I was 19, depressed working at Target feeling like a loser constantly consuming red pill garbage content. I was upset at women, but truthfully I was the issue.
As I worked at Target, I went to mediocre parties to mingle with mediocre women. Month after month, tail after tail, and only scored with low-quality bs. I was honestly disappointed and felt I was a loser. The standard of women I dealt with in HS (hb8) was not the typical piece of ass I was reacting with anymore (at this moment, desperate milfs and 5-6s). Alongside, consuming red pill garbage content, I was upset and felt women were the problem. My ultimate goal of having a big family (4+ children) felt like a pipe dream. I wanted to have my first child at 23, but life said otherwise. Thus, I became even more frustrated.
I turned 20, and slightly improved my body, then I met my ex-girlfriend (18 y.o). She was taller than my short ass (I'm 5'6, and she's 5'9). I bang the bricks out of her till the wheels fell off. This relationship was bitter-sweet. At the time, I was over-abusing marijuana, hardly responsible with a horrible self-esteem, deep down I felt like a loser (I'm pretty sure I was during this time...kinda). She reminded me of the quality women I used to bang during my teen years...the petite girls. She honestly took my life in a positive direction because I was going downhill quickly. She gave me hope that my dream of a big family with a woman like her could happen.
Boom! As I was still brainwashed by the BS red pill garbage, I heard Rollo T. say "SoSuave" and I thought man...I need this. And yes...I did. SoSuave has been interesting, to say the least...for me, I can say I view this website as a Seasaw. For one, I can relate to and understand one side of the struggles of men..but at the same time, I cannot and view some ideologies as overreach.
Example: The people who talk about normies/chad/etc excessively, I don't believe those people to have much character. Personally, the men I know who are slaying the most poon usually don't fit the stereotype of "chad". In fact, they are the people with the most character who swim in the most poon (according to my life experience). And as I said last paragraph, the constant bickering of men's struggles/coping I see on the site, I'm sure it stems from men WITHOUT character.
All in all, what I realized from this site is that if you keep swimming in the depths and be very introspective, you'll be able to obtain a key to life not many people wield.
I personally I still have more questions I would like your guys' input on such as: escalating to sex, work/life/sex balance, family issues, etc etc. ...
Then maybe one day...I'll graduate.