Cringe Lunch or personal Social Experiment?

[corrector]

Dude, I know you feel your limitations are too much to overcome, but you are your own worst problem.

When you told me you couldn’t do pushups at home or good mornings (because there's not enough space) I wanted to fly out there and thwap you on the head.

You need to do more, you spend too much time in your vr headset and online and not enough time pursuing self-improvement. Too many platitudes bro, not enough action.

This is your bi-annual wake up call.

I dont use VR on long time. Told you the full time job is oppressive to my personal time. The biggest thing I can do to free up time is literally to quit my job.

Talk about which, I made a record breaking level of sales on the same day I had that lunch. Perhaps some bad luck in some area of life translates to good elsewhere. Maybe I will make record breaking sales again tomorrow too.

 

[corrector]

I'm still finding it hard to dismiss the whole thing as "politeness".

She could have simply removed herself from the table at that time. There were other guys in the room. Why didn't she get up and sit beside them instead? She could have excused herself and left the room altogether 5 min after I sat down, then go in another room or part of the cafeteria and make her phone call. Certain issues are a bit of an enigma. In other words, the first post on this thread from @Dr.Suave, might be correct.

I still believe that this was a good experiment that is still inconclusive. Because I sat next to her I just feel a bit different compared to before, I mean I can't feel hard with her. Not yet anyway.

 

[PlatoPacks23]

You lost me after you said you couldn't do pushups at home.

 

[PlatoPacks23]

How do you have 9,000 posts here and you can't even talk to a woman at lunch?

I'd get off this board dude it seems like it's led to you being in your head more than actual doing anything productive

 

[PlatoPacks23]

So, whatever I wrote about earlier could be discredited as some type of limerance, and is simply a crush with a lady that has a higher SMV than I do and therefore I should not have felt happy about the lunch encounter but should have felt sad instead. I should not be entitled to feel happy if it was really a fail.

I certainly don't feel good after reading this thread. I mean it can be said this is checkmarked. I felt I did what I needed to do so there is not as much pressure to approach that specific girl again like before. At least I might have some closure and can move on to my merry little world away from everyone else feeling satisfied I at least made an effort.

Now I'm being attacked by music videos:

Well, I have to admit, my capacity for creatively pulling music videos to change state is quite interesting.

It's like I'm more happy with myself for trying than the actual outcome.

I dont' believe the "right girl" is in this office though. Whatever is occupying my mind about this.

in the time you watched these 3 music videos, you could have done 50 (non consecutive) push ups. Hell, you could have done it while listening to them! Talk about productive..

 

[corrector]

If I was Gymmaxxed and Looksmaxxed would the advice be different? Maybe this thread would be different too?

I don't know if I can 100% buy that. What about making an emotional connection and things like that? Are we overestimating how much Gymmaxxing and Looksmaxxing would work in my case?

Anyway, lets here from some of the other posters on here. @needimprovement250 @characternote what say you about this?

I will do some pushups next time before I post on here. That will at least take away that type of talk. Just to keep certain people quiet. That's good enough reason for me to do some pushups.

 

[Mike32ct]

If I was Gymmaxxed and Looksmaxxed would the advice be different? Maybe this thread would be different too?

I don't know if I can 100% buy that. What about making an emotional connection and things like that? Are we overestimating how much Gymmaxxing and Looksmaxxing would work in my case?

Anyway, lets here from some of the other posters on here. @needimprovement250 @characternote what say you about this?

I will do some pushups next time before I post on here. That will at least take away that type of talk. Just to keep certain people quiet. That's good enough reason for me to do some pushups.

Emotional connection (in the absence of a solid physical attraction) leads to friendzone.

I honestly tried that route before. It does not work. It’s totally fine for bonding with female friends, but that’s it.

I like emotional connections. I genuinely wish it worked alone in the romantic sense, but that’s not my experience at all. Looks always come first.

 

[corrector]

Okay sat next to her again. She just left 1 min ago. She is seeing someone for a year and a half. Should have asked that first. She is not a Christian either. But we like each others company and it was a pleasant second experience.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

How many pushups did you do before posting again?

As to your previous post, it’s the equivalent of an JPL engineer obsessed about a lunar landing when the lift stage and boosters aren’t even conceptualized.

Yea looks and gym maxing would have helped in any circumstance, they are the freaking launch pad…

For a black pill dude that thinks looks are everything you sure ask weird questions.

p.s. Now THATS A BODY…

 

[PlatoPacks23]

before every post you make in the future you should do 20 pushups

that would help more than anything anyone can offer on this board currently

you think I'm trolling but I promise you its true. pretty sure you will be more obsessed with getting 50 pushups in a row then any of this stuff which will inevitably help you with woman not being seen as your main purpose

 

[corrector]

Likr I said, I asked her out and she said maybe with a very nice flirt tone. That is like a yes. That was before I asked if she was single (ie why she said maybe instead of yes).

