rotation

The very few candidates I do meet that I feel could be suitable for longer term dating I slow down with and they just seem to rapidly go cold with me

I'm at an age where I just want like 2-3 women I can do activities with and build that tension up slowly , then have regular good sex with and eventually progress one to GF status and hopefully onto my future wife

I can't even seem to get them out on a "first date"

Anyone else finding this ? Is dating in the traditional sense just completely fvcked ? or am I just not doing something right ?

One thing I have done is tried to tone the "fvck boy" vibes down , its hard though when you know women will usually respond positively to bad behaviour


Sigh

 

[BillyPilgrim]

The candidates you find "suitable for long term dating" may be very picky themselves. Maybe expand your criteria for suitable dating prospects, meet them on OLD and take some time to get to know them prior to a first meet/date. Or maybe you're "slowing down" too much and not generating tingles. A good balance may be to entice tingles while getting to know them, whilst avoiding the picky LTR-seeking ones.

 

[Bingo-Player]

I don't use OLD seems to take ages to set anything up I get bored

You need to be ridiculously sharp from the word go to capture attention and often its for women that are single for good reason

its more time consuming and demotivating than actually going out and meeting people IRL , at least then you have a solid initial judgment of wether your interested

Aware I have restricted sample size and this obviously isn't the case on a wider scale it just feels like I'm in a very very wierd period of my dating life where it feels like nobody I meet seems to want to take dating / relationship seriously

Its all just very " whatever happens ,happens" and " oh well onto the next"

I'm also meeting very very avoidant types of women which again is something I am not into

 

[Clockwerk50]

Most people would say that it is because you are not ****ing them well enough and that’s the main reason why they are not coming back.

I believe that, often, after the first time you have sex with someone, you might experience disappointing or unpleasant feelings towards that person. This is because your perception of them shifts from idolizing them and thinking they are cool to seeing them as weak and flawed for giving in so easily.

One out of the two ways to keep them around is to prevent the relationship to fall in familiarity, comfort, and routine. This means keeping up the effort before you had sex by continuing proving yourself, focusing your attention on them, keeping the novelty with lighthearted and pleasant actions, or you can cause drama by inflicting pain and pulling back. Again, the goal is not make the relationship fall into a monotonous routine.

The second one is what the red pill gurus suggest and that is to start acting aloof, cold, or sometimes by showing interest in another person. This technique will make them feel insecure and make them cling to you. This is the “spinning plates” theory where you keep working on yourself, text them once per week, alternating warmth with coldness, until they eventually break or you make it exclusive.

Not sure which one would work best in your situation or lifestyle.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Most people would say that it is because you are not ****ing them well enough and that’s the main reason why they are not coming back.

I believe that, often, after the first time you have sex with someone, you might experience disappointing or unpleasant feelings towards that person. This is because your perception of them shifts from idolizing them and thinking they are cool to seeing them as weak and flawed for giving in so easily.

The casual flings I've had have been with women I wouldn't really want to be coming back

although a few have tried , that's not the problem

The problem is I'm not meeting the types of women whom I feel aren't anywhere near suitable to date and the few I do meet seem to be avoidant

 

[Gamisch]

Maybe it has something to do with the type of women you attract . I've learned that I attract a certain type ( mostly women that have something "off " about them). BUT, they do go all fecking in on me. This gave me a lotta peace of mind.

Know your bracket like the back of your hand!!

Its oke to wanna have great connections with women and build something real. Never forget we were build to provide and protect women. One time lays offer none of that and as you've noticed becomes actually pretty dull after a while.

Nevertheless, in order to get fish you need fish. So I'd suggest you keep doing what you're doing untill you do find one that lingers around for a longer time. You have volume, now its a matter of vetting the right ones.

 

[Crown]

I've had a lot of sex this year probably the most I've had in a while , problem is it's all been causual flings / one night stands , usually same day lays etc and

I'm not intentionally setting out for this dynamic I just keep randomly meeting these types of women where I'm really not that bothered about them , but they put effort in with me and we just end up flirting / touching / kissing and quickly having sex ....after I usually couldn't care less wether I see the girls again or not

The reality is I actually WANT to date properly but I can't seem to find any women that fit this criteria

IDK wtf is going on I have little issue in approaching or talking to women building tension etc but I just can't seem to get women into a familiar dating rotation

The very few candidates I do meet that I feel could be suitable for longer term dating I slow down with and they just seem to rapidly go cold with me

I'm at an age where I just want like 2-3 women I can do activities with and build that tension up slowly , then have regular good sex with and eventually progress one to GF status and hopefully onto my future wife

I can't even seem to get them out on a "first date"

Anyone else finding this ? Is dating in the traditional sense just completely fvcked ? or am I just not doing something right ?

