Mindset tweak....

[RangerMIke]

Stop demanding respect: start expecting respect.

Seems like a small thing right? But it does make a world of difference in your attitude.

When you demand respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that lack of respect is something that happens to you all the time. It's a mindset that assumes people will not respect you.

When you expect respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that you value yourself and when you are treated with disrespect it is something that surprises you.

Discuss....

 

[jimwho]

What's the difference between demanding respect or expecting it "on a subconscious" level? Are you waiting
For disrespect to happen patently, or simply your aura (body language/resting face) surrounding you?

 

[Mike32ct]

Agree, but at first reading, I had a different angle/interpretation.

I would interpret that more as “I’m not forcing you to respect me. But if you don’t, I’ll ghost you. I’m only going to associate with people that value me.”

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Stop demanding respect: start expecting respect.

Seems like a small thing right? But it does make a world of difference in your attitude.

When you demand respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that lack of respect is something that happens to you all the time. It's a mindset that assumes people will not respect you.

When you expect respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that you value yourself and when you are treated with disrespect it is something that surprises you.

Discuss....

Respect is earned not given. Be worthy of respect and you'll likely stop having to wonder why you don't get it.

 

[RangerMIke]

Respect is earned not given. Be worthy of respect and you'll likely stop having to wonder why you don't get it.

Yep... you have to respect yourself before anyone else can. Eliminate anything in your life that you do not like about yourself, people who radiate respect are people who are capable of self-reflection with the disciple to change in their lives to eliminate self-doubt.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Yep... you have to respect yourself before anyone else can. Eliminate anything in your life that you do not like about yourself, people who radiate respect are people who are capable of self-reflection with the disciple to change in their lives to eliminate self-doubt.

They also treat others with respect and kindness as well and eliminate people from their lives who don't treat them with the same respect they treat others with.

 

[RangerMIke]

What's the difference between demanding respect or expecting it "on a subconscious" level? Are you waiting
For disrespect to happen patently, or simply your aura (body language/resting face) surrounding you?

Good question.

A person that demands respect, and does not get it is upset.

A person that expects respect, and does not get it is surprised.

It's like when a chick flakes on you, a man can get upset or a man can say 'huh... what's wrong with her, I'm great.'

We can all pick-up sub-conscious clues (especially women, they are darned good at this) based on our emotional response to what happens around us. The root cause of all negative emotion is expectation, when things do not go the way we want we get sad, angry, depressed, anxious etc. To avoid negative emotion people will often avoid situations where negative emotion MIGHT happen... so it holds you back.

To get to the point where you expect respect you have to first respect yourself. You can not respect yourself if you do not have the discipline to change the things you do not like about yourself or what is holding you back.

Now how a man deals with disrespect is really up to the individual. You should be authentic if you get angry, go ahead and be angry, but understand that negative emotions are not going to help you, EVER. It is a waste of emotional energy... rather than displaying negative emotion it's better to set it aside and hit the gym, workout, take a yoga class... turn that energy into positive action to change.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Good question.

A person that demands respect, and does not get it is upset.

A person that expects respect, and does not get it is surprised.

It's like when a chick flakes on you, a man can get upset or a man can say 'huh... what's wrong with her, I'm great.'

We can all pick-up sub-conscious clues (especially women, they are darned good at this) based on our emotional response to what happens around us. The root cause of all negative emotion is expectation, when things do not go the way we want we get sad, angry, depressed, anxious etc. To avoid negative emotion people will often avoid situations where negative emotion MIGHT happen... so it holds you back.

To get to the point where you expect respect you have to first respect yourself. You can not respect yourself if you do not have the discipline to change the things you do not like about yourself or what is holding you back.

Now how a man deals with disrespect is really up to the individual. You should be authentic if you get angry, go ahead and be angry, but understand that negative emotions are not going to help you, EVER. It is a waste of emotional energy... rather than displaying negative emotion it's better to set it aside and hit the gym, workout, take a yoga class... turn that energy into positive action to change.

You can effect this mindset change through other means that just self-discipline. A sense of accomplishment and/or a strongly defined sense of self (derived through soul searching) can work as well.

 

[TheManMasenko]

Stop demanding respect: start expecting respect.

Seems like a small thing right? But it does make a world of difference in your attitude.

When you demand respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that lack of respect is something that happens to you all the time. It's a mindset that assumes people will not respect you.

When you expect respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that you value yourself and when you are treated with disrespect it is something that surprises you.

Discuss....

Interesting post,

In my perspective I see respect comes in multitudes of ways.

1. Social status (f*** lots of women).
2. The way you treat others and yourself (be kind, dress well).
3. You're personality (funny, charismatic, or even demonstrating power; earning respect through fear)

Now respond to you, @RangerMIke "expect respect, you are sending out the sub-conscious message that you value yourself."

I always respected myself and expected respect. But more times than I could count, I never got respect for the three things listed and I was actually disrespected for respecting myself. In these moments, you must demand respect (stand up for yourself) because that is the only thing you can do.

If you stand your ground and are still disrespected, it's better not to associate with whatever anymore.

In the end, the people who disrespect you 9/10 are living a worse life than you. But that's not always true, I was a fat POS before and I was disrespected by my sporty "friends". I'm glad they did though because the way I was treating my body, I was disrespecting myself.

 

[TheManMasenko]

In addition, you can't be around people who disrespect you continuously.

It will only cause you to believe you are less than your worth which will bring forth other problems.

 

[Bokanovsky]

"Respect" is on of those words that gets thrown around often but it can mean different things to different people. If by respect you simply mean lack of disrespect (i.e. other people treating you in a polite and non-hostile manner, without rudeness or insults), then agree I agree, you should expect that kind of respect. However, if by respect you mean people recognizing and admiring your accomplishments, then no, you can neither expect nor demand it. That kind of respect does not come by default; it has to be earned.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Demanding and Expecting respect on a subconscious level is the same thing.

Don't demand nor expect respect.. Go out of your OWN way to show Respect to yourself, and to others. This will ultimately in turn develop attitudes and actions that will garner others to show you respect.

 

[RangerMIke]

Demanding and Expecting respect on a subconscious level is the same thing.

Don't demand nor expect respect.. Go out of your OWN way to show Respect to yourself, and to others. This will ultimately in turn develop attitudes and actions that will garner others to show you respect.

This works as long as a person is satisfied and happy with where they are in life.

I do agree that if you are happy with whatever current situation a person is in demanding and expecting respect are the same thing because quite frankly self-respect is just a natural part of who you are.