The current dating market and how I see this century playing out

sangheilios

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I've been noticing a trend on youtube where a lot of channels are popping up that are dedicated to the issues that young men are facing in the current dating market. I've also noticed that these channels are attracting a lot of attention, something you can see with their view counts, and this shows that men are relating to what is being discussed. I've also seen this trend even spilling over into mainstream media recently, such as the stat where 2/3 of men being single and these numbers being discussed on a news channel.

The millennial generation has for a long time now been adults in the dating market and gen zs are starting to enter it now. I believe that the issue where young men are struggling to even get a date, let alone a gf, is going to be a trend that is here to stay that will have quite severe consequences for society. I feel a really good view on how things will play out in America is to look at places like Japan.

A large number of men are literally being told by women that they aren't good enough, essentially being rejected by society. I believe that given enough of these experiences and the right set of circumstances you will see these men check out entirely. You'll definitely see some mental health issues with this, such as an increased use in anti depressants, anxiety medication, etc. However, I feel the bigger impact will be men that will focus on enjoying their own lives as they see fit. This will vary depending upon the individual, but some negative things would be gambling, excessive video game use, drug use, alcohol, etc. Draft Kings is a great example, this took off starting from the time of the Pandemic and is no legal in many states. You might see men that believe there is little incentive to put extra effort into anything and they essentially do the bare minimum. What's the point of busting your ass at some job or grinding through a difficult degree program when it doesn't make a difference. You basically have a pool of men that will just get by in life because they know nothing they do matters.

I also believe that many factors outside of the dating market as a whole are at play as well. I believe the rapid increase in housing prices is a huge buffer for mating. I also believe that the current woke culture is a detriment to many things but with the dating market being one of them. Stuff like this just further isolates people and draws them inward. I believe that the COVID pandemic and the lockdowns accelerated this trend towards isolation.

I believe that much of what we are seeing is the actual panning out of a population collapse in the developed world. In East Asia it's already been a slow trend for a long time that is now starting to show itself, we can even see these nations panicking about their demographic future. However, we can see a much more severe case of this in the former Soviet bloc countries in Eastern Europe, which have lost significant portions of their populations since the fall of the iron curtain. The U.S and western Europe will temporarily be immune to this due to immigration, but I believe this will not make much of a difference. We are going to see a rapidly aging population where fewer and fewer children are being born.

The higher powers in the world are quite aware of this major demographic change that is on the way. Elon Musk has discussed this issue and it's something that is secretly a concern of many nations. AI technology and automation are naturally already on the way, but I expect a heavy investment into these fields due to the eventual dwindling of the working age population. The technology isn't quite there yet, but by the middle of this century I believe it will be quite advanced. This will undoubtedly bring tremendous changes to society as a whole, though it's hard to imagine how this will play out exactly.

While this all sounds like doom and gloom, I think there is something else that will come from this. I believe that down the road more conservative and traditional values are going to take hold. The west is in a cultural mess due to this woke nonsense but I believe that this is a phase that we are going through. I believe that the younger generations are slowly starting to reject this nonsense and seeing it for what it is. Political leanings are often based on personality and temperament, qualities that have a strong genetic link. I see the more liberal minded individuals essentially not reproducing at all and those along more conservative lines having children. Think about those that go to church or grow up in more traditional family settings, these are the ones that will have children. The man that is a feminist or self sterilizes himself by thinking he is a woman will not have children. I believe that as the century progresses we will see a shift towards this, though not before we see a tremendous decline in population.
 
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SargeMaximus

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Th sad part is religion isn’t the answer either. Wokeism arose because traditional ways failed us. Going back to them is not the answer. A third, middle way is required
 

sangheilios

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Th sad part is religion isn’t the answer either. Wokeism arose because traditional ways failed us. Going back to them is not the answer. A third, middle way is required
I saw a stat a few months ago that showed the Amish were one of the fastest growing demographic groups in the U.S. They are traditionally based in PA, but I saw something a long time ago about them wanting to create colonies in the western part of the U.S, I believe Montana was one of them.

I'm not a religious person, but what I'm getting at is that those who are more conservative minded will be those that reproduce at a much higher rate compared to the current more liberal minded individuals. Conservatism is correlated with church going, I really shouldn't have to explain why that is. These are the individuals that will have children, not those who are obsessed with trans rights, feminism, etc.
 

SW15

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It's difficult to predict the next 75 years. This was a thoughtful and quality post.