One thing I have done is tried to tone the "fvck boy" vibes down , its hard though when you know women will usually respond positively to bad behaviour


Sigh

So I guess you don't care about body count, right ? Because you actually go around and increase women's sexual partner count.

I'm being intentionally ironic here, because red pill people like you will then complain that women with high body count are to be avoid for X reason, but you keep adding up to that number. It's people like you that make dating harder: your "unbothering" hardens women social defenses for later dating partners.

But I guess you must be happy, you emptied your balls and the consequences for the women you have been with is not of your concern.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Having meaningless sex and actually dating are two different things. Unfortunately, you are deep in the RP spectrum and will have to go through a rehab process. First question, how are you meeting these women you have had sex with?

 

[Barrister]

@Bingo-Player

It sounds like this is more about the fact you don't care for the women in the first place very much and are just banging them to have sex. I have gone through these periods before where I am not crazy about anyone on my roster and I become very laissez faire about whether anything continues with them or not.

You simply aren't meeting the right types of women. I don't blame you for not even bothering with OLD. But cold approach can have a lot of variation in quality itself depending on where you are going to pick up women. You just need to get some higher quality women (or perhaps just women you are more attracted to to begin with).

 

[pipeman84]

So I guess you don't care about body count, right ? Because you actually go around and increase women's sexual partner count.

I'm being intentionally ironic here, because red pill people like you will then complain that women with high body count are to be avoid for X reason, but you keep adding up to that number. It's people like you that make dating harder: your "unbothering" hardens women social defenses for later dating partners.

That's as logical as reprimanding someone who gets into a taxi because that will somehow affect the mileage of the brand new Porsche that's on the show room floor.
Those hoes will still be hoes no matter if OP is having sex with them or not.

But I guess you must be happy, you emptied your balls and the consequences for the women you have been with is not of your concern.

Why do you make it sound as if those women have been coerced into it? They are adults fully aware of the consequences.

OP, I think it's a matter of what you put out is what you get back. You put out a fvck boy vibe, you get back the hoes.

 

[Crown]

That's as logical as reprimanding someone who gets into a taxi because that will somehow affect the mileage of the brand new Porsche that's on the show room floor.
Those hoes will still be hoes no matter if OP is having sex with them or not.


Why do you make it sound as if those women have been coerced into it? They are adults fully aware of the consequences.

OP, I think it's a matter of what you put out is what you get back. You put out a fvck boy vibe, you get back the hoes.

Where did OP say they wanted to just to ****? OP clearly says he left and used them.

Perhaps, these girls wanted to build a relationship and he only saw them as hole ?

Can't wait for your daughter or grand child to one day go out with a guy, explore her sexuality and be treated as a hoe.

 

[pipeman84]

Where did OP say they wanted to just to ****? OP clearly says he left and used them.

Perhaps, these girls wanted to build a relationship and he only saw them as hole ?

Can't wait for your daughter or grand child to one day go out with a guy, explore her sexuality and be treated as a hoe.

You appear to have reading comprehension, so let me make it easy for you. That's what OP said:

problem is it's all been causual flings / one night stands , usually same day lays etc

In other words, slvts. Exploring sexuality is an euphemism for being a slvt.
If they were relationship material, then OP wouldn't have been able to kiss them, let alone have sex with them.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Why don't you just start off fvcking thema nd then just continue with FWB/dating?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Most people would say that it is because you are not ****ing them well enough and that’s the main reason why they are not coming back.

I believe that, often, after the first time you have sex with someone, you might experience disappointing or unpleasant feelings towards that person. This is because your perception of them shifts from idolizing them and thinking they are cool to seeing them as weak and flawed for giving in so easily.

One out of the two ways to keep them around is to prevent the relationship to fall in familiarity, comfort, and routine. This means keeping up the effort before you had sex by continuing proving yourself, focusing your attention on them, keeping the novelty with lighthearted and pleasant actions, or you can cause drama by inflicting pain and pulling back. Again, the goal is not make the relationship fall into a monotonous routine.

