Texting & Date Advise

[Learning Curve]

Hey guys,

This post is for me to better understand your perspective and any advise is appreciated on how to approach women from the texting aspect of view and first dates.

I met a girl at my work she was looking at me from day one long story short i escalated to a first date. We met, went out she did not talk much from my understanding she was not that comfortable, maybe because the place i found was slightly crowded but pretty good bar for a night out. Switched to a second places, i was not that deceive where to go but I have escalated to a next place that had pretty much loud music but we had fun (should have escalated for somewhere quiet)

On place number two, she was touching me a-lot, playing with her hair and all that good stuff. Again she did not talk that much the way i handled that was to be ****y-playful relaxed and did not talk too much either mostly looking at her. Long story short we left, kissed at the end of the night (Could have escalated to sex) but did not.

She texted me right after i dropped her to her car, if i arrived and it ender there.

Next day she liked some of my Instagram stories and i escalated for a text after 1-2 hours it was Saturday late in the night i will share the text exchange here:

Me: The place here has great music...
Her: The DJ must be good then (I was the deejay for that place)
Me: Probably.. )
Her: Sends me a picture (Short t-shirt and pants)
Her: Enjoy....
Me: Home alone?
Her: With a friend
Me: Enjoy
Her: You too its the letter of the law..
Me: You know the law better than me (Inside joke i developed that she looks like a lawyer from the way she actually dresses)
Her: If you end up in jail you know who to call...
Me: I will judge based on experience and choose wisely..
Her: Good for you because we will be most probably fully booked to take your case..
Me: Not bored at home?
Her: No why?
Me: Asking in any case if you have something to suggest..
Her: Miss me?
Me: Slightly your crazy mind..
Her: I find it logical
Me: Why?
Her: Because I would miss me also (She tried to play ****y here)
Her: Joking
Me: You need to work on your jokes
Her: I'm having fun
Me: Enjoy it
Her: Good Night
Me: Good Night

My plan is to text her after 4-5 days for a second date we work in the same floor in the same building, so i will also see here there daily. But i will not escalate any further before that.

She is a ****y one.

Any suggestions on how to improve on the text game, and how to move forward from here?

 

[NealIRC]

Do women ever post on public forums with asking help on texting guys?

Or never mind that do women ever text/ask their female friends for advice on texting guys. Hmm.

 

[Bigpapa]

Hey guys,

This post is for me to better understand your perspective and any advise is appreciated on how to approach women from the texting aspect of view and first dates.

I met a girl at my work she was looking at me from day one long story short i escalated to a first date. We met, went out she did not talk much from my understanding she was not that comfortable, maybe because the place i found was slightly crowded but pretty good bar for a night out. Switched to a second places, i was not that deceive where to go but I have escalated to a next place that had pretty much loud music but we had fun (should have escalated for somewhere quiet)

On place number two, she was touching me a-lot, playing with her hair and all that good stuff. Again she did not talk that much the way i handled that was to be ****y-playful relaxed and did not talk too much either mostly looking at her. Long story short we left, kissed at the end of the night (Could have escalated to sex) but did not.

She texted me right after i dropped her to her car, if i arrived and it ender there.

Next day she liked some of my Instagram stories and i escalated for a text after 1-2 hours it was Saturday late in the night i will share the text exchange here:

Me: The place here has great music...
Her: The DJ must be good then (I was the deejay for that place)
Me: Probably.. )
Her: Sends me a picture (Short t-shirt and pants)
Her: Enjoy....
Me: Home alone?
Her: With a friend
Me: Enjoy
Her: You too its the letter of the law..
Me: You know the law better than me (Inside joke i developed that she looks like a lawyer from the way she actually dresses)
Her: If you end up in jail you know who to call...
Me: I will judge based on experience and choose wisely..
Her: Good for you because we will be most probably fully booked to take your case..
Me: Not bored at home?
Her: No why?
Me: Asking in any case if you have something to suggest..
Her: Miss me?
Me: Slightly your crazy mind..
Her: I find it logical
Me: Why?
Her: Because I would miss me also (She tried to play ****y here)
Her: Joking
Me: You need to work on your jokes
Her: I'm having fun
Me: Enjoy it
Her: Good Night
Me: Good Night

My plan is to text her after 4-5 days for a second date we work in the same floor in the same building, so i will also see here there daily. But i will not escalate any further before that.

She is a ****y one.