 

[MatureDJ]

I honestly don't know what to make of this. I approached a lady I think I have a crush on in the cafeteria, asked her if I could sit next to her for lunch, after a brief small talk and sat the next seat next to her. We didn't do much talking at all. I ended up watching something on my Tablet and she scrolled down her phone and ended up talking to someone else. The lunch was over and I just walked out back to my desk.

The issue is I felt blissfully happy about the whole encounter. I felt like I was on a high for the rest of the evening because I was physically sitting next to her. I did whatever I wanted to next to her. Ate my salad bowl, had minimal to no interaction with her, watched my own TV, and she was doing whatever she wanted to as well. Ironically it felt like I had more fun compared to sitting on a table my myself despite there being no social interaction or positive feedback about the whole thing coming form her.

The idea of doing this was that I felt jealous when I saw another guy sit next to her for lunch the previous day. My blood boiled when I saw that and I had intense emotional feelings that carried over for a few days, and I'm like, why am I like this, if I feel it's such a big deal, then I can do that myself. The other guy wasn't present today in this room so I took the plunge and approached her. She did not get up and walk away before I got up and left despite there being a number of unoccupied seats nearby.

Now, I never actually sat next to a girl in that position before and ate together with her in a social setting where other people can see us together that close. Honestly, not even with my exes or any lady that I can remember in the past. This was like the first time I EVER did something like this and was even more surprized, given the absence of social interaction/other activities she was doing, she didn't actually walk off, like that other girl did in the GYM, back in 2018 when I went to a threadmill next to hers and started putting on my Tablet.

I'm leaning on this was some social experiement, that there is no real intent in pursuing anything romantically with her given the rather happy state of mind after the encounter, rather than it being some informal date going badly, otherwise there would be negative emotions associated with this. Shouldn't I be feeling bad since there was virtually no connection? Why am I so happy about this and even want to do that again even if it has the same outcome? What is the deal with this? Should I be feeling bad about this?

I think I know the feeling - after a long drought, just getting in an at-bat gives me a jolt of joy. Just keep swinging.

 

[MatureDJ]

Likr I said, I asked her out and she said maybe with a very nice flirt tone. That is like a yes. That was before I asked if she was single (ie why she said maybe instead of yes).

Well, this doesn't sound very good ...

 

[PlatoPacks23]

never mind, goos luck

 

[corrector]

Well, this doesn't sound very good ...

It sounded rather positive at the moment. I just sat next to her twice and she may have been kept off guard. If I choose to pursue (very debatable) we like each others company in the lunch room and she makes me feel at ease and just feel happy enough around her.

The debatables comes to values. She already is seeing someone and is also not a Christian. However if there is some chemistry then it can still be tempting. On the other hand, if I can continue to sit next to her, I can watch Christian content on my Tablet (which was what I did the first time anyway). Why not have someone I might look forward to sitting beside for lunch?

 

[PlatoPacks23]

can someone tell me how to stop getting notifications for this thread?

 

[corrector]

can someone tell me how to stop getting notifications for this thread?

The emotional turmoil is now gone and I feel purged and at peace with myself. Why do you think I will keep updating this thread? I am not going to continue speculating about her if I got to the truth yesterday.

 

[Desdinova]

We didn't do much talking at all. I ended up watching something on my Tablet

Well... If you have a lot of anxiety with regards to approaching women, this is a good start. But dude, you've been here for more than a decade.

Okay sat next to her again. She just left 1 min ago. She is seeing someone for a year and a half.

If you've got yourself in a position where you can see her everyday, then that lump of beta male she's been putting up with will be easy to get rid of. All you need to do is be more interesting and exciting than him and she'll drop him like a mouldy kiwi. Remember, the longer a woman is with a man, the more comfortable he's going to be in the relationship. Unless he's a natural, he likely stopped doing all the right things to keep her interested. Scooping a woman out of a boring relationship is easy.

Your next goal should be to initiate kino unless she's already done that.

 

[corrector]

If you've got yourself in a position where you can see her everyday, then that lump of beta male she's been putting up with will be easy to get rid of. All you need to do is be more interesting and exciting than him and she'll drop him like a mouldy kiwi. Remember, the longer a woman is with a man, the more comfortable he's going to be in the relationship. Unless he's a natural, he likely stopped doing all the right things to keep her interested. Scooping a woman out of a boring relationship is easy.

Okay, noted. I will talk myself back into this and try not to talk myself out of this. It looks like she's willing with me and I'm the one who is putting up rules or barriers, so I don't want to abort something nice if I don't have to.

Your next goal should be to initiate kino unless she's already done that.

Okay. I'll keep that in mind.

 

[Desdinova]

Okay, noted. I will talk myself back into this and try not to talk myself out of this. It looks like she's willing with me and I'm the one who is putting up rules or barriers, so I don't want to abort something nice if I don't have to.

The worst you can get is right back where you started. You have absolutely nothing to lose.