Emotional Intelligence

[Divorced w 3]

 

[Solomon]

A thread that is not talked about enough and a lot of men fail at it due to the fact that we are in an era where communication skills are rapidly declining not just in women but men as well

Something that has helped my EI is just to listen, even if you don't wanna hear a woman rant and ramble just STFU and listen. Women telling on themselves is so true the problem is most men don't listen. You should always be the one doing more listening and less talking, study people it will help your communication tremendously

Also empathy is important yes I know you don't wanna hear her sob stories about her ex-husband cheating on her or boyfriend beating her but having empathy goes a long way. I use to have more of that when I was younger but a lot of men who can't connect with women on an emotional level. You have to ask yourself do you have empathy for them? there a lot of guys who learn or do game that have selfish or even psychopathic tendencies but that's another topic for another thread

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Yeah I just got off the phone with a squeeze and she rambled for 1:42, if she wasn’t so fine I wouldn’t have even been on for a minute.

Just smile and wave boys, smile and wave…

 

[Mertz09]

“the problem is most men don’t listen”

Very true. This includes most of my good friends.

 

[Solomon]

“the problem is most men don’t listen”

Very true. This includes most of my good friends.

Blows my mind, took me a long a$$ time to figure out but once you listen and make a woman comfortable with no judgement she will tell you her deepest/darkest secrets. Most men ain't ready for that action though

 

[BaronOfHair]

Also empathy is important

Importantly(and dangerously)overrated https://stateofmindpodcast.libsyn.com/why-empathy-is-not-helpful-in-decision-making-relationships

 

[Bingo-Player]

Blows my mind, took me a long a$$ time to figure out but once you listen and make a woman comfortable with no judgement she will tell you her deepest/darkest secrets. Most men ain't ready for that action though

If they are anything like the ones ive heard most men aren't going to want to hear them

there's nothing particularly exciting or enlightening hearing about how she got fvcked by 4 dudes in her university room one night and really enjoyed it

A chick I slept with a couple of weekends back told me she had done DP ( 2 d1cks at once )

it didn't do a lot for me

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

If she can't openly share wth a man she cannot emotionally connect with him. Seduction is rooted in understanding her emotional needs. This requires listening to gain understanding.

That is different than listening whilst impatiently waiting to speak. In listening to make your own point you will miss much of what she is saying because your brain is focused on what you plan to say rather than what she is saying. You'll miss opportunities to understand her and what her needs are - you'll miss the roadmap to seduction.

This is why PUA artists always say she should do most of the talking on a date. It's not so you the man remain mysterious. That's an element but it's not as important as learning about her, your target or prey.

The more you listen to understand the more seduction tools you have in your toolbox.

But most men overlook the value of listening to understand and that is one reason why men who are charming and successful with women are relatively rare (and sought after by said women.)

I know how to listen to men. It is one of the things men find deeply irrestistable about me. They feel seen and understood. It leads to men falling in love because they feel an emotional connection.

Listening is a tremendous skill. It is also something great leaders do often and well.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Blows my mind, took me a long a$$ time to figure out but once you listen and make a woman comfortable with no judgement she will tell you her deepest/darkest secrets. Most men ain't ready for that action though

And you'll never run out of things to talk about because they give you like 3-4 segues into different topics you can ask them about or talk about every exchange...but most men are too busy thinking about the next thing they want to say instead of actively listening.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Blows my mind, took me a long a$$ time to figure out but once you listen and make a woman comfortable with no judgement she will tell you her deepest/darkest secrets. Most men ain't ready for that action though

That's the keyword. Listen without judging. If you show the slightest negativity about their 'confessions', they will clam up.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

 

[jhonny9546]

Advice from the old lady:

If she can't openly share wth a man she cannot emotionally connect with him. Seduction is rooted in understanding her emotional needs. This requires listening to gain understanding.

That is different than listening whilst impatiently waiting to speak. In listening to make your own point you will miss much of what she is saying because your brain is focused on what you plan to say rather than what she is saying. You'll miss opportunities to understand her and what her needs are - you'll miss the roadmap to seduction.

This is why PUA artists always say she should do most of the talking on a date. It's not so you the man remain mysterious. That's an element but it's not as important as learning about her, your target or prey.

The more you listen to understand the more seduction tools you have in your toolbox.

But most men overlook the value of listening to understand and that is one reason why men who are charming and successful with women are relatively rare (and sought after by said women.)

I know how to listen to men. It is one of the things men find deeply irrestistable about me. They feel seen and understood. It leads to men falling in love because they feel an emotional connection.

Listening is a tremendous skill. It is also something great leaders do often and well.

I have a big problem: I can listen very well, and women often tell me how they can relax with me. However, I don’t want to come across as a beta male because I feel like I’m giving them too much of my time.

How do you manage to be good at listening while also reminding the other person that you’re not there to do that for your whole life, because you have other things to do? I want to approach this in a mature way. (Women often talk but don’t want solutions to their problems, so how do you end the conversation on a positive note?)

Also, what are the triggers that usually start the “deep conversation” thing?

 

[BaronOfHair]

I have a big problem: I can listen very well, and women often tell me how they can relax with me

You're a girlfriend/unlicensed therapist hybrid then

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I have a big problem: I can listen very well, and women often tell me how they can relax with me. However, I don’t want to come across as a beta male because I feel like I’m giving them too much of my time.

Have you ever chaired a meeting? If you had, you'd know when to cut off the ramblers and get other people to speak their piece.

You're a girlfriend/unlicensed therapist hybrid then

I agree. Don't become her therapist.

 

[jhonny9546]

I agree. Don't become her therapist.

How do you know you've crossed the treshold?

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

How do you know you've crossed the treshold?

When all you do is talk about her problems.