Gym girls? And would like some life advice.

lubstur

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I've switched to a 24 hr gym because my college gym closes too early.

The girls at this gym seem different, they're prob same age or little bit older (I can't tell), they don't hang in cliques, gym seems more serious to them than social, some come w/ their bf, some are alone, some wear really skimpy yoga shorts.

These type of girls ok w/ getting hit on? What's your experience?

*btw, law school ****n sucks right now, getting closer to finals and I am so far behind... I've gained weight since last year and I'm trying to slowly cut, I moved into a new condo (it's beautiful), I have some money to invest for myself (looking for new clothes after I lose weight), and I'm trying to find some time to start going out/dating at the end of this year. Any suggestions or tips is appreciated.
 

SW15

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I've switched to a 24 hr gym because my college gym closes too early.
Gyms on college campuses that cater to undergraduate and graduate level students are going to have a different feel than gyms that cater to working world crowd.

I would rather have access to a gym that caters to the undergraduate and graduate level crowd. It'd be awesome to be a college junior again and hit on college freshmen - juniors at the college campus gym.


The girls at this gym seem different, they're prob same age or little bit older (I can't tell), they don't hang in cliques, gym seems more serious to them than social, some come w/ their bf, some are alone, some wear really skimpy yoga shorts.

These type of girls ok w/ getting hit on? What's your experience?
You can definitely hit on women at the typical big box type gym. Big box chain brands include 24 Hour Fitness, LA Fitness, Planet Fitness, Lifetime, and Equinox. Each of those brands has a slightly different vibe than the others.

The general gym floor is a more difficult environment for approaching. Most women wear earbuds and are discouraging approaches. Some big box gyms offer group fitness classes. Group fitness classes solve the earbud problem and offer great ratios. Most fitness class formats are at least 2/3rd women. Good luck getting that ratio anywhere else. The biggest problem with group fitness classes is that a lot of women are not very sociable before or after classes, even without the earbuds. Many will dart out of classes quickly before they can even be approached or start playing with their smartphones right away at the end of classes.
 

Manure Spherian

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These type of girls ok w/ getting hit on? What's your experience?
You don’t have to hit on women with a cold approach at a place you’ll see them over and over. You can strike up conversation as you would with anyone there, speak to them as you see them, and if there’s IOI, ask them out.

I think cold approach without IOI is goofy in all situations.
 

SW15

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I think cold approach without IOI is goofy in all situations.
It's difficult to only do cold approaches when an IOI is observed first. Most men don't receive a lot of IOIs.

I have been known to fish for IOIs in daygame by making strong eye contact and smiling at a woman. I see who smiles back at me. Most don't.

If a man needs an IOI first to do an approach, it will reduce approach volume. That said, the approaches with IOIs present are far more likely to result in a meaningful conversation that results in a first date arranged.

Approaches without IOIs generally lead to harsh rejections or soft rejections (conversations that go nowhere but are cordial). It's much more difficult to approach without an IOI and have it lead to a date arranged.
 
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Manure Spherian

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Approaches without IOIs generally lead to harsh rejections or soft rejections (conversations that go nowhere but are cordial). It's much more difficult to approach without an IOI and have it lead to date arranged.
I consider them intrusive and awkward. Why would someone need such volume of conversations?
And yes, most men do not receive IOI’s. Women don’t care to look at or talk to most men they don’t know. I accepted that when I was single.
 

SW15

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I consider them intrusive and awkward. Why would someone need such volume of conversations?
Dating has some commonality with both marketing and sales.

Cold approaches without IOIs vs. cold approaching with IOIs is analogous to the concepts of permission marketing vs. interruption marketing in the marketing discipline.

In the past, the advertising component of marketing was strongly oriented towards interruption marketing. Radio advertisements, television advertisements, print advertising, direct mail, billboards, and a few other forms of interruption marketing dominated. This was roughly true from the 1950s-1990s. It's less true now for a brand to be successful solely on interruption marketing.

There has been more of an orientation towards permission marketing in the last 20-25 years. Permission marketing is sending marketing messages on social media with opted-in followers, email marketing with an opted in email list (not a purchased email list).

Approaching a stranger with IOIs would be permission marketing and any other approaches are closer to interruption marketing. It's not a perfect comparison but it works well enough.

I consider them intrusive and awkward. Why would someone need such volume of conversations?
And yes, most men do not receive IOI’s. Women don’t care to look at or talk to most men they don’t know. I accepted that when I was single.
Intrusive and awkward is an interruption. There is more of that perception now around interruption marketing for brands and in our own social lives. People are less open to random interactions from strangers in public as compared to points in the past. This change really started when more and more households got high speed internet at home and later smartphones. Every entity (both brands and people) are competing for someone's attention.

There's a need for more volume of conversations because there's less efficiency with interruption marketing than there once was.

There are some approach tactics that are gray area between interruption/permission. There's a difference between approaching a woman walking the street or on an urban walking path vs. approaching a woman in your co-ed sports league or before/after your fitness class with her. Both are approaches of strangers but the latter one is a little less intrusive. The latter one is still somewhat of an interruption.

A lot of approaches on a general gym floor in a big box gym are going to lean more towards interruption marketing.
 

Macadellic

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The times I have dated girls from the gym or at CrossFit has happened in the following way.

I go at the same time consistently. Over a span of month(s) I have become friends with other men. We then have a great group (at this point I want to highlight that I’m not trying to “pick up” on men for a friendship). Please understand what I have just said. If you don’t understand, I’ll say it in another way.

I wasn’t trying to “pick up” girls at the gym or CrossFit but over time and talking with them like a normal human being I became friends with both men and women.

Then the ladies begin to ask things like, “what are you doing this weekend?”

OP,
You should know what to do next.

Godspeed,
Macadellic
 
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