Any suggestions on how to improve on the text game, and how to move forward from here?

dude, she is all green

do not think too much about it, tell her that you like her and would like to meet her

and then continue that you have some tough days ahead, but you are free starting Thursday or something

 

[Divorced w 3]

She liked you. I do agree give her a couple days to let your date marinate on her emotions and then reach out very definitively with more plans.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

My plan is to text her after 4-5 days for a second date we work in the same floor in the same building, so i will also see here there daily. But i will not escalate any further before that.

So you wait until Thursday/Friday before you contact her, hoping she is all free for weekend activity with you and vice versa implying you are free all weekend to make plans with her?

If she tells you at the end of the week "well i allready have plans for the weekend", you might have wasted a whole week and will only be able to escalate allmost 2 weeks after your last date.
Thats where the other guys come in trying to bang her, leaving aside the point that there might be awkward situations at work because she doesnt know where this is going.

Strike the iron while its hot man.....

Tell her you had a good time and ask if she wants to go do XYZ with you on Friday or Sunday, because "you need legal advice about flirting at work" from her. Make sure its a place/activity she feels comfortable at and where you can escalate.

If she´s "not free", wait for her to make a suggestion.... but dont go on Saturday, that again would imply you have nothing going on in your life and allready made her a priority. Just tell her your with friends doing xyz.

You need to lead this, not wait for her to make a move.


That said, you better be "serious" about this with a work colleague. You see her every day in case you just think about pumping and dumping.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Any suggestions on how to improve on the text game, and how to move forward from here?

No double texts, no long texts, no over-sharing, keep it simple, stfu and more or less mirror her response time. Agree & Amplify when possible. Be c0cky & funny when possible. Invite her to places you had to go anyway, she can tag along if she wants.

 

[Glassguy]

No double texts, no long texts, no over-sharing, keep it simple, stfu and more or less mirror her response time. Agree & Amplify when possible. Be c0cky & funny when possible. Invite her to places you had to go anyway, she can tag along if she wants.

This ^^^.
She is obviously looking forward to seeing you again. Go ahead and set the next date. Try to pick her up or have her meet at your place.

"I'm thinking about going to such and such place Friday evening and you should join me. Should I pick you up or would you rather meet at my place at 7?"

This way you are both setting up the date and also setting up sex to happen.

Don't over text between now and then after setting up the date. Just respond to her initiating texts and be somewhat sporadic about your response times. Don't make it look like you're staring at your phone waiting for her to text you. Besides, you should have a busy life and shouldn't be staring at your phone anyways

 

[Learning Curve]

Thanks a lot for all the responses @Glassguy @Dr.Suave @ThisIsSparta @Divorced w 3 @Bigpapa

She texted me yesterday, second date has been set for Thursday, not Friday or Saturday as I'm busy doing other stuff.

Told her I will send the location to her later today.

I will also tell her today to pick her up on Thursday. I already know there will be a **** test coming of her wanting to come with her own car.

 

[Learning Curve]

Also, i wanted to ask if you guys have any specific insights on how to escalate to sex on the second date?

Meaning any proper escalation, techniques, time of date before leaving (of course you follow the flow), and any information.

Also, any playful verbal games you use? @Glassguy @Dr.Suave @ThisIsSparta @Divorced w 3 @Bigpapa

 

[Bigpapa]

Also, i wanted to ask if you guys have any specific insights on how to escalate to sex on the second date?

Meaning any proper escalation, techniques, time of date before leaving (of course you follow the flow), and any information.

Also, any playful verbal games you use? @Glassguy @Dr.Suave @ThisIsSparta @Divorced w 3 @Bigpapa

just escalate step by step

touch her friendly, then a bit more suave, then try to kiss her, then walk her home and when close ask her if you can come up to take a piss

then see where it goes

 

[Murk]

Her: Good for you because we will be most probably fully booked to take your case..

Me: I'm sure you can slide me in, our secret (or something to that effect).

I take any chance for sexual innuendo when I start texting a new girl, just so they know I'm a sexual being.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I have to assume English isn't your first language? The texts seem kinda weirdly phrased at times and overall kinda boring.

Do not engage in one word texting. Pointless and lame...

Either provide some type of value with your texts or don't text at all. You will do better not texting at all than sending one word replies that provide nothing.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Also, i wanted to ask if you guys have any specific insights on how to escalate to sex on the second date?

Meaning any proper escalation, techniques, time of date before leaving (of course you follow the flow), and any information.

Also, any playful verbal games you use? @Glassguy @Dr.Suave @ThisIsSparta @Divorced w 3 @Bigpapa

Women always want the guy who is going to escalate. You can do your best to get her in the mood prior by going push-pull. With that said, you can’t guarantee she’s going to put out on the second date.