I've also seen this trend even spilling over into mainstream media recently, such as the stat where 2/3 of men being single and these numbers being discussed on a news channel.
Women don't care that these men are single. They were already rejecting them. Most women don't care when a man decides to go MGTOW. He was already rejected and invisible to them.

A large number of men are literally being told by women that they aren't good enough, essentially being rejected by society. I believe that given enough of these experiences and the right set of circumstances you will see these men check out entirely. You'll definitely see some mental health issues with this, such as an increased use in anti depressants, anxiety medication, etc. However, I feel the bigger impact will be men that will focus on enjoying their own lives as they see fit. This will vary depending upon the individual, but some negative things would be gambling, excessive video game use, drug use, alcohol, etc. Draft Kings is a great example, this took off starting from the time of the Pandemic and is no legal in many states. You might see men that believe there is little incentive to put extra effort into anything and they essentially do the bare minimum. What's the point of busting your ass at some job or grinding through a difficult degree program when it doesn't make a difference. You basically have a pool of men that will just get by in life because they know nothing they do matters.
If you are one of these invisible men, nothing matters. Male invisibility has been one of the reasons why porn use has increased and there are many simps on OnlyFans. Men are engaging in a lot of the sedation tactics you mentioned. Porn, OnlyFans/social media simping, video games, drugs, and alcohol are common sedation tactics to cope with male invisibility. Many men are getting feedback from the sexual marketplace that they aren't good enough. There are plenty of men who are invisible today who would have been able to have a fairly conventional mating marketplace experience 30-50 years ago. There are plenty of 60-75 year old Boomer males who were ordinary men who were able to have long term marriage with children or get divorced and re-married. These 60-75 year old Boomer men were not invisible in the sexual marketplace when they were actively seeking partners. They have also kept someone around despite being ordinary. These relationships might not be higher quality relationships, but at least they are completely invisible. The Millennial/early Gen Z sons of these 60-75 year old Boomer males are often invisible men who are incel/borderline incel despite being ordinary looking and having at least adequate social skills.

The millennial generation has for a long time now been adults in the dating market and gen zs are starting to enter it now. I believe that the issue where young men are struggling to even get a date, let alone a gf, is going to be a trend that is here to stay that will have quite severe consequences for society. I feel a really good view on how things will play out in America is to look at places like Japan.
The Millennial generation in the United States has been a complete failure. In 2023, Millennials are between 27-42 years old. Gen Z's are between 11-26 years old.

The Millennial generation is well established, especially the 1981-1989 born Millennials (34-42 years old) in 2023.

If you consider the 1981-1989 born Millennials, most aren't in a great place. Most 34-42 year olds today are worse off than when their Boomer parents were 35-42.

A good number of the 34-42 year olds today have managed to get into committed relationships and have children. However, a greater percentage of 34-42 year olds now are childless and if they are in relationships, these relationships are less stable than what previous generations had.

My non-representative social circle with Millennials in this age range has seen couplings and "Last Call" babies in the last couple of years.

In Japan, the mating marketplace crashed after the Nikkei crashed in 1989, causing a severe economic recession that lasted throughout the 1990s and into the 2000s. Lots of men in Japan became herbivore men in that era, and were essentially invisible to women. In the United States, the mating marketplace was severely affected by the late 2000s/early 2010s recession.

The west is in a cultural mess due to this woke nonsense but I believe that this is a phase that we are going through I believe that the younger generations are slowly starting to reject this nonsense and seeing it for what it is. Political leanings are often based on personality and temperament, qualities that have a strong genetic link. I see the more liberal minded individuals essentially not reproducing at all and those along more conservative lines having children.
Millennials and Gen Z'ers who vote tend to vote for political candidates who support progressive/woke ideologies. I have yet to observe a mass shift among Millennials and Gen Z'ers.

Your point about fertility rates by ideology is likely to have some merit. Higher income, liberal Millennials are coupling up and having their "Last Call" 1.3 children in their mid to late 30s. The more conservative Millennial couples, though rarer, are having their 2.2 children.
 

SargeMaximus

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I saw a stat a few months ago that showed the Amish were one of the fastest growing demographic groups in the U.S. They are traditionally based in PA, but I saw something a long time ago about them wanting to create colonies in the western part of the U.S, I believe Montana was one of them.