The second one is what the red pill gurus suggest and that is to start acting aloof, cold, or sometimes by showing interest in another person. This technique will make them feel insecure and make them cling to you. This is the “spinning plates” theory where you keep working on yourself, text them once per week, alternating warmth with coldness, until they eventually break or you make it exclusive.

Not sure which one would work best in your situation or lifestyle.

Ive never done the text once per week thing. Most women I date we have some form of communication daily, even if it's only a text or two.

IMO, this is advocated because most people have poor text communication skills or say weird/needy things via text.

I have gotten to the point where I could text as much as I want and it wouldn't make a difference. The way you text and the things you say are a direct reflection of your internal belief system about you...it's just much clearer for someone to see if you are unsure or unconfident in yourself via text because the words are right there for you to read over and over again

 

[Solomon]

OP are you not into these girls? I may be projecting here but for me I prefer to have sex having an emotional connection meaning that I enjoy bantering, flirting, communicating etc. Not saying I haven't done ONS certainly have but if it's a girl I don't care to see again I don't make an effort

Could it be maybe your not 100% attracted to the girls? that could be another one

The last one is simple, the girls give it up easy, you lose interest in the hunt, this happens to me as well.

The only thing is if the sex was decent/good for the girls you should at least be getting callbacks, but if you ain't bunkerbustering like they want or should well

 

[zekko]

I've had a lot of sex this year probably the most I've had in a while , problem is it's all been causual flings / one night stands , usually same day lays etc and

It strikes me that I bet there are a lot of guys on this forum who would love to be in your place.

It also reminds me a song by Toto: "Hold the line, love isn't always on time". In other words, you can't just conjure up a woman who is girlfriend/LTR material. Just keep going, and eventually you will meet her. I don't know about the bit about having two or three and then narrowing it down, usually when I've met those "special girls", it's been apparent pretty quickly.

 

[Crown]

You appear to have reading comprehension, so let me make it easy for you. That's what OP said:

In other words, slvts. Exploring sexuality is an euphemism for being a slvt.
If they were relationship material, then OP wouldn't have been able to kiss them, let alone have sex with them.

Get out of your our cave, old man. The world is changing and keeping women to a leash for your mental insecurities about other dudes is not a concern for humans with desires. Human life is about experimenting and generating new events, it's religious greco-roman beliefs like yours that make female-male relationships complicated - because you're only thinking with your d*ck.

 

[Gamisch]

It strikes me that I bet there are a lot of guys on this forum who would love to be in your place.

It also reminds me a song by Toto: "Hold the line, love isn't always on time". In other words, you can't just conjure up a woman who is girlfriend/LTR material. Just keep going, and eventually you will meet her. I don't know about the bit about having two or three and then narrowing it down, usually when I've met those "special girls", it's been apparent pretty quickly.

Untill they are REALLY in his position.

I can probably come up with more than a thousand reasons why it's not beneficiary to live such a lifestyle long term. From the top of my head just a few:

Std's
Getting old alone
Getting hurt over and over again
Putting on a mask reducing yourself to a shell of yourself instead of being the real you
Becoming an emotional robot
Losing faith in the opposite sex( easy lays)


I can go on and on. The ultimate place to be for a man is building a dynasty, nourish it and watch it grow. So yes, TONS of men wanna be in his position, but mostly to transition to what I just said. But if you don't even get the chance to be visible to women...then that dynasty is a far cry.

OP will get there and find his way , he is a smart dude.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Get out of your our cave, old man. The world is changing and keeping women to a leash for your mental insecurities about other dudes is not a concern for humans with desires. Human life is about experimenting and generating new events, it's religious greco-roman beliefs like yours that make female-male relationships complicated - because you're only thinking with your d*ck.

If human life is about experimenting I don’t understand your case against women and men sleeping around. You might not get very far by being the morality police, especially when you are trying to save these promiscuous men and women by putting them in handcuffs just because they do not follow your standards.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Having meaningless sex and actually dating are two different things. Unfortunately, you are deep in the RP spectrum and will have to go through a rehab process. First question, how are you meeting these women you have had sex with?

Problem is we all know that blue pill stuff gets you nowhere fast , women are adept at categorising men from virtually the first encounter

They will all SAY that they want to be treated right with blue pill male behaviour but then without much of a second thought will go and have sex with a man that's demonstrating the opposite

That's the cold light of day