Dating ex ****buddie

[manfromitaly]

Hi everyone, I started dating a girl again with whom I had had sex for a couple of months about 3 years ago, we were **** buddies, we saw each other every now and then, at my house, nothing more.

We met again and started dating, we went to the beach together, I went out with her and her friends, had breakfast together and obviously we had sex several times.

The problem is that I'm going through a difficult time, I live with my grandfather who is very ill at the moment, so much so that I had to leave work a few weeks before the end of the contract to be close to him as he is due to have a very difficult operation soon.

I like this girl but she doesn't make me feel comfortable, I admit that maybe I have a crush.

She always talks to me about colleagues who hit on her, about ex-boyfriends, in short she doesn't give me certainties and maybe at the moment I need someone who cares about me.

Should I slowly detach myself and limit our meetings in your opinion?

I don't understand if she tells me certain things on purpose to make me jealous

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Have you possibly done the same to her at any time?

 

[manfromitaly]

Have you possibly done the same to her at any time?

I don't think so, 3 years ago we had this very superficial acquaintance, I'm the one who broke it off. We had never gone out together, apart from the first evening, the rest of the meetings at my house. The problem now is that from the moment we start going out together, going to the beach, going out with her friends, I expect something more from her, there's no way she'll talk to me about other men. At these points we limit the meetings and go back to how we were 3 years ago without obligation

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I don't understand if she tells me certain things on purpose to make me jealous

Are you sure you're Italian?
You don't recognise how she's trying to get your attention?

 

[manfromitaly]

Are you sure you're Italian?
You don't recognise how she's trying to get your attention?

Yes but it's not the time, my grandfather is sick and I'm down in the dumps, all I have left is him. I expect some understanding from a girl, not that she makes me jealous or goes out with colleagues who I know are hitting on her. It doesn't help me

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I expect some understanding from a girl, not that she makes me jealous or goes out with colleagues who I know are hitting on her. It doesn't help me

No, but you do recognise that she's doing this to get more attention, yes? It's your decision if you give her what she wants, or give her what she needs.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I don't think so, 3 years ago we had this very superficial acquaintance, I'm the one who broke it off. We had never gone out together, apart from the first evening, the rest of the meetings at my house. The problem now is that from the moment we start going out together, going to the beach, going out with her friends, I expect something more from her, there's no way she'll talk to me about other men. At these points we limit the meetings and go back to how we were 3 years ago without obligation

The problem is your expectations. You assume because you are dating she is in a de facto relationship which is not the way it works.

This is the source of many mens issues in these situations. You assume it's more than it is.

 

[manfromitaly]

We talked about it, she told me not to expect anything serious but to be **** buddies like before, so we'll only see each other on certain occasions, avoiding meeting during the day or with her friends. I told her that's fine but of course I'll look around as long as I need more at the moment. Thanks for the advice, I was crushing on the wrong person

 

[BackInTheGame78]

We talked about it, she told me not to expect anything serious but to be **** buddies like before, so we'll only see each other on certain occasions, avoiding meeting during the day or with her friends. I told her that's fine but of course I'll look around as long as I need more at the moment. Thanks for the advice, I was crushing on the wrong person

Basically it means she is between relationships and wants to fvck but when she finds someone else she will be gone again...

Good you found out and now you can do the same.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Jesus with a leaf blower she’s a cold-ass beyatch, but then again a lot of them are…

At least she put you on notice.

 

[Canadian_Man]

Sounds like you were being tried out for something potentially more serious, but that has been rescinded now.

So now you're left with a choice of what you want in the situation.

i.e.,
Accept what's offered (and be okay with it) or leave

 

[manfromitaly]

I have to be honest, I was getting fond of her, but that's okay, I'm happy with sex, I feel great with her in bed. Obviously I'll try it with other girls

 

[manfromitaly]

Don't worry, everything is resolved, we just made the mistake of meeting up with her friends and on other occasions and I thought she too wanted something more, but we made things clear

 

[manfromitaly]

Returning to the discussion with this girl, what would you do now, would you immediately ask to meet for sex, or would you wait a few days?

 

[manfromitaly]

The last time we did this was almost a week ago

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Tell her your nuts need unloading.

 

[manfromitaly]

I ask for your opinion, in the last month I went to see her where she works (in a bar, I go for coffee every now and then), she understood that I had a crush and said that she didn't want anything serious.

But I he said we could go out for a drink but that at the moment it would be better if nothing else happened. All this more than a month ago.

Since we are close, I told her recently that I was fine and that I had had sex with other girls in the meantime. Everything seems back to normal.

A few days ago I told her that we could have a drink together, she said okay but don't expect to have sex, let's go out as friends, I replied okay but obviously I'll aim to have sex, I couldn't tell her then no because I wouldn't have had the opportunity to play my cards.

I want to add that a friend of hers hit on me over text and she seems to be offended. It seems like she got a little jealous.

Having said that, when I see her she always seeks physical contact with me, she comes to say hello and wants to be hugged.

It could just be because he's looking for attention and using me. But sex has always gone well between us, and I'm honest, I feel great about it, which is why I would like to take her to bed again.

What would you do?

Would you invite her over for a drink or would it be better to leave it aside for now?

She is the girl who gave me the most satisfaction in bed. That's why I want to see it again

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I ask for your opinion, in the last month I went to see her where she works (in a bar, I go for coffee every now and then), she understood that I had a crush and said that she didn't want anything serious.

But I he said we could go out for a drink but that at the moment it would be better if nothing else happened. All this more than a month ago.

Since we are close, I told her recently that I was fine and that I had had sex with other girls in the meantime. Everything seems back to normal.

A few days ago I told her that we could have a drink together, she said okay but don't expect to have sex, let's go out as friends, I replied okay but obviously I'll aim to have sex, I couldn't tell her then no because I wouldn't have had the opportunity to play my cards.

I want to add that a friend of hers hit on me over text and she seems to be offended. It seems like she got a little jealous.

Having said that, when I see her she always seeks physical contact with me, she comes to say hello and wants to be hugged.

It could just be because he's looking for attention and using me. But sex has always gone well between us, and I'm honest, I feel great about it, which is why I would like to take her to bed again.

What would you do?

Would you invite her over for a drink or would it be better to leave it aside for now?

She is the girl who gave me the most satisfaction in bed. That's why I want to see it again

You need to stop trying to make things more serious than they are with her and just enjoy the sex while it lasts.

Never understand why men want to turn into mushy peas when a woman has sex with them and screw themselves over by scaring the woman away.

Stop being so needy. It's not attractive.

 

[manfromitaly]

I'm not needy, I've seen her 4/5 times at the bar in the last 2 months.

I had a crush before, I can't help it.

But now I'm fine, I just want to take her to bed because sex with her satisfies me.

I was just wondering if it was worth it or if it all went up in smoke when she realized I had a crush