I'm not a religious person, but what I'm getting at is that those who are more conservative minded will be those that reproduce at a much higher rate compared to the current more liberal minded individuals. Conservatism is correlated with church going, I really shouldn't have to explain why that is. These are the individuals that will have children, not those who are obsessed with trans rights, feminism, etc.
So… I don’t go to church… and I’m not obsessed with trans rights… so what am I?
 

corrector

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So… I don’t go to church… and I’m not obsessed with trans rights… so what am I?
You said you have women from church knocking on your door and giving you blow-jobs. Of course you are not going to be interested in going to church. Just a bunch of hypocrite hoes right?
 

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The key issue is less and less young man are getting the needed experience with women at a young age and forgoing it until college or later. More than likely technology is making it easier for men to stay inside and not interact with women at all.
 

corrector

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The key issue is less and less young man are getting the needed experience with women at a young age and forgoing it until college or later. More than likely technology is making it easier for men to stay inside and not interact with women at all.
I'm sure Gen-Xers such as myself and @MatureDJ would argue that going to an all boys high school is to blame rather than technology.
 

The Duke

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Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times.

Step back in American history 100 years and see if this quote doesn't apply. The Roaring 20's, The Great Depression, WW1, WW2, Vietnam, The Baby Boom, Woodstock, Hippies, The 80's consumerism, Decline of Religion & Family, No Fault Divorces, Too much social media, Incels, Wokeism, Mass Shootings.

Although I haven't lived thru all of that, I did know many that shared their stories from all of those periods. The only good thing about what's going on now is people are starting to talk about it, and talk is what initiates change.
 

The Duke

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Not sure if you still have me blocked Corrector, but all boys and all girls schools have been around long before you went to school.
 
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Kotaix

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Th sad part is religion isn’t the answer either. Wokeism arose because traditional ways failed us. Going back to them is not the answer. A third, middle way is required
The goal of wokeism is to destroy traditional ways, it's going to fail, and it's going to cause a backlash. This is already happening, with conservatives swinging too far the other way.

Things will eventually work out on their own, we are in completely uncharted territory.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Interesting point that the leftists/wokeist types will likely be selected against in the gene pool, though largely self-imposed which is hilarious. So this issue could self-correct to some degree.

I am wondering how this will effect the workforce. I have a hunch that the only reason most men work so hard so is they can attract a woman and/or secure a family. Hilarious that feminists complain about the "wage gap" (which I'm sure yall know is a myth), but refuse to marry a guy unless he makes more than them. They also fail to consider that men simply work hard to support their family, but women work hard for her "independance".

Education is already incredibly femcentric and the workforce is becoming increasingly femcentric too. Men will, naturally, maintain 99.9% of responsibility for all the skilled physical labor that keeps our civilization going, but I suspect that the soul crushing 9-5 office jobs will largely become increasingly female dominated over the years, even in industries like software engineering, because men will have less motivation to work hard fat these soul crushing jobs if they cannot attract a women and start a family.
 
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corrector

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Not sure if you still have me blocked Corrector, but all boys and all girls schools have been around long before you went to school.
Exactly, and technology was not an excuse then either.
 

SargeMaximus

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The goal of wokeism is to destroy traditional ways, it's going to fail, and it's going to cause a backlash. This is already happening, with conservatives swinging too far the other way.

Things will eventually work out on their own, we are in completely uncharted territory.
Yes but to end the pendulum swinging insanity, a new, third path is required
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

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sangheilios

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Interesting point that the leftists/wokeist types will likely be selected against in the gene pool, though largely self-imposed which is hilarious. So this issue could self-correct to some degree.

I am wondering how this will effect the workforce. I have a hunch that the only reason most men work so hard so is they can attract a woman and/or secure a family. Hilarious that feminists complain about the "wage gap" (which I'm sure yall know is a myth), but refuse to marry a guy unless he makes more than them. They also fail to consider that men simply work hard to support their family, but women work hard for her "independance".

Education is already incredibly femcentric and the workforce is becoming increasingly femcentric too. Men will, naturally, maintain 99.9% of responsibility for all the skilled physical labor that keeps our civilization going, but I suspect that the soul crushing 9-5 office jobs will largely become increasingly female dominated over the years, even in industries like software engineering, because men will have less motivation to work hard fat these soul crushing jobs if they cannot attract a women and start a family.
That's exactly what I was getting at with them being selected against in the gene pool. While it's quite unfortunate, I honestly think that these transgender individuals are mentally ill individuals who due to current pharmaceutical and surgical practices are allowed to fully sterilize themselves, thus preventing their genes from spreading. I think what makes someone like this is a very complex problem but I do believe that there is a heavy genetic component to this. Again, personality and temperament are heavily dictated by genetic factors.