 

[Barrister]

OP,

When it comes to texting before the 1st date, you just need to set it up, and then only text when she reaches out. Less is more. You want to be building up her anticipation and letting her wonder what you are up to before the date. @Glassguy and @Dr.Suave gave you good advice to a T on how to approach this moving forward. Reach out in a day or two (and I wouldn't wait too much longer than that) and ask her to meet you in a few days from that somewhere. Make the logistics work out for you to end up at hers or she at yours. You know the drill from there.

 

[Learning Curve]

I have to assume English isn't your first language? The texts seem kinda weirdly phrased at times and overall kinda boring.

Do not engage in one word texting. Pointless and lame...

Either provide some type of value with your texts or don't text at all. You will do better not texting at all than sending one word replies that provide nothing.

English is my second language, the above text is translated from Greek.

I'm half Polish/greek but English is also my native language. I lived in the UK and studied.

I tried my best to translate it to English to make sense, so I know it does not make sense in some sentences you get the point though.

 

[Learning Curve]

I reached out yesterday, to actually send the location and follow @Glassguy advice on picking her up or meeting at my place.

Again sh3tests are all over the place. She told me "We can arrange this on the day of the date this is not important right now"

I told her "Better do what is important speak later"

From that, a range of exchanges escalated to her sending videos of her actually talking and again the playfulness went to the next level, with sexual innuendos. Teasing her about the "not important", and ending the conversation afterwards.

Now since she said "is not important" I was thinking of not text her, not even on Thursday and if she does not reach out to escalate the logistics I will not even show up on the date.

Any suggestions?

 

[Murk]

Now since she said "is not important" I was thinking of not text her, not even on Thursday and if she does not reach out to escalate the logistics I will not even show up on the date.

Any suggestions?

Solid plan, her response would have pissed me off and I would do the same. That’s not a normal response to scheduling a date. You’re a busy man that likes to have things planned out and know what you’re doing.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I reached out yesterday, to actually send the location and follow @Glassguy advice on picking her up or meeting at my place.

Again sh3tests are all over the place. She told me "We can arrange this on the day of the date this is not important right now"

I told her "Better do what is important speak later"

From that, a range of exchanges escalated to her sending videos of her actually talking and again the playfulness went to the next level, with sexual innuendos. Teasing her about the "not important", and ending the conversation afterwards.

Now since she said "is not important" I was thinking of not text her, not even on Thursday and if she does not reach out to escalate the logistics I will not even show up on the date.

Any suggestions?

Please read book of Pook. I constantly come back to it. Make your inner wiring on it.

You tell her it’s all good no worries we will roll with it tomorrow. Then you just stop responding. Do you have a job, do you have other activities or hobbies? You don’t give the impression of having much of a life if you are writing her back constantly.

The day comes. You tell her whatever the plans are. If she counters once and you like it fine. If she has a problem with it you say no worries we don’t seem to have this in common it’s all good. Have a great rest of the day. And then you dump her.

 

[Learning Curve]

Please read book of Pook. I constantly come back to it. Make your inner wiring on it.

You tell her it’s all good no worries we will roll with it tomorrow. Then you just stop responding. Do you have a job, do you have other activities or hobbies? You don’t give the impression of having much of a life if you are writing her back constantly.

The day comes. You tell her whatever the plans are. If she counters once and you like it fine. If she has a problem with it you say no worries we don’t seem to have this in common it’s all good. Have a great rest of the day. And then you dump her.

Hey thanks for your reply.

She is initiating contact, not my self. Also when a chick says "it's not important" you can't just say no worries. Is not the way it works, especially with chicks like this one that have a tight game.

She is an 8 in my eyes, hot body, pretty face so guys are storming her most probably and she is giving the same responses. If I say no worries it communicates "hey do more of that to me" "show me how low value i am by saying is not important" it's not how i roll.

If you roll this way and it works good for you. In my world when a chick says "its not important" she is entering the disqualification mode.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Hey thanks for your reply.

She is initiating contact, not my self. Also when a chick says "it's not important" you can't just say no worries. Is not the way it works, especially with chicks like this one that have a tight game.

She is an 8 in my eyes, hot body, pretty face so guys are storming her most probably and she is giving the same responses. If I say no worries it communicates "hey do more of that to me" "show me how low value i am by saying is not important" it's not how i roll.

If you roll this way and it works good for you. In my world when a chick says "its not important" she is entering the disqualification mode.

If you know all the answers, why are you asking for help?