That's also the point I was trying to bring up about men working hard. I personally believe that everything men do is ultimately to achieve status of some type, which at the end of the day means a higher chance of reproducing. A lot of this stuff is subconscious and not fully aware thoughts like "If I bust my ass at this job I can make a lot of money, buy a bunch of nice cars and clothes and this will let me attract women.".

When it comes to women, I think a big issue I see is these "educated" women with degrees refusing to date or marry men that either earn less than them or those that don't have a degree. A lot of men are not bothering with college today because they realize it's a waste of time and a ticket to substantial student loan debt. I grew up in the Boston metro and had a family member that worked at a hospital as a nurse. She mentioned how these young nurses were complaining about being single and that they were having a hard time finding men to date. I listened to the story, and then she said that they'd say there were no good men to date nor were there any men with "brains" to date. Are you going to tell me that in one of the biggest metros in the U.S there are no men that met this qualifications these women had?

All of this ties in with what I've been mentioning, it's a very deep and complex issue with a lot of variables at play working together.

To add to this, I really think the automation and AI will heavily influence the job market down the road and we might see some huge changes in our society. I really can't say what direction this will take us. I believe it will allow for tremendous strides in science and medicine, but I also believe there is the possibility that it will render many people functionally useless in the working world. It should be an interesting experiment for sure but I believe that these are necessary technologies. There is a reason why China and Japan are aggressively pursuing research and development into these fields.
 

sangheilios

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The key issue is less and less young man are getting the needed experience with women at a young age and forgoing it until college or later. More than likely technology is making it easier for men to stay inside and not interact with women at all.
There are a lot of variables at play, but I agree with this part in that it's socially stunting men and rendering many life long incels. Again, this is something you can see in Japan in particular. I also believe that the lockdowns during the pandemic exponentially accelerated a growing problem. I've been saying for a while that society never really fully went back to the way things were in 2019 before the lockdowns and that some changes we've seen are here to stay.
 

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As much as like some of the optimism, schools, colleges and universities have been hijacked. Adding new generations to the woke mob.
Teaching gender identities instead of mathematics. Politicizing sciences by removing biology. Censorship over discussion. Sensitivity over strength. Failure over drive. Entitlement over ambition. Feminism over masculinity. Participation trophys for all.
if we don’t take action, traditional values will die off and replaced by the newly minted brainwashed.
With enough time, we’ll be all speaking Mandarin. Historically the strong and the educated always rule.
 
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sangheilios

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As much as like some of the optimism, schools, colleges and universities have been hijacked. Adding new generations to the woke mob.
Teaching gender identities instead of mathematics. Politicizing sciences by removing biology. Sensitivity over strength. Failure over drive. Entitlement over ambition. Feminism over masculinity. Participation trophys for all.
if we don’t take action, traditional values will die off and replaced by the newly minted brainwashed.
With enough time, we’ll be all speaking Mandarin. Historically the strong and the educated always rule.
I don't think the Chinese are going to dominate this century like people believe. They are a rapidly aging population with a declining rate of fertility that is showing no signs of slowing down. Their population has been decreasing for a few years now and it's believed that they have no been replaced by India as the largest population on the planet. They also have a significant male-female gap due to the one child policy that was in place until not that long ago, which has left millions of men as lifelong bachelors.

I agree about your comments related to how universities have been hijaked by the leftists. I believe that people are starting to wake up and will beging boycotting college. College is just a scam to take money from people and people are now realizing that they are paying tens of thousands of dollars for a degree that is useless.
 

MatureDJ

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I'm sure Gen-Xers such as myself and @MatureDJ would argue that going to an all boys high school is to blame rather than technology.
It certainly is to blame early on, but after a while, maybe not so much. That said, I could a man for whom it was OVER in a coed high school later seeing Mary Jane Rottencrotch finally take interest in him (she will usually be a single mommy or a Wall-hitter by then :rolleyes:). For myself, it made realize early on that I needed to do cold approaches in some way just to get a stream of possibilities, whereas folks who had a normal high-school experience could probably rely on dating gals he knew (or their accumulated friends, etc.) in high school. :mad:
